Big J's Little Blog

Not Being Clear?

2006-10-20T12:29:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I am wondering if my last post was so ambiguous that only a few understood. I'm over here forever now. I won't be doing as much with this blog right now. I have a new attitude, a new hope, and a new home. So, come join me as I dare to live outside the bathroom. If you want to know what I mean, you'll just have to read my first post. Not changing the thrust of my blog, just locations. So come spend some time hanging out with me at my new digs. I think you'll like it.

Over Here Y'all!

2006-10-17T11:44:00.000-07:00

Come on over here: http://lifeoutsidethebathroom.blogspot.com/

Massive Mutating Experiment

2006-10-13T13:40:00.000-07:00

So...I got nuthin today. Yup. I have something burning on the back plate that I may be getting out soon. My life is different since yesterday. I am a different person, back to being my old self. If my saying this confuses you, read yesterday's post.

Though, I will post this little bit on Friday the 13th, which today is:

Friday the 13th’s being unlucky is just a superstition, right? To test the theory, the British Journal of Medicine began a study in 1993 comparing traffic accidents on Fridays over a period of years. They found that even though fewer people chose to drive on Friday the 13th, there were more traffic accidents than on other Fridays. Their conclusion: “Friday 13th is unlucky for some. The risk of hospital admission as a result of a transport accident may be increased by as much as 52%. Staying at home is recommended.”

Also, here's a story you must read: http://www.usatoday.com/news/offbeat/2006-10-05-khan_x.htm?csp=34. Check out this excerpt:

We are not showing enough respect to Genghis Khan," he said. "We tend to use
his name more on vodka bottles. If today somebody produces toilet paper with
Genghis Khan's name, we do not know what to do about it as currently there
is no
law to regulate this issue.

Have a blessed weekend,

Jared

Can Hate Be Something We Don't Hate?

2006-10-12T16:30:00.000-07:00

I know I already posted this video, but just watch it again as I build my point. And if you only have dial-up (Niki), it is worth the wait.

So I ask you, can hate be good? I am beginning to feel that the answer to that question is a very resounding, "YES." If hate can cause true change, I think so. It has really caused me to think about me, my surroundings, and my actions in response to those surroundings. Read this quote from The Legacy of Sovereign Joy by John Piper:

"Here's the goal and the problem as Augustine saw it:

The soul of men shall hope under the shadow of Thy wings; they shall be made
drunk with the fullness of Thy house; and the torrents of Thy pleasures Thou
wilt give them to drink; for in Thee is the Fountain of Life, and in Thy Light
shall we see the light? Give me a man in love: he knows what I mean.
Give me one who yearns; give me one who is hungry; give me one far away in this
desert, who is thirsty and sighs for the spring of the Eternal country.
Give me that sort of man: he knows what I mean. But if I speak to a cold
man, he just does not know what I am talking about...

"These words from Augustine should make our hearts burn with renewed longing for God. And they should help us see why it is so difficult to display the glory of the Gospel to so many people. The reason is that so many do not long for anything very much. They are just coasting. They are not passionate about anything. They are 'cold' not just toward the glory of Christ in the Gospel, but toward everything. Even their sins are picked at rather than swallowed with passion."

My life has been a "picking at" in every sense of the expression over the last one and a half years; maybe even more. I truly have been cold toward everything in life. I have been taught that my passion should be curbed and is a bad thing. Rather than encourage me to channel that passion, I've been encouraged to ditch it. I've lost it, so I have become lethargic and cold. I have sat in a room with one tiny window, little work to concern myself with, and little social contact, which has encouraged that lethargy, and it has continued to give way to depression. What is not to hate about that?

NO MORE! I'm sick of this quasi-existence that I have lived! From now on, in my life, I will "sing it like I hate it!" How do I find this passion again? I don't know. What I do know: I will never pick at my sins or at my life again! If I do something wise or stupid, I'm swallowing it whole! I have lived with a spirit of timidity towards everything, and I hate that! I have lived with fear over this or that, and I hate that! I have grown cold in my concern and compassion for others, and I hate that! I have been afraid to do certain things, and I'm swallowing it whole! May I never be lukewarm again! I will sing it like I hate it! HATE SOMETHING, CHANGE SOMETHING! MAKE SOMETHING BETTER! AND I WILL!

Some say, "Dance like no one is watching," yet I say, from now on, "Sing it like you hate it!"

Now get out there and swallow life whole. Put down the cobb salad with fat free dressing. Quit pushing the croutons around your plate. Go out there and get a steak. Cook it medium-rare. Take huge bites. Gulp the red wine as if it were the last drink of anything you'll ever have. Sing it like you hate it.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

My Dog's Better Than Your Dog...

2006-10-11T14:09:00.000-07:00

So, since Niki didn't watch those videos, I'm going to fill this post with massive amounts of "inside jokes" referring to their subject matter that only those of us living in the 21st century will understand. Well...not really. But it made me chuckle to type that. If you have dial up, just get the bottom one to load, if you have time. It is completely worth it. It is about hate being good. You'll love it.

I made a coffee house quality homemade chai latte today. I did it for much less than you just bought yours for down at the local "FuFu Express Espresso." And I'd bet you mine tasted as good, if not better. For less than a buck for 32oz, try it and see:

2 Bigelow Chai (or Vanilla Chai) tea bags steeped in 1/2 to 2/3 cup water
1 1/2 cup milk microwaved and frothed with hand frother
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon honey (be generous)

Pour hot tea over honey to melt and combine, then pour in the frothed milk. Use the frother to blend the contents of the cup. Enjoy.

Now, if you don't have a hand frother, go buy one on eBay for $5 or search froogle for a "milk frother." Or you can go to your local kitchen store and shell out $20 for one. It's up to you. But that, and a stove top espresso maker are the only 2 things standing between you and top notch coffee house quality drinks made in your own home for a fraction of the price.

Actually, I lied. I made 3 chai lattes today. One for Jen (read on), then one for me, then one for me again because the first one was sooooo good.

More fast facts about tea: 2 cups of black tea contain as many heart healthy flavonoids as a serving of fruit or vegetables. So I'm going on 2.5 servings for the day, and I have an apple and banana, along with 10 cups more of green tea to consume. This is fairly average for me. I need to start drinking more black tea, though. Also, scientists think they have finally identified the anti-cancer agent in green tea. It has been believed to be anti-cancerous for a long time, but they finally have some definitive findings. And according to a story by MSNBC, black tea consumption may lower bad cholesterol levels and could one day be used to help reduce the chance of heart disease for those at risk, as reported by a US research team.

Niki will be disappointed with this post today too, because the following is something that she has already seen in some form. I will warn my readers that the following true story that I wrote this morning refers to sex, but does not describe anything about it, just mentions it as an issue in a positive context. It is also in the context of a marriage covenant and it wouldn't violate those already aware of sex. It is very much worth reading, I just put up my warning because of all the "family friendly" labeled blogs I'm attached to. Enjoy.

--

Jen was going to set the alarm to go off early this morning. I’ll leave it to your imagination as to why. Well, she totally forgot. She knew it was important to me. Since we keep slightly different schedules, she woke me from my slumber and told me she forgot and apologized. I told her that I forgave her and I meant it. I felt a little disappointed, but there was no point to carrying on. It wasn’t about to make “it” happen any sooner. I do have a significantly higher drive than she does, so it is important that it happens, but what good would it have done me to concern myself further with it?

In my tired stupor, I laid there in bed trying to go back to sleep. I couldn’t. My brain decided to fire up and get really busy. I can’t really remember what I was thinking about, but that isn’t really important. I think God was nudging me awake. So, I got up. I put some water on to boil, got out the honey, and microwaved some milk. I steeped three bags of chai tea, added the honey and frothed the milk. Putting my concoction together, I took it in to Jen, who was in the bathroom with the door closed and had no real clue that I was even out of bed. She was surprised to see me, and even more surprised that I had something for her. She unnecessarily apologized again, and I told her not to. That wasn’t why I was there. I spent a little more time with her and followed her around for the next 10 minutes before she left for work. She really enjoyed the chai latte and it really spoke to her. It is her “love language.”

As she left for work, I watched her leave from the front door. I thought to myself how fortunate I was to be married to her. I consider myself a lucky man. Something not based on sex, but on love. I think I am actually beginning to understand what 1 Corinthians 13 love is.

--

Here's a short video of Beeker from the Muppets rapping to a remix of one of the tracks from the score of Clue. This is worth more than just a few laughs.

I think that is all for today. Tune in tomorrow for more fun.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

All Quiet on the Western Front...

2006-10-10T14:30:00.000-07:00

Today is a quiet day in the world of Jared. Not necessarily a bad thing. Just not much to say. With that, just sit back, relax, and enjoy the funny videos.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

Tea, Pee, and Halloween

2006-10-09T11:08:00.000-07:00

I must say that I am flattered that so many people find little notes from my personal life so interesting that they would make it a habit to come by here and actually read them. It really makes my day. That is as close to positive verbal communication with others on many of my days. So, as Martha would say, "It's a good thing."

I have continued to consume tea like there's no tomorrow. I am still really enjoying it. I am feeling as if I am deriving some health benefits from it. And, even though I'm drinking 8 to 12 cups a day, it isn't making my bladder run non-stop. I'm thankful for that. One thing I do know: My "morning breath" is actually no where nearly as bad as it used to be. I wouldn't call it pleasant, but it is in comparison to what it used to be. I think this is due to the fact that I am largely drinking a lot more green and white tea. I don't like green tea (the "bagged" kind) on its own. To me, it tastes like dirt. But I drink green tea blended with honey, lemongrass, and ginseng, or with blueberries. Today, I'm drinking white tea with tangerine (Bigelow brand) and honey, lemon, ginseng green tea (Fred Meyer/Kroger store brand, which is surprisingly excellent and surprisingly inexpensive). Go drink more tea. You'll be glad you did. BTW, Bigelow brand makes a great chai tea. It is the only chai I have ever tasted that could replicate the flavor of a coffee house chai latte with a strong tea brewed from it. I'd say 2 tea bags brewed in 8oz of water, add some vanilla syrup and frothed milk, and you'd have yourself a coffee house quality beverage.

By the way, for those of you who disparage coffee (you know who you are), coffee has almost as much antioxidant content as green tea, and a far greater content than black tea. Keep in mind, the lighter the roast, the greater the antioxidant levels. I only drink light to full-city roast coffees anyway.

Someone changed the password for the voicemail at my shared desk and didn't tell me. That little blinking light that tells me I have a message is about to make me go nuts. I may unplug the stupid thing just to get it to quit blinking. It's a good thing we're not allowed to bring guns to work (lol).

I used to attend Calvary Chapel churches, the un-denomination (kinda like 7-Up). I was always bothered by their hyper-sensitivity to Harry Potter and Halloween. For those of you who don't know, Halloween is short for "All Hallows Eve" which happens the night before "All Hallows Day" or better known as "All Saints Day." It has an "Eve" like Christmas has an "Eve." It kinda hearkens at the Jewish roots of the church by getting the celebration going the evening/day before the festival happens on the calendar (since dates turn at midnight). I have yet to read in the Bible where going out dressed up to ask for candy surrenders your soul to satan. It is much more popular to believe today then it was 40 years ago. When my mom and dad were growing up, everyone did stuff on Halloween. I have yet to see them exhibit signs of demon possession. Truth be told, everyone celebrated Halloween when I was a kid, and I turned out just fine from a salvific/theological perspective. I think the church is starting to become hyper-reactionary to things, which isn't good for anyone. It makes us look like fools to the culture (not in the way that the Bible means that the wisdom of God is foolishness to the unsaved) and it becomes another point of contention in the "Us Vs. Them" battle, which detracts from the valid points that already exist (like whether or not there is absolute truth). Paul said some would esteem every day alike and others would esteem one day special over another. The point is to use that perspective to God's glory, not to be divisive. I am still irked whenever I hear someone tell me I should be worshipping on Saturday. I wonder if they ever pick up their Bible. I don't care if they do it Saturday or Sunday (or even Thursday) as long as it is to God's glory, but they don't glorify God for playing the role of judge on already settled matters. So, if you do or don't celebrate Halloween, do or don't to the glory of God, but don't get any ideas that you are any better or holier than someone else. It is just the new pharisaism. I had to unlearn being one of the "don't police" and to allow others to act on their conscience. It's incredible how freeing it is.

Time for today's edition of "Great Blunders In History!"

In 1988 Apple Computer, Inc. hired a small computer company from Virginia called Quantum Computer Services to develop an online service for its customers. It was to be called AppleLink Personal Edition and was set to come out in 1989. But before Quantum could launch the service, Apple changed its mind and terminated the contract. Bad idea. Quantum had negotiated a clause in the contract: If Apple backed out, Quantum got to keep the technology. It launched the service itself in late 1989, with a new name . . . America Online.

What's for sale in the classifieds (for real):

1 man, 7 woman hot tub—$850/offer
Amana washer $100. Owned by clean bachelor who seldom washed.
2 wire mesh butchering gloves, 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, pair: $15
Tickle Me Elmo, still in box, comes with its own 1988 mustang, 5L, excellent condition $6,800
Cows, calves never bred . . . also 1 gay bull for sale.

Well, I think that is about all of the genius I feel coming on today. Behave, and brush your teeth.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

Have You Lived Life? Not 'Til You've Cured Those Hiccups!

2006-10-05T16:58:00.000-07:00

So here's the deal, I stole this off of Liz's blog, and she stole it from someone else. Apparently, being able to check off a number of these (which is done by bolding) tells you that you have really lived life.

HAVE YOU EVER...

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula (my little brother had one as a pet and I had nightmares about that thing getting out. I just wanted to SQUISH IT!!!!)
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game (Oregon State football game)
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment (don't they always come at the worst possible moment?)
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger (it's how Jen and I met)
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking (I still do this in the grocery store to the ridiculous music they play...Jen doesn't like it)
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer (just bought a sweet USB powered 60 Gig external)
40. Visited all 50 states (I bolded exactly half of the alpha-numeric characters because I've hit 25 or 26)
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving (why jump out of a perfectly good working airplane?)
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River (I've done a few others and visited the Snake River for catfishing; I think that qualifies)
82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
83. Gotten flowers for no reason (Jen bought some for me once when we were dating)
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Kissed on the first date
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
92. Buried one/both of your parents (Jen buried her mom at 17 and we buried her sister two and a half years ago)
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
95. Performed in Rocky Horror
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
98. Passed out cold
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over (and it will happen again in the next couple of years)
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds (I've gained over 210 pounds in the last 25 years, does that count?)
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray (maybe in a few years...)
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Helped an animal give birth (I've seen cows give birth to calfs at the dairy farm just up the road from my childhood home)
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears (still planning this one)
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet (we caught and kept a few as kids)
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi (that is different than sashimi)
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language (I do this every day at work with the Japanese people here)
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone’s life

WOW! I ticked off 69 out of all 150. Even compensating for the ego answers (I'd set that handicap at 4), I still ticked off 65 out of 150. Life has had its dull and exciting moments. It all seems like an adventure, looking back on it now.

Potty humor content here, for those of you concerned.

I picked this up from Reuters. It is a snippet from a story on the "Ignobel Prize" a spin of the "Nobel Prize." These awards honor real research that just happens to be on off-beat material. here's the snippet:

Research into stinky feet, a study on the sound of fingernails on a blackboard
and a device that repels teen-agers with an annoying high-pitched hum on
Thursday won IgNobel prizes -- the humorous counterpart to this week's Nobel
prizes.
Other winning research included a U.S. and Israeli team's discovery
that hiccups could be cured with a finger up the rectum and a study into why
woodpeckers do not get headaches.

That is one home remedy that I will not be trying any time soon. That just sounds sick. I can't do that. I avoid certain sensations at all costs.

I'll tickle your funny bones with a few more hilarious videos. Watch, enjoy, and have a good laugh.

Tom couldn't see very well. He used to need glasses, but it is kind of a moot point now.

Pong anyone?

In the words of the Guiness guys, "Brilliant!"

Apparently, this XBox commercial was banned from usage. It makes me sad to think so. What little boy didn't do these sorts of crazy things when he was a kid (and I'm sure there were plenty of girls who did too, my wife included). It just goes to show you what an overly-politically correct society we live in.

Well, I think that's all I've got for today. I'm off to Central Oregon this weekend to do some hiking with my wife and parents.

Have a blessed weekend,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

A Tea for Every Taste

2006-10-05T13:45:00.000-07:00

I have been big on coffee and tea lately. I have been consuming 8 to 10 cups of tea and the equivalent of 2 to 4 cups of coffee a day (in shots of espresso) every day for the last week. I have noticed a significant difference to my overall health in a very positive way. My health feels better overall, and my stomach is feeling better. I've had stomach issues for the better part of the last 8 years, so it is huge for me to feel well in my stomach.

How about tea? Do you know the difference between red, white, green, herb, etc? Well:
Tea is made by steeping processed leaves, buds or twigs of the tea bush Camellia sinensis in hot water for a few minutes. From this bush, all kinds of true tea are made. The most common are green, black and oolong, but white, yellow, and a type of red tea are also made from these leaves. The difference is oxidation. Much like leaving the skins on red wine grapes after they are harvested, how long the tea is allowed to set after being picked and before being dried has an effect on what kind of tea it will be. White tea is baby green tea, which is not allowed to oxidize at all. Oolong is slightly oxidized, some red teas are a little more oxidized, and, finally, black tea is allowed to oxidize the longest. There is such a thing as yellow tea, but I don't know where between green and black it falls. The reason I compare it to red wine grapes is because the oxidation of the leaves causes the creation of tannins, something the fruit of wine grapes get when the skins are left on and the grapes set for a while after harvest. Just like you can make a white wine from red grapes, you can make green or black tea from the same leaf.

Ceylon tea is merely tea that comes from Sri Lanka (formerly known as Ceylon, kinda like Thailand used to be called Siam).

What most of us know of red "tea" here in the states isn't really tea at all, since it doesn't come from the tea plant. The red "tea" is made from the Rooibos plant of the Aspalathus genus, found in the Cedarberg mountains of South Africa. I don't know what it's properties are like, but I am drinking it today because I bought a box of 20 bags on clearance at Safeway for 49 cents a month or so back.

Any tea that goes by "herbal tea" isn't really tea. There has been a movement in the industry to get away from the herbal "tea" moniker, and the term "herbal infusion" is gaining popularity. These "teas" are primarily made from rosehips, chamomile flowers and leaves, or ginseng leaves.

FlipFlopMamma asked if supporting WorldVision and Compassion International counted as what I was talking about. As I am unfamiliar with what these organizations do, I can't say because I really don't know and I despise speculation. Here is what I'm driving at: the main point of choosing a missionary is to be able to provide them with personal support. Jen and I switched from supporting Jews for Jesus to supporting the local missionaries from Jews for Jesus. As we've gotten to know them, we have prayed for them, they've prayed for us, we've been there to offer support during difficult times. We become to them a part of a support structure they would not have if we just wrote checks to Jews for Jesus every month. And wouldn't that be just the easy thing to do? We see Paul and Timothy and Apollos and the other missionaries in the New Testament develop this model for personal support, where giving is more than just putting money in the box at the temple or synagogue. Don't get me wrong, Jen and I give to support our church, and they support missionaries that we often hear about (at least one of ours gets mentioned every Sunday during the service, which is nice). We also support organizations like the Portland Rescue Mission, who helps the homeless find Christ and offers life changing programs to get them off the street and on their feet. But we "own" missionaries because I would argue that it is part of the biblical model for relationships in the church. Having lived with missionary kids (MKs) that grew up on the field, I heard so many stories about how they felt like illegitimate children of the churches that sent them. Their needs and distresses went unnoticed. How can we call ourselves any kind of a family when we let that happen. They are on the front lines preaching Jesus to the unreached, and we, as a church culture, abandon them there. That is why I own missionaries. If a missionary has a critical need that they really need met, and they can get no extra funds from their organization or sending church(es) to meet that need, who will if you don't? Now, I'm not saying that one person or family could just come up with $1000 at the drop of a hat when a missionary needed it, but who would pray that God would provide it, and who will send any extra money if you don't? That is why I am so heavily promoting Niki and Benny on my blog. They are in a situation where they really need more people to come on board and provide. They can't get help from their organization because it doesn't function that way, and they need people to take ownership and "buy" them. So, I challenge you all to dare to be the difference, even to the tune of $5 or $10 a month if that's all you can afford. Many hands make light work in the Kingdom of God. Here is a quote relevant to this issue: "We cannot live only for ourselves. A thousand fibers connect us with our fellow men." - Herman Melville. So, FlipFlopMamma, and everyone else, I'll leave you to judge whether or not it is the same. Like I said, I don't know what those organizations do, and I don't know how you give to them or the people working for them, or...(you get the picture). I just know that the personal relationship with the missionary is what the point is.

I suppose that is all for today. I'm off to go read and do some journaling.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

The Legend of Jared: A Link To the Past

2006-10-04T11:21:00.000-07:00

Being that most of my readers tend to be 30 to 40ish females, primarily moms, I'll explain the title. It is a small attempt at wit. It was the first game in the Zelda franchise to be released for the Super Nintendo back in 1991. You can now move on from that fact and look for the double entendre in today's post.

In many circles, this would get me called a sissy. I was so excited and I couldn't believe I didn't get around to this yesterday, but today I went to Target and picked up the "Platinum Edition" (sounds fancy, but kinda stupid to me) of The Little Mermaid. I still remember going to see that in the movie theater when I was 8. Not Disney's best work, but still a great movie. It ranks right below Beauty and the Beast in my book. I'd say that'd put them at three or four, with Toy Story and Aladdin securely in the top one and two spot, respectively. The voice talent in them just could not be topped. Toy Story is the only one of those movies that doesn't currently belong to mine and Jen's library. My point: call me a sissy, but I loved the movie, and I want to ensure that my kids get to enjoy it too. No insult intended, but I didn't care for many other Disney movies. The princess theme just didn't resonate with me (re: Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty). I think that Beauty and the Beast was different because I found the romance story compelling, along with other elements. Besides, it was a pretty violent movie, and being a male, I am genetically ingrained to like that stuff.

I shelled out some serious dough for a personal journal, but I think it was worth it. I bought one that just the way I behold it makes me feel compelled to fill its pages. I don't plan on being some famous political leader or important thinker of my own time, but I wish I had my great-grandpa Ulrich's (that's pronounced ol-rick) journal. He never kept one. But, he was a great man. He was a prominent figure in the development the of organized educational system in the county in California that my mother grew up in. He was a strong Christian man, and he loved his family. That last sentence there is all I hope to be known for, and I would love to be able to pass that on in my writing as well. So, here's to hoping for success. Besides, recording all of those funny and interesting thoughts I have in my journal will probably translate into more interesting blog postings. It has been forever since I've had to write much by hand (being a child of the computer age), but I'm going to give it a shot.

Today's video clips: The top one is of some of the best hits in NFL history. Being a football fan, I hope you'll indulge me. I love a good, hard, clean hit from the defense. As great as touchdown runs are, the beautiful hits keep me coming back. I love 'em.

This next video is a Mozilla FireFox jokey-type one. I love it, and I have FireFox on my home PCs. So should you.

I think that's about it for today. I will leave you with this question: Do you own a missionary yet?

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

Two Stupid Dogs

2006-10-03T15:41:00.000-07:00

Now the videos of dogs on YouTube tend to involve them doing obscene things, but these gems made me laugh. I thought I'd share them with you all.

I had to kick some hilarity in there. My day and blog are just shouting for the need of it right now.

I must say, I did talk to Niki (of "Niki's Awesome Blog" and "Niki's Other Awesome Blog" that is) today for a good long while. It was the first time we'd ever talked over the phone, even though we've been friends since June. She and Benny are such cool people. It was a kick to listen to her supervise her somewhat rambunctious kids while I was on the phone with her. They are so funny.

I wanted to ask and invite you all to join their support team. They have an awesome ministry to street kids in Denver. They are at a juncture where they need some supporters to come on board and provide where others are dropping off. If you want to know more, get in touch with Niki through one of her blogs.

Permit me a short diatribe: Forgive me for not remembering, but was it the Ephesians who Paul praised for being so insistent and so eager to give? Let us aspire to be like them. Allow me to be their advocate and say, give to Niki and Benny if you have some room in your giving budget, or would be willing to make room by expanding it. A few people giving $25 a month could make a big difference. A few people giving $50 a month would be huge. As God's people, we should be actively involved in the work that missionaries we support are doing, and we should be supporting missionaries as God's people. If you aren't, Niki and Benny would be the perfect couple to get acquainted with this important part of your spiritual life on (yeah, I know, never end a sentence with a preposition). They will blow your preconceived notions of what a missionary is or does away. Amazing, godly people. I'll leave it at this: one of my favorite Bible college professors said, "Everybody should own at least one missionary." The "own" is figurative, of course, but do you "own" a missionary? Do you have a missionary who's personal well-being you "own?" Do you have a missionary whose daily life and work you "own" in your prayers? Do you have a missionary whose birthday, wedding anniversary, kid's birthdays, date of the tragic loss of a parent, etc that you "own?" Adopt a missionary. If you haven't, you're missing out on one of the greatest blessings you could know.

Okay, one last little, something, and if you're all very good, uncle Jared will give you something else to laugh at. But only if you promise to eat your vegetables at dinner tonight.

I have to give props to Starter apparel for using a slightly chubbier than normal, but still very cute and darling 12 year old girl (that looked to be about her age, give or take a year) as the main character in their most recent commercial promoting their college football hoodies. Maybe you've seen it. She's wearing a University of Texas hoodie, supposedly at a spelling bee and has to come up with the proper spelling for "bos taurus" (the type of cow that a longhorn, the UT mascot, is). I don't know if I just notice it more because I'm looking for it, but I feel like I'm beginning to see a lot more people who are representative of what you see in real life represented in commercials. Now, I'm not saying, "Let's all pull out the Cheetos and Mountain Dew and just sit on the couch all day." I am happy to see a more positive impression being given about people who have bodies more common to what you would see in real life. We aren't all supermodels, nor should we be. We always like to talk about how ethnic diversity is so enriching, but everybody says they wish they had a supermodel figure when it comes to body type. That makes me mad! My wife has wide hips and a "larger than average nose" (according to some people in our culture), and I love both of those things about her. If you really want acceptance of different body types and want to promote people, especially teenagers, to have a healthy body image, then quit talking about how much you had a figure other than your own and be grateful for what God made you as! Don't despise the work of the Creator. He certainly doesn't. He thought you were amazing when He made you, so I ask, "Dare you disagree with God?"

So love yourself for what God made you to be. And don't be a hypocrite by saying you wished that you looked like a supermodel and then tell others that they are beautiful if they don't look like supermodels. Even supermodels have things they hate about their bodies. The grass is always greener, right? I say it again, don't despise God's handiwork.

Now here's your funny video for behaving. You should watch it all the way through. It's hilarious.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

A Case of the Mondays

2006-10-02T11:46:00.000-07:00

That was one of the many great lines from the movie Office Space. That gal really got under my skin, but it was hilarious the way she did it. Anyway, on to something that isn't more important...

My blog posts have been a little lacking lately in the humor department. I'll have to talk to the editor I hired to cover that and see if I can't light a fire under him. They guy works for daily rations of half a box of Cheez-its (and the plain cheaper ones too, not the fufu-y spendy kind) and a cup of herbal tea. He told me he used to be the editor for the Saturday Evening Post, the LA Times, and the Chicago Sun, but I'm beginning to become suspicious of that claim. I may have to evict him from the closet I let him sleep in here at work if I don't see some action soon.

Someone asked me in a comment on my last post why I always feel lonely. Well, I spend the vast majority of my day in complete solitude. It is a rare occasion that anyone wanders in to do anything more than get a uniform, which is a 15 second entry to exit transaction. I work 11am to 7:30pm, so I don't see Jen a ton, but I do see her some. I have incredibly extroverted tendencies, so it has been difficult. Top that off with attempting to rebuild a social life after having no time for one over the last 2 years due to school, and it has been a difficult road. I haven't been getting much email from anyone lately, so I have felt lonelier. I am working on some books, like The Practice of the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence to help. It is some, but man cannot live without fellowship, which is what has been the issue for me. God has provided some light for me at work, but it is kinda sporadic. I am just trying to learn to thrive, rather than just survive, in the current circumstances. I could definitely use some prayer on that. Speaking of which...

I want to remind you all to please pray for my blog buddies, if you haven't been.
- Especially Dustin. He is going through some extremely stressful times at work. I used to work in the office he is currently Assistant Site Manager of, and I was stressed out just being a peon there. He is suffering from stomach maladies brought on by stress, so he needs lots of prayers all around.
- Please be praying for Liz, as she is moving into a more stressful period of transitioning into home schooling mode. Tough times on that account, but you should be reading her recent blog posts on that. It will save me from insufficiently attempting to rehash everything that has gone on.
- Please be praying for Kiersten. I can not share details of the situation, but please be praying that God would be blessing her and her family at this time.
- Please be praying for Susan, as she is amidst some really exciting times of her writing career. She needs strength and creativity right now as she works on projects to submit to publishers, and please pray that her creation, A Night of Rest, which she is posting a new chapter of every Friday on her blog, would find a publisher, because it certainly deserves one. Go read it!
- Please be praying for Justin. He is a pastor at a church in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. Pastors always need prayer.
- Please be praying for Niki. She has been ill and slow to get better. Also, please be praying for wisdom for her and her family as they make some long-term decisions over the next year.
- Please be praying for Soph as her husband continues his fight to overcome an addiction to pornography. She is expecting their third child soon. If you haven't been dropping by to share an encouraging word, you should.
- My wife isn't a blog buddy (she doesn't have a blog), but she sure could use some prayer right now. She has had this recurring illness for the last year that her doctors have sat on their thumbs about. She finally found one that is willing to look at the whole spectrum of issues she is having and to help her find a permanent solution as opposed to treating the symptoms whenever she comes in. I always call her my "sick chick" when she isn't feeling well. She thinks it's cute.

And read this. It has honestly changed my perspective on everything. My life will never be the same because of it, and I am thankful. I will worry about so many things much, much less because of it. It is a bit long, but John Stossel tells you why just about everything you know is wrong. I'm outraged at the lies I have been led to believe. Read it and buy his book. I will. I have always like him, but Stossel is my new favorite journalist. Something else he did recently was debunk the "Supersize Me" premise. Looking at all of the other restaurants that are out there, if you ate from their normal fare for 30 days, you would gain as much as that dude did eating at McDonald's for 30 days. But it is just so easy to hate McDonald's whether or not they are "guilty," isn't it? BTW, many thanks to DaPoppins, who has no clue that I even exist, for the link to the article.

So I'll post this and start eating Cheez-its in anticipation of the inevitable, tomorrow. As much as I like Tito Sanchez, I'm probably going to have to fire him. So here is your comedic gold for the day:

Q: What's an Undecennial?
A: An 11TH anniversary.

MISNOMERS
- The rare red coral of the Mediterranean is actually blue.
- The gray whale is actually black.
- Heartburn is actually pyrosis, caused by the presence of gastric secretions, called reflux, in the lower esophagus.
- A steel-jacketed bullet is actually jacketed with copper.
- The Caspian Sea and the Dead Sea are both actually lakes.

A pretty funny story from the Cleveland Plains Dealer a couple of years back:
Cleveland Indians pitcher Kyle Denney survived a random gunshot on Sept. 29, 2004, fired at the bus taking him and his teammates to the airport in Kansas City after a game. The bullet hit Denney's right calf but did not penetrate deeply and was immediately removed by the team trainer. The bullet might have gone deeper except that Denney had on high plastic boots as part of the cheerleader's uniform he was wearing. (In end-of-season rituals, rookies like Denney are often forced by their teammates to wear ridiculous outfits.)"

How about this one: Odds that a grain of rice grown in the U.S. will end up being brewed into beer: 1 in 10. You might think this weird, but consider this. Anheuser-Busch (makers of Budweiser and Busch beer, among many others) produces 12% of all the beer consumed worldwide. Budweiser is made with rice, a recipe alteration that occurred during World War II when barley shortage was an issue. They substituted rice for some of the barley, which didn't add much flavor but did add some and boosted the body (viscosity) of the beer. They never changed it back after the war. Now, if you don't think that would be kosher, beer is an undistilled, alcoholic brew made from cereal grains. That is why rice wine is an oxymoron. Anything made from rice, is beer. Sake (pronounced "saw-kay" in Japan and commonly "sockee" in the US) is a beer, not wine made from ricein spitete of it's generally higher alcohol content.

How about another grain related fact? Maintenance workers on the Empire State Building in New York City were complaining of being pelted by small pellets when working at higher altitudes on the outside of the building. It was just recently discovered that these pellets were small pieces of barley that were blown in from Midwesterwind stormsms. Hows about that, huh?

Some great quotes from political leaders:
- "I intend to open this country up to democracy, and anyone who is against that, I will jail!"
President Joao Baptiste Figueiredo, Brazil

- "We're going to move left and right at the same time."
Former California Governor Jerry Brown

- "Facts are stupid things."
Ronald Reagan

- "The only way we'll ever get a voluntary army is to draft them."
Chairman of the House Committee on Armed Services F. Edward Herbert

- "Sixty years of progress, without change."
Saudi government's anniversary slogan

The Saudi one just screams the truth. We pretend there's been progress, but there's really been little change to speak of. I completely agree with Ronald Reagan's comment. "Facts" can be twisted to say or "prove" anything. It is only in the context of the story that facts are told in that they constitute anything that resembles the truth. And after reading that John Stossel report, you will know that.

Most of my regulars will know that I fancy few things French, but here is a good one:

Sabotage

Meaning: To deliberately destroy or obstruct

Origin: French peasants used to wear big wooden shoes known as sabots, but contrary to popular belief, these are not the same sabots that gave us "sabotage." Sabot was also the term for a clamp that held a piece of metal in place. The word first appeared during the French railway strikes of 1910, referring to the practice of workers cutting the sabots that kept the railroad tracks bound together.

I might say "car-hold" rather than garage until the day I die (LOL), but saying sabotage is easier than "to deliberately destroy or obstruct."

If you're French (or French Canadian) and you're reading this, I don't really dislike you. Your politicians (past and present) just make your people an easy target.

Here's an incredible fact: Over 6 billion copies of the Bible have been sold worldwide. The Word of the Lord is not and never will be silenced!

Well, I think I've gone a bit long.

Blessings,

Big J

PS, check this bad boy out! They got the right idea!

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

More of a Good Thing

2006-09-29T14:32:00.000-07:00

More on FREE HUGS today. Just yesterday, this video of a news story on Juan Mann was posted to youtube. I was a bit overwhelmed by the intensity of the feelings of those who posted responses to yesterday's post (if you are visiting for the first time, go back and watch the video). I was a little surprised by them, but I suppose I shouldn't have been. It brought me to tears, too. I don't listen to rock of any sort very much anymore, but I am definitely thinking of picking up the Sick Puppies album, or at least that song. Paired with the video, it sends such a strong message. I love seeing people reaching out in love for the sake of love. I wish something like this was going on where I live.

Maybe it's just me, but I think there is some significance in Juan Mann's name. It goes to show you that Juan Mann can make a difference. Amen?

I have been visited by several encouraging angels from the Lord today. He has truly blessed me through them. I may be pretty lonely most days, but the Lord hasn't forgotten where I am. Bless His holy name.

Have a blessed weekend,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

Free Hugs?

2006-09-28T12:00:00.000-07:00

Before I forget, I want to introduce you all to my new blog buddy, Kathy. She is also from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, like Justin. I really connect with her personal reflections, which make up most of her blog posts. She is a very deep and very real person, the kind I truly value as a friend in real life. Stop by to say hello and offer her some encouragement. Tell her you found her through me.

Now, on with the show...

Don't expect anything more than some general randomness from me today. I hope to make it interesting.

First up is Free Hugs. Juan Mann is a guy who lives in Australia. In this age of social disconnect, he just wanted to give people a free hug. The local authorities tried to put a stop to his sweeping campaign that started with just one man holding a sign offering "FREE HUGS." What happened was powerful. Watch the video and see for yourself.

If I could, I would give Mr. Mann a big hug. How about this as a controversial way to offer the love of Jesus Christ to those who simply need to be reached out to? How about this as a way to offer young men and women a way out of the siren song of homosexuality. I have a personal testimony in this area, but that is for another day.

In honor of FlipFlop(cheaterpants)Momma, she was correct. It was General George Meade. He wasn't a bad general either. Grant hit a point where he was proving incredibly more effective, though, so he was put in command. Grant was a great general. As was William Tecumseh Sherman. It is sad that Sherman is so over-shadowed by Grant and Lee. Truth be told, Sherman may have been the most brilliant of them all, depending on how you look at it. Lee could out maneuver and out-think any opponent. Grant was an excellent general, and I think would have surrendered sooner than Lee had if circumstances had been the inverse. Sherman knew exactly what it would take to win the war. His march through the south is still remembered to this day by many southerners with still a sense of bitterness. He was quite kind to the civilians, but he burnt every major town from Atlanta to Savannah to Columbia, SC to the ground. Whatever food his men could not eat was burned or animals slaughtered. I love one of his quotes where he says something to the effect of "It is good that war is such a horrible thing that we might not grow too fond of it." Yet, he was able to balance his perspective. He also said, "War is the remedy our enemies have chosen, and I say give them all they want." I could go on and on, but I won't.

Oh, and the Battle of Gettysburg was fought because the Army of Northern Virginia wandered north to try to bring war to us and terrorize the Union civilians and turn the tide of national opinion against the war. Lee's army was camped outside Gettysburg with the intention of seizing the finished goods of the local shoe factory when Meade caught up with him. That is why that battle was fought there.

Hugo Chavez is here in the US for the 61st annual UN General Assembly in New York. The guy is a Cretan and a man who peddles the words of the precious Gospel to further his own objectives of hatred and war as cloaked in false pretenses of peace and equality. He spoke at a church in New York where he lashed out at president Bush with ferocity and then tied in a few mis-applied and completely out of context verses from the Bible. He was introduced by Danny Glover who embraced him before his speech. That is pretty sad. I used to respect Danny Glover. I used to respect Wil Smith too, I suppose. What is wrong with these people?

I finally have the Social Security Benefits Planner certification monkey off my back (hooray!!). I'm in cruise control for a few days while I recover from that and let my ears recover from their pain. I have narrow ear canals that are very sensitive. I have to wear ear plugs when I sleep. When I don't, I don't sleep well. So I am just cruisin' right now, trying to do a decent job at stuff while phoning it in as much as possible without compromising my ethics. I'm just working to get by. Oh well.

I suppose I'm off for the day.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

Who's In Charge Around Here?

2006-09-26T11:46:00.000-07:00

Well, I haven't felt much myself lately, on top of being busy with some work projects, so my time (and energy) for blogging has been seriously diminished. I put a lot of work into this blog. Maybe it doesn't look like it, but every post takes a couple of hours on average to complete. I just haven't had that in me lately.

I have been watching Ken Burn's documentary on the Civil War. It glosses over some incredibly important and interesting details, but I suppose he had to keep it to the 13 hour limit. Aside from having some revisionist history inserted about the slavery-war situation, I am really enjoying it. One of the contributing historians was the great Shelby Foote. He wrote a three volume history on the Civil War, which I will likely be picking up. I am learning so much about the Civil War I never knew, and was never taught in school. I will be having my kids learn history by any means but a text book when they are in school. What a waste of time reading facts about history that will quickly be forgotten. Facts do not equal truth, anyhow. It is how the facts are tied together with story and perspective that give one what the truth is. I think Jesus demonstrated that well.

How about another history question that no one will dare to touch with a ten foot pole? Who was the general in command (in charge, hence the post title) of all the Union forces at Gettysburg? If you want to be a real genius, you can throw in what the Battle of Gettysburg was fought over.

Blessings,

Jared

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

I Stole This Shirt

2006-09-22T13:27:00.000-07:00

Well, not exactly, but I did steal this very cute and funny story from Liz, who stole it from elsewhere. Thanks Liz.

The Way It All Began

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com, did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot . And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she had been called Amazon Dot Com.

She said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why doth thou travel far from town to town with thy goods when thou can trade without ever leaving thy tent?" And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, Dear?"

And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale and they will reply telling you which hath the best price. And the sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. The drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever moving from his tent. But this success did arouse envy.

A man named Maccabia did secret himself inside Abraham's drum and was accused of insider trading. And the young man did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Siderites, or NERDS for short.

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums, that no one noticed that the real riches were going to the drum maker, one Brother William of Gates, who bought up every drum company in the land. And indeed did insist on making drums that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.

Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others." And as Abraham looked out over the Ezekiel Bay, or as it came to be known "eBay" he said, "we need a name that reflects what we are," and Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."
"YAHOO", said Abraham. And that is how it all began. It wasn't Al Gore after all. But, then again, we all knew that anyway.

How about some semi-recent news updates that are important, some interesting, some funny?

THE POOP ON THE SCOOP THAT KEEPS YOU IN THE LOOP

If you only read one or two, read this one about a real life "roaming gnome." It is hilarious.

And go to this one, too. It is pretty appalling. They love polarization and slander.

Village elders order trial by boiling oil. Just be glad you don't live near there.

Mad herds flood Tokyo restaurants for US beef. We knew they'd come running back to us.

Cheater-pants Hungarian Premier admits to lying about national finances to win election. He's belongs to the socialist party. I will say no more.

Cell phone traffic tracking may soon provide faster routes for drivers with GPS direction services on cell phones. Wouldn't that be sweet to those of us who live in overcrowded areas?

A shark recently discovered in the East Indies walks on its fins on the ocean floor. God has a sense of humor. Not to mention they discovered a shrimp that looks like a Praying Mantis. Cool, huh?

Jesus in beer foam. Some are outraged, others think it is an interesting concept. I think it is worth some real thought.

I would encourage you to read a story before you comment on anything I have commented concerning the story. You need context to understand my comment. I have tried hard to include more video stories, but these are all in print. They are really worth a look though.

Have a good weekend everybody.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

Burninating Your Thursday

2006-09-21T12:00:00.000-07:00

It is no secret that I am a fan of Homestar Runner. I have peppered the occasional post and comments on other's blogs with references to the website and the creative stuff they do. Well, if you know Trogdor The Burninator, then you have got to get this for the "teeniest tiniest of babies" in your life. It is way too cute. I'm buying in advance for "my childrens."

The local paper is called the Vancouver Columbian, and it is really only suitable for wrapping dead fish. Well, that might be too high of a compliment. They have some good pieces on occasion, but they are usually not written locally, but from the AP or something of the like. They are so liberal (and stupid) that I can't stand to read most of what's in the paper. I buy it on occasion, but only for the Bi-Mart ads. Bi-Mart is like a sportsman's version of Wal-Mart, but about 1/10 the size of Wal-Mart. They have an electronics section with a decent selection, and they sell dry goods, beer, and wine. They carry small kitchen appliances and housewares. They also have a pharmacy and even a section with board games and kids toys. But most of the store is dedicated to hunting, fishing, landscaping, and automotive. I love that place. If only I could live there. Anyway, (getting back to the story) I bought the paper last Thursday so I could read the Bi-Mart ads. The cover story is "Alleged Drug Ring Arrested." Let's see, you bust a bunch a people with a ton of drugs in their house, which they were obviously all aware of, and they are an "alleged" drug ring? Real geniuses on the loose here in local journalism. Of course, that would fall on the editor's shoulders, not necessarily the author of the article. You just wonder what is wrong with this country when a bunch of people are caught with a bunch of dope and you can't even call them drug runners. No, no: they're "alleged" drug runners.

I've been using the guest restroom at work lately. It may seem a little pathetic and inane, but around here, it is something. It is like having my own private bathroom that no one uses. The only other ones close by are production area restrooms, and I won't tell you what they look or smell like. It is a special blessing and pleasure to have a clean and tidy bathroom to use.

Here is yet another piece on skinny models. It is a video report from Reuters about the French modeling industry responding to what happened in Madrid. I am actually beginning to feel as if there might be some sense of victory nearby. However, I am not so naive to think that such steps will solve the problem. It is a small amount of headway though. And maybe, just maybe, it will have a trickle down effect. We can always hope.

Here's an inspiring report on the prosthesis community. There are some outrageously cool video clips on it, one being of a working, robotic prosthetic limb made from LEGO Technic parts. You must see it!

How about some cool facts and funny stories to get you over that mid-week slump?

Revenge!

In November 2002, Detroit Free Press columnist Mike Wendland wrote a story about a man named Alan Ralsky, who had become a multimillionaire through marketing spam on the Internet—his company sent up to 250 million e-mails a day. The story told readers of Ralsky’s new 8,000-square-foot $740,000 home.
A group of spam haters posted Ralsky’s home address on hundreds of Web sites, starting an avalanche of junk mail in his mailbox. Then they posted his e-mail address and phone number and he got inundated with the very thing he’d made his millions from—spam.

Strange Headlines from around the world:

Psychics Predict World Didn’t End Yesterday (These psychics wouldn't be French, would they?) Chicago Checking on Elderly in Heat (You can't tell me they're worried about reproductive issues at that age)
High-Speed Train Could Reach Valley in Five Years (That is one slow high-speed train)
Suicide Bomber Strikes Again (Back from the dead?!)
Marijuana Issue Sent to Joint Committee (I wonder if they will approve legalization after the first or second hit?)
Girl Kicked by Horse Upgraded to Stable (Where were they keeping her before?)
Sun or Rain Expected Today, Dark Tonight (You don't say!)
Here's How You Can Lick Doberman's Leg Sores (ewww)

Brazilian sports fans are so rowdy that many of the country's soccer fields are surrounded by moats. Now those are fanatics!

A salute to the rubber ducky, America's favorite bath toy: This bright yellow bath pal first appeared in the mid-1800s when the New York Rubber Company started manufacturing rubber squeak toys. But it would be more than 100 years before rubber duckies became popular. Who do we have to thank for that? The Muppets. In 1970 Ernie sang the song “Rubber Ducky” on Sesame Street . . . and suddenly every kid wanted one.

The earliest use of "the flashback" in western literature was Homer's Odyssey. I love facts like this. They make me feel smarter.

Some quotes about America's best friend, the TV:

- “TV is chewing gum for the eyes.”—Frank Lloyd Wright

-“The remarkable thing about television is that it permits several million people to laugh at the same joke and still feel lonely.”—T. S. Eliot

-“Men don’t care what’s on. They only care what else is on.”—Jerry Seinfeld, on remote controls

-“Seeing a murder on television can help work off one’s antagonisms. And if you haven’t any antagonisms, the commercials will give you some.”—Alfred Hitchcock

Speaking of TV: It cost $647,000 per minute of film to make Terminator 2. It almost seems like it should be illegal. I won't make enough to pay for a minute over the first 15 years of my adult life, and that doesn't even account for inflation!!!

For some "stately" trivia: Herbert Hoover was the first president to put a phone in the White House, which happened in 1929. No, it wasn't the "Bat Phone." It was your average telephone.

Going a little further back: In 1924, a new Ford cost $265. So how much did you pay for your last new car?

Going much further backward: From 1790 to 1800, the capital of the United States was Philadelphia, PA. Anyone hazard a guess at what it was before that?

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

Second Post

2006-09-20T14:54:00.000-07:00

Feeling a bit better and lighter in heart, I am posting again with some stuff that should be a bit more joyful and interesting in nature.

Re: what Kiersten said, I was disturbed by what seemed to be a complete lack of knowledge about who the historically significant John Locke was. Just another reason I don't want to send my children to school, but to do so at home. What is sad is that I have learned so much more from watching documentaries on the History Channel than I ever did in history or geography class at school. Can you hear me as a dad? "Sit still, keep quiet and watch that TV or you'll go to your room!" What kid wouldn't want to hear that? (LOL) I am already picking up books I will be having them read when they get older.

I won't be watching Lost or Grey's Anatomy or any other show. I think my life had enough drama in it during my teen years. Those shows just don't appeal to me. Admittedly, I used to be a Gilmore Girls addict. I got sick of it though. They just keep rehashing the same story-line with different faces. It gets old after a while. Besides, it was when I was on swing-shift, and what else was I to do when I crawled out of bed at 10:30am when they weren't playing SportsCenter on ESPN? I need more laughter, not drama in my life. Anyway, I have seen the commercials for the season premiere of Grey's Anatomy, and the only panties I am interested in are the ones my wife wears. I don't pass judgment on those who want to watch it; that's just how I feel.

I am, however, watching The Contender to my boxing loving heart's delight. They had the semi-finals on Tuesday. I only caught the first bout, and I'll catch the second half of the episode on Friday. A shorter, smaller, lighter Steve Forbes out-boxed the ox of a man that is Cornelius "K9" Bundrage (yes, I spelled it right). It was an exhilarating fight! I absolutely loved every second of it. I had to restrain myself, being an apartment dweller, because I was cheering along with the crowd and shouting at the boxers. I am sure I was a sight to be seen. It was so sweet, though. I have loved it because these guys are fighting for a chance to make it big, so they box with all of their hearts and don't pussy-foot around in the ring. I wish there was more boxing here in the Portland area. We just have very hokey "professional" wrestling. Calling it "very hokey" is a compliment.

Well, it finally happened. I left my yogurt out too long and it was cheese by the time I got to it. I often forget to put it in the fridge at work for up to 2 hours after I get there. I didn't violate that time restriction today, I guess strawberry yogurt is just a little more sensitive than peach. I have seen chevre cheese mixed with fruit, for those of you who will write me and tell me that I am disgusting. My life is just weird, no apologies offered.

If you haven't seen this commercial, you have to now! Here's your chance.

Too funny, huh?

Here is a video story to serve as a follow-up to my last post on skinny models in Madrid. It is by CNN, who I despise, but Jeannie Moost does it justice. She was the one tolerable reporter I felt that they had. It is good, you should see it.

I think I'll terminate this post here.

Blessings,

Big J

Requests For Prayer

2006-09-20T11:37:00.000-07:00

Where did everyone go? No comments?! Ouch. I never said that Lost was a bad show, just that I don't watch it. Was my last post really that bad?

Well, I hope that someone crosses this today, because I have a few serious items before I get to my usual sillyness. It feels inappropriate to blog anything silly or fun today, so I will keep it short, and save other stuff for tomorrow. My first piece is somber news. Ellen Swope was declared brain dead early this morning. It is a real loss for Jen and I. We knew her as "Nurse Ellen" there at Multnomah Bible College. We held out hope that God might heal her. She held on for a week and a half of ups and downs. We learned that it would likely be a total loss on Monday and have just been waiting for the end. Now she stands in the presence of her Savior. I pray that she is rejoicing in the lavish surroundings that the fruit from this life should bring her in the next. We love you, Ellen. We will miss you. May you intercede in the presence of the Father for those you left behind. And may you eternally rejoice that there you need to find a new field in which to serve our Lord. Please pray for her husband, Steve, and her sons, Ian and Colin, as well as the siblings, grandchildren and other relatives she left behind.

The second I ask because I got nuthin' on comments from yesterday, except a request from Liz St. Cyr (aka Looney Mom, aka LooneyBin4Sure) to pray for her daughter. Please go over to her blog to find out what is going on and how you can pray for her and her family.

That's all today.

I know I don't print stuff in King James English, but it is how I learned this, and it just seems appropriate today.

"He giveth and He taketh away. Blessed be the name of the Lord."

Blessings,

Jared

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

A History Lesson

2006-09-19T13:24:00.000-07:00

All right kiddies, gather 'round for a lesson in history. I hope I'm doing this for nothing, but I found yesterday's comments a little disturbing (not the ones about coffee).

John Locke, 1632 - 1704, English philosopher, founder of British empiricism. Locke summed up the Enlightenment in his belief in the middle class and its right to freedom of conscience and right to property, in his faith in science, and in his confidence in the goodness of humanity. His influence upon philosophy and political theory has been incalculable. He is best known for authoring his Essay on Human Understanding and Two Treatises on Civil Government. He is best known for his statement that man is entitled to life, liberty, and private property; a saying that the Declaration of Independence got its inspiration for its life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. He is also known for saying "the government which governs best, governs least." We owe to him all the ideas that we hold dear in the founding of our democracy.

I hate to burst anyone's bubble, but I have actually never even seen part of an episode of "Lost." It just isn't my cup of tea. I have never seen an episode of CSI:anything, 24, Law & Order, NCIS, Veronica Mars... Those kind of shows just don't do anything for me. Part of what makes me me is my love of sports and cartoons (the funny kind on Cartoon Network and the like, not the twisted adult kind you find on Comedy Central). I'm a simple guy who likes simple pleasures, and when I sit down to be entertained, I often just want a good laugh. Or I like to learn, so I often watch the History Channel and Food Network, too. Sorry to disappoint anyone. If it counts for anything, I am currently watching the Amazing Race. I love to see all the imagery from the different countries people travel to.

Speaking of the Food Network, I absolutely love Good Eats with Alton Brown (pronounced al-tun like the name "Al," not awl-tun). The guy is just ageniuss. He brings you the "why" of how food works, as opposed to merely the "how" to cook eggs benedict. As opposed to Emeril (who is really loud and annoying) who teaches you how to make super "kicked-up" or "fufu" type food, Alton just wants you to know how to make better scrambled eggs, or even a good fruit cake (there really is such a thing). He figures you're smart enough to take it from there and create your own variations that will turn into family favorites you can hand down for generations. He is leading a new kind of food revolution for home cookin' in America. He talks the science of food, as well as it's history (he has a nutritional anthropologist on his show as a regular feature), and he adds just a dash of pop culture to make it fun. He references authors from Hemingway to Melville with a wit and wisdom that is uncommon. And you know that he has to be somewhat of a quirky weirdo in real life. People with so much common sense who are well versed in history and literature just are. But that's okay, I'm one too, and he's my kind of quirky weirdo.

Speaking of Melville, about a decade ago, the US Forest Service made a move to attempt to change the name of "Smokey the Bear" to just "Smokey Bear." Honestly, either still sounds likemascotott for RJ Reynolds if you ask me. But, he has always been "Smokey the Bear" ever since the Teddy Roosevelt incident that birthed him. The USFS played a particular radio commercial almost constantly for seemingly months to try to make us Americans change our mind and think it was always "Smokey Bear" not "Smokey the Bear." I appreciate all the credit they give us in spite of their advertising "Smokey the Bear" for over fifty years and him "bearing" (chuckle, chuckle...huh, hu...never mind) the name for nearly a century. The commercial would say, "You wouldn't say 'Easter "the" Bunny' or 'Santa "the" Claus.'" One day as we were riding along somewhere in the famijalopyopy listening to the radio, my little brother blurted out after that shpeel "Moby 'the' "Dick" to which immediately we all burst into laughter. I still laugh every time I recall it. Not only is it a memory of better days with him, but it is so true. Stupidity is rampant in our country in the form of politiccorrectnessess. It is nice to be able to laugh at it and life, and know that there is still hope for our country.

I'm gonna do a little meme that you can play along with if you wish. I picked it up...somewhere. I don't remember exactly now, but if that person happens to run across my blog, thanks for the idea.

Grab the book closest to you
Open to page 123
Scroll down to the 5th sentence
Post the text of next 3 sentences on your blog
Name of the book and the author

The excise seemed particularly unfair to inland settlers because it applied to liquor as it left the still, not at the point of sale. This meant that whiskey produced for private consumption or barter was still subject to excise. Furthermore, many of the settlers had come to America to get away from revenue collectors and government interference.

A History of the World in 6 Glasses, Tom Standage.

Anyone hazard a guess to what historical event this led to under what government?

That's it for today.

Blessings,

Jared

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

Prayer Requests & Some News

2006-09-18T16:07:00.000-07:00

Before anything, I ask for prayers for Ellen Swope and her family. Ellen is a kind woman who bears the mark of a life redeemed by Jesus. She has been campus nurse at Multnomah Bible College for a good long while. She is in her late 50's or early 60's. Well, the weekend before last, she had a brain anuerysm suddenly while serving in her job at the school's annual retreat. She has been back and forth all week, and now it looks as if she will not make it. Here is the latest update from the Vice-President at Multnomah, Dr. Wayne Strickland.

God is in the process of taking Ellen home ot be with her. The doctors have decided that her brain stem is dead and that the only thing keeping her alive is the shunt in her brain and the ventilator. Steve has decided to instruct the Drs. to remove the shunt from Ellen's brainwhich is draining the excess blood that keeps building up due to the linkageor aneurysm. The MRI was inconclusive about location or nature of the blood flow. There is plenty of clotting as well. The Drs. have told him she isvirtually brain dead, with serious compromise of the brain stem area. Removing the shunt will accelerate the process of her dying. We don't know how long that will actually take; death is inevitable outside of God's intervention, but we don't know what it will look like and how how long it will take. Dr. Tien (the neuro-specialist) plans to come in around noon andremove the shunt himself. He has said her death may be fairly quick or coulddrag on for days.

Ellen is an "Organ Donor" so Steve wants to try to preserve as many of herbody organs for effective use as possible, so for now, she will remain on aventilator and other life support systems. There may be a time when adecision might need to be made concerning removing life-support systems if her life lingers on too long. I think this decision will be even harder to make.

The boys, Colin and Ian (and Ian's family,Claire and Titus) are driving downagain this afternoon (the boys were just here over the weekend.) The familywill get to say "good-bye" and be together tonight. Steve seems to be copingwell with the situation and is accepting God's choosing to take his wife hometo be with Him.Please be in prayer for Steve and his sons as they say "good-bye" to theirbeloved family member!

Ellen is one of the most beautiful saints of God I have ever met on this earth. She always ministered with love and grace wherever she was. I didn't know her extremely well, but she loved me whenever she was near me. No one is perfect, but Ellen was working on that. Now, short of God's divine intervention, she will shortly be perfected. Please pray that God will miraculously intervene. This family has lived through many exceedingly difficult trials over the last several years. And please pray for the peace and the comfort of the Lord to be with Ellen and her family. Jen has worked with her to some extent for the last 3 years, and it is hard on her to lose another. She is standing strong and being a shoulder for others to cry on, but I hurt for how this effects her, too. Also, Multnomah lost a faculty member just before the school year started to an open confession of pornography/sex addiction. It was handled very excellently and in a godly manner by the faculty member who is repentant and seeking the Lord (and has vacated his position for healing) and by the college. It just seems to be a rough year.

Please also remember Sergey. See Friday's post for that.

Now for something on the lighter side.

This little piggy didn't go to market. You must read this short news article. It is totally freakin' hilarious.

Also, this one goes to show you that you can lead a horse to water, and its relatives will still try to sue you or defame you publicly if it chooses of its own free will to die of dehydration.

Here's a follow up to the story I posted a week or two ago on the Madrid fashion show.

Fashion boss rejects bid to ban thin modelsMon Sep 18, 2006 07:44 AM ET
By Paul Majendie

LONDON (Reuters) - One of the main backers of London Fashion Week Sunday rejected British government calls for a ban on wafer-thin models as the fashion industry faced a furor over its catwalks.

"Outright bans and indeed legislation is definitely not a route we want to go down," said Marks and Spencer chief executive Stuart Rose, who is chairman of the British Fashion Council that is organizing the event which starts Monday.

He was responding to a plea from Culture Secretary Tessa Jowell for London to follow Madrid's example and ban skinny models.

Madrid fashion organizers have taken the unprecedented step of rejecting underweight women, saying they wanted to project an image of beauty and health -- not a waif-like look.
The new Spanish rules say models with a body mass index (BMI) -- a ratio of height to weight -- below 18 are not allowed to appear at the shows.

Urging London to follow Madrid's example, Jowell said "The fashion industry's promotion of beauty as meaning stick thin is damaging to young girls' self-image and to their health.
"The fashion industry is hugely powerful in shaping the attitude of teenage girls and their feelings about themselves," she said in a statement.

Rejecting her call, Rose said "Are we going to ask people to walk through detectors for BMI and say I'm sorry you're rejected? That would be quite difficult."
"Body Mass is just an indication," he told Sky News. "It is just a guide. You cannot use it as an absolute."

"We just need to be reasonable, educate people, give them the facts and let them make up their own minds," Rose said.

But the move to ban skinny models could well gather momentum across the fashion world.
The mayor of Milan, Letizia Moratti, has said she will seek a similar ban for Milan Fashion Week -- starting in a week's time -- unless it can find a solution to "sick" looking models.
Fearing they could be targeted next, Milan model agency boss Riccardo Gay said "With those kind of rules, we'd have to turn away 80 percent of models. Naomi Campbell wouldn't be able to walk down the catwalk." (Jared's comment: anyone think that maybe Naomi Campbell should gain some weight then?)

After Madrid's shock ban, Cathy Gould of New York's Elite modeling agency said the fashion industry was being used as scapegoat for illnesses like anorexia and bulimia.
But supporters of the ban were joined by Harry Potter author JK Rowling who told London's Evening Standard she did not want her children to grow up to be "empty-headed, self-obsessed clones."

I am a big John Locke fan. His philosophy was "The government that governs best governs least." I totally agree. I think something needs to be done, though. I am not comfortable with the image supermodels and the fashion industry portray. I think it is time to change it. I hate to suggest the government step in here, but I think it is no more a violation of free speech than censoring porn mags would be.

Just trying to do my job. Intrepidly trotting the globe for the scoop on the poop that keeps you in the loop.

Oh, and my coffee was delicious this morning. Nuthin' like chikin 't all.

Well, time to roll.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

Semi-random Friday

2006-09-15T12:36:00.000-07:00

Today is random Friday. How about some random ramblings on different stuff? I promise to attempt to make it interesting. Allow me to say, if you read nothing else, skip to the bottom section, follow the link, and take action.

So PETA says that Steve Irwin had it coming. Really classy, huh? It didn't take them long to pee on an internationally beloved man and good man's grave. Read this story for a peek at the kind of man that Steve Irwin really was. It is so easy for all of us to take pot shots and say things like "You can only dance with the devil for so long." Do we criticize people who volunteer to fight in Iraq or Afghanistan? Do we criticize missionaries going into places they are not likely to withdraw from alive? Does anyone ever criticize Nate Saint or Jim Elliot by saying they should have chosen to evangelize to a tribe that was less dangerous? Now, I am not equating being a naturalist/environmentalist with the work of soul winning, but there are some correlations between what Steve Irwin did and what Nate Saint/Jim Elliot did. First, they died doing what they loved, which involved doing something inherently dangerous. Some jobs are more inherently dangerous than others (coal mining, logging, green chain pulling, electric line technician). Not only that, it was really a freak accident. I think they have only recorded 3 deaths by a sting ray in Austrailian history. That goes back over 300 years. One per century is a freak accident. Golfers have a massively greater chance of dying by being struck by lightning. Secondly, they lived their dreams. How many of us do that? They were bold enough to seize the moment when the opportunity was there, and they worked hard to create that opportunity. That deserves a lot of respect. I certainly will miss the much beloved "Crocodile Hunter." Steve Irwin deserves our admiration post mortum, and his family deserves our love and sympathy now. PETA can eat my shorts. And, in spite of them, the University of South Carolina are still the GameCocks and a pet favorite of my sports teams having lived in beautiful Charleston for a while. As they say down there, GO COCKS!

I got a new CD for less $2. That is about how much I like to pay because I am cheap. What worthy music can you get for that price? Go to your local Sam Goody music store (if you have one) and check out the classical music section. You can get 8 full CDs of Motzart's greatest works in a box set for less than $13. You can get some great single CDs with between 60 and 75 minutes of music on them for less than $4. I got a CD of music performed on classical guitar with a run time of 65+ minutes for less than $2. I has Pachabel's Canon in D Major, which is beautiful on the classical guitar. And then it had a song called "Greensleeves." It is a traditional English folk song. Odd, I thought. As I listened to it, it struck me as odd because it seems "Greensleeves" had been replaced with the popular Christmas hymn "O Little Town of Bethlehem." I didn't really think that, but it is the same tune. So I did a little research. I have my research posted below. It is a short and informative read. You can skip it if it really doesn't matter to you, but it is a quick read, and quite informative. (Hang with me Liz, you'll be glad you did {LOL})
--
My Ladye Greensleeves – to give it its full title – is a ballad forever associated with Henry VIII. For centuries, it was said that the lovelorn monarch wrote it for his second wife, Anne Boleyn. Some of the lyrics – "I have both waged life and limb/Your love and good will for to have" appear to be the words of a man who divorced his wife, split from the Roman Catholic Church and executed several of his most trusted advisors, merely so he could marry Anne. However, the truth is far less romantic – most historians now believe this most British ballad dates from Elizabethan times, and is based on an Italian style of song that did not reach England until after Henry's death.

Henry's much-documented love and aptitude for music obviously gave rise to the belief that he was the author of Greensleeves. He was proficient on a number of instruments and wrote music and poems – including a number for his first wife, Katherine of Aragon. Thirty-three of his compositions were collected in the Henry VIII Manuscript – but they do not include Greensleeves. If the song had been written during his reign, its author was likely to have been Dr Robert Fairfax, a great favourite of the King, who wrote masses for the Chapel Royal and secular ballads for the court.

Lyrics:

Alas, my love, you do me wrong,
To cast me off discourteously.
For I have loved you well and long,
Delighting in your company.

Chorus:
Greensleeves was all my joy
Greensleeves was my delight,
Greensleeves was my heart of gold,
And who but my lady greensleeves.

Your vows you've broken, like my heart,
Oh, why did you so enrapture me?
Now I remain in a world apart
But my heart remains in captivity.

chorus

I have been ready at your hand,
To grant whatever you would crave,
I have both wagered life and land,
Your love and good-will for to have.

chorus

If you intend thus to disdain,
It does the more enrapture me,
And even so, I still remain
A lover in captivity.

chorus

My men were clothed all in green,
And they did ever wait on thee;
All this was gallant to be seen,
And yet thou wouldst not love me.

chorus

Thou couldst desire no earthly thing,
but still thou hadst it readily.
Thy music still to play and sing;
And yet thou wouldst not love me.

chorus

Well, I will pray to God on high,
that thou my constancy mayst see,
And that yet once before I die,
Thou wilt vouchsafe to love me.chorus

Ah, Greensleeves, now farewell, adieu,
To God I pray to prosper thee,
For I am still thy lover true,
Come once again and love me.

chorus
--

Hang in there with me for one last part. Please go to Kiersten's blog and read about Pastor Sergey Khripunov and his family who are from Uzbekistan and are in much trouble for preaching the name of Jesus. As you read it, remember what Paul commands us in Romans 13:8 "Owe nothing to anyone except to love one another; for he who loves his neighbor has fulfilled the law." Do what love demands for this godly man whom Kiersten knows personally.

Blessings to you all this weekend,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

A Real Coffee House

2006-09-14T11:51:00.000-07:00

America needs a coffee house. I know what you are thinking when I say that. “But Jared, there seems to be a Starbucks/Dunkin Donuts/Krispy Kreme on every corner. What about the little mom & pop espresso carts?” My dear friends, those are not coffee houses. The precursor to the greatest achievements of recent history (the last 400 years, that is) was the establishment of coffee as the drink of choice in Europe. This led to coffee houses opening up on about every corner in London. Lords and legislators kept regular office hours there, as did a good many people from other trades. It is where seamen found work and captains and ship owners bought boats and cargo at auction. It is where stock exchanges happened (and a famous incident that led to the founding of the London Stock Exchange). But, foremostly, it is where discussion unhindered by bias could take place freely and receive fair criticism. Poets, authors, mathematicians, scientists, and politicians held discussions there on subjects far above the capability of the people of our generation to comprehend. The subject matter covered, discovered, learned and applied in these places led to the great Financial Revolution and the Industrial Revlolution. Lengthly mathematical proofs were tested, methods of research and philosophies of reason were debated. Poets and authors alike read, listened and criticized one another’s works. Professionals in all sorts of fields even gave lectures at coffee houses. In short, everything was open, including minds. So great were the studies, debates, and research that went on in them that they were referred to as penny universities, because for a penny (the price of a “dish” of coffee) anyone could sit down, regardless of social class, with scholars to listen, learn and debate on anything. Please don’t attempt to make a case for the Internet replacing the coffee house. Without face to face interaction, it can’t be replaced. Coffee houses had pretty strict rules regarding one’s conduct, and you could get kicked out for being obnoxious, rude, and unpleasant, or at least forced to buy everyone in the house a “dish” for starting an argument. Such rules don’t apply to this electronic “surreal life” media. But, with schools and colleges teaching our nation’s youth what to think instead of how to think, not much real learning is going on. We are getting dumber and dumber by the generation. We are stifling creativity and holding people back because they won’t submit to the Darwinian mold of science or their new thought is “too radical” to be considered. We are kicking intellectuals out of their seats because they believe in Jesus and won’t submit to the crowd. That is exactly what the coffee house was about preventing. Everyone was free to come, regardless of race, nationality, or education/social pedigree, present anything and were given a fair ear of consideration from their peers and local countrymen. And how can you argue higher education for a few pennies a day? It’d be more like $5 now, but that is much cheaper than any tuition I know. So, as I said, America needs a coffee house. I wish I had the time/money to start such a revolution, but I will have to toss it over to you, my dear readers and ask you to do that which you can to enable these thoughts and ideals in your own lives. Maybe the next generation, our children, will have a coffee house. We could only hope.

You didn’t think you were getting out of this without a little useless trivia, did you? I am making a few logical leaps here, but I think they can be followed. Coffee houses were also hotbeds for the latest gossip and local/international news. If you wanted to know what was going on, you went to the coffee house and read the papers and talked with others about happenings. As referenced above, coffee was sold for a penny by the “dish.” Hence, our use of the phrase “what’s the latest dish” for inquiring about current gossip. Pretty cool, huh?
Once again, allow me to say, if you have not picked up and read A History of the World in 6 Glasses by Tom Standage, you need to. If you are home schooling children, think history and book report all wrapped up into one.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

The Changing of The Seasons

2006-09-13T12:09:00.000-07:00

You can tell that autumn is here. I am really excited. I am a rain/cold type of guy. The clouds blew in today, and it has been a bit chilly. Not a bad fall day. I am loving it. Also, when I was at Safeway, they had the gourds for sale sitting out in front of the store. And, I think with week one of the NFL season in the books, it’s official. I couldn’t be happier about it.

I have been working on having an attitude of gratitude lately. My heart has been low. I have a tendency to see myself for nothing more than my own sin or failures. It is difficult and not something I consciously do. But, when I close my eyes to sleep, I see those failures replaying. When I am just trying to relax, or even when I am in the middle of doing something, those things keep coming to mind. It is difficult to deal with. To combat it, I have been telling the Lord how thankful I am to be His child, and how thankful I am for all of the other great things He has done for me and done in my life. It works…for the most part. I still struggle with it when I close my eyes and just want to sleep, but I am comforted to know that I am in Him and sealed for that glorious Day with the promise of the Holy Spirit.

Here’s today’s funnies, and you will laugh. I would rank a couple of these right up there with reading cats’ facial expressions, though still several rungs higher up the looney ladder (if Liz will permit the expression).

ACTUAL PHONE CALLS RECEIVED BY IAMS PET PROFESSIONALS
• “I have two new kittens and I don’t want to leave them home alone. Can I carry them around in my gym bag?”• “I’m thinking of setting up a kennel, and I was wondering . . . how much poop can 50 dogs make in one year?”• “My son just sold me a subscription to the Iams Your Cat magazine. But you tell me it’s free?”• “I raise worms—the world’s most perfect protein source. How ’bout using them in your food?”• “I can smell my cat’s urine and tell what cat food brand she’s eating. Can you use this talent at Iams?”

Here’s an interesting little piece to which I say, “It is about freakin’ time!” It is from Reuters, which I usually detest, but every once in a while they surprise me.

Skinny models wearing thin in fashion shockerTue Sep 12, 2006 11:43 AM ET

By Andrew Hay
MADRID (Reuters) - The world's first ban on overly thin models at a top-level fashion show in Madrid has caused outrage among modeling agencies and raised the prospect of restrictions at other venues.

Madrid's fashion week has turned away underweight models after protests that girls and young women were trying to copy their rail-thin looks and developing eating disorders.
Organizers say they want to project an image of beauty and health, rather than a waif-like, or heroin chic look.

But Cathy Gould, of New York's Elite modeling agency, said the fashion industry was being used as a scapegoat for illnesses like anorexia and bulimia.

"I think its outrageous, I understand they want to set this tone of healthy beautiful women, but what about discrimination against the model and what about the freedom of the designer," said Gould, Elite's North America director, adding that the move could harm careers of naturally "gazelle-like" models.

Madrid's regional government, which sponsors the show and imposed restrictions, said it did not blame designers and models for anorexia. It said the fashion industry had a responsibility to portray healthy body images.

"Fashion is a mirror and many teenagers imitate what they see on the catwalk," said regional official Concha Guerra.

The mayor of Milan, Italy, Letizia Moratti, told an Italian newspaper this week she would seek a similar ban for her city's show unless it could find a solution to "sick" looking models.

QUALITY, NOT SIZE

The Madrid show is using the body mass index or BMI -- based on weight and height -- to measure models. It has turned away 30 percent of women who took part in the previous event. Medics will be on hand at the September 18-22 show to check models.

"The restrictions could be quite a shock to the fashion world at the beginning, but I'm sure it's important as far as health is concerned," said Leonor Perez Pita, director of Madrid's show, also known as the Pasarela Cibeles.

A spokeswoman for the Association of Fashion Designers of Spain, which represents those at Madrid fashion week, said the group supported restrictions and its concern was the quality of collections, not the size of models.

Eating disorder activists said many Spanish model agencies and designers oppose the ban and they had doubts whether the new rules would be followed.

"If they don't go along with it the next step is to seek legislation, just like with tobacco," said Carmen Gonzalez of Spain's Association in Defense of Attention for Anorexia and Bulimia, which has campaigned for restrictions since the 1990s.

Please be praying for my Jen. She just wrote a very difficult letter to the gal who adopted her sister after their mom passed away. It has been a strained relationship lately and Jen just wants to make the situation right so that she doesn’t have to bear extra burdens. Please pray that this person and her family will respond to it with honesty about the situation and not ostracize Jen for saying something.

I think that is all for today. If you haven’t been keeping up with A Night Of Rest on Susan’s blog, you should be. The story is getting very interesting and remaining enjoyable to read.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

If There's a Hell...

2006-09-12T13:41:00.000-07:00

I found this story today. You should check it out. I'm sure if there's a hell, this is what is playing there. J.R.R. Tolkien is rolling over in his grave. 'Nuff said.

I'm stealing from Liz today, who may not be the most prolific blogger, but certainly has the greatest ideas. She had a post last week on fond childhood memories. Kiersten followed suit, so I thought that I would too. Reading theirs have been enlightening. Their words remind me of just how broken my generation and the one just before it is. Not that we should expect any less since we have rebelled against God as a country.

I don't have too many fond childhood memories either. Some fond times, as they seemed at the time, but, in the perspective of my whole childhood, they really seem bitter. Times with friends who had abandoned me. Times with brothers who never call. I suppose the fondest time of my life was when I was between 9 months and 5 years old. We lived on what we called "the house on the hill." When we moved, we just moved down the same gravel road about a mile. Oddly, there aren't that many houses on Skelton Road in Jefferson, but we occupied two of them. When we lived up in the house on the hill, we were probably poorer than we ever were the rest of my childhood. Mom made everything from scratch, and we ate a lot of bread and biscuits. But we had cattle that we raised, chickens that laid eggs, and a couple of cats. We frequently picked wild blackberries that were always made into a pie that went along some homemade ice cream. And the ice cream was made from fresh milk. Jefferson was just that kind of a town at the time. I was never happier than I was at 4 years old, running around on that 2 acre plot. Playing on the hay in the barn or in our sizable yard. TV was nice, but it was never a constant in our lives. There were too many things to do. The outside world held so many promises of fun, discovery and excitement. That is one of the reasons I plan on moving back to the Midwest. I want my kids to have that too. If I could live on a farm and be a farmer for the rest of my life, I would be a very happy man. And maybe, just maybe, I would catch some of that magic again. I can think of few things that would be more wonderful.

Liz also did a word association post, so in the spirit of theivery, I'll play along.

snow - angel
purple - bruise
lazy - me
tarantula - WHERE!
flower - sun (as in sunflower; my mother grows these every year)

Speaking of Kiersten, her blog seal with the new slogan is up on her blog. I love it! She is so creative. I created a seal, but this stinking work PC won't let me upload it. Later, perhaps.

I'd send you all to Liz's blog for a good laugh, but, gauging from comments often left, nobody follows the links to the story/post. This one can not go unseen. Here is the good stuff from Liz's blog today. You should make it a habit to stop by. I'm hesitant to put this stuff up, being a dude, but it has to be seen. So, I know Liz checks up on me regularly, you can skip this part, Sis. Here's a tribute to your wit and good sense of humor.

PREGNANCY Q & A & more!

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.

10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"
1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.
3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
5. You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: "How's my driving-call 1-800-".
6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space."
8. You can't believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super Plus.
9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
10. The ibeuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.

TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND
10. Cats' facial expressions. (Jared's comment: I still say anyone who claims to be able to do this is crazy)
9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.
8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.
7. Fat clothes.
6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and eggshell.
4. Cutting your hair to make it grow.
3. Eyelash curlers.
2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.
AND, the Number One Number One thing only women understand:1. OTHER WOMEN

How about some interesting movie blooper facts for the big finish?

BOX OFFICE BLOOPERS

Movie: The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)
Scene: The audience is told that it is a "late November evening."
Blooper: In the very next scene, when Brad (Barry Bostwick) and Janet (Susan Sarandon) are in the car, Richard Nixon's resignation speech is playing on the radio. Nixon resigned in August.

Movie: Pearl Harbor (2001)
Scene: When Evelyn (Kate Beckinsale) first arrives at Pearl Harbor, she walks past a tall building.
Blooper: The building has a sign that reads "Est. 1953" 12 years after the actual attack.

Here's a "blow your mind" fact: for the last 150 years, Bolivia has averaged one new government per year. That's that one country with Lake Titicaca. I can never type or say that without a good hard chuckle. My inner Frat Boy just thinks it's funny.

Blessings,

Big J
"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

A New Sad National Holiday

2006-09-11T14:29:00.000-07:00

It seems that every blog-buddy is talking about 9/11/2001 today. It is the 5-year anniversary. It was a sad day. But, to tell you honestly, I am not really ready or desirous to talk about it or deal with it today. Maybe I still have some residual post-traumatic stress disorder, or maybe I am just not wanting to deal with it because I have been in a funk. I am honestly not sure. But I want to move on with my life and this posting to some more light-hearted stuff. I am tired of being depressed.

I bought a PS2 over the weekend. For all of you non-gamers, that is short for Play Station 2. The price dropped low enough, and I was ready to get something. I will still get the Wii when it comes out, but I have been out the current gaming scene for 10 years. I haven't had the latest console since my parents bought me a Super Nintendo back in 1994. I was ready. A PS2 still isn't exactly the "latest." The XBox 360 came out recently, and the PS3 will debut soon, as will the Wii. I just wanted something newer than what I have (which is over a decade old). I spent the majority of my weekend playing the LEGO Star Wars video game with Jen, and we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. It was relaxing and fun.

Speaking of entertainment media, did you know that England was the first country with regular television service in 1936? We (the USA) came in at second in 1939. Wow, doesn't this sound a lot like a segue(sp?) into fun facts?

Here are some fun facts about pizza:

First take-out pizza: In 1889 King Umberto and Queen Margherita of Italy wanted to sample the Neapolitan street food but didn’t want to go out. So she ordered pizzeria owner Raffaele Esposito to bring the pizzas to her. He made three kinds, including one with tomato paste, fresh basil, and a new ingredient, mozzarella cheese.

First pizzeria in the United States: opened by Gennaro Lombardi in 1905, on Spring Street in New York City’s Little Italy.

The first deep-dish pizza: invented in the 1940s by Chicago's Pizzeria Uno.

The first frozen pizza: marketed by Celentano Brothers in 1957.

The first Pizza Hut: opened in 1958 by two brothers attending Wichita State University.

Here's an interesting little story. It has an unexpected ending:

After someone spilled raw fish oil on his metal deck, a Scottish fishing-boat captain named Robert Fergusson noticed that—over time—the deck stopped rusting. So after he landed in New Orleans, Fergusson spent many years trying to formulate a fish oil–based paint that would inhibit rust and corrosion. His biggest problem wasn’t getting it to work, but getting it to work without smelling fishy. Finally in 1921, after working with a LOT of fish oil, Fergusson unveiled a new paint that stopped rust, dried overnight, and left no lingering aroma: Rust-Oleum.

And, last but not least, Abraham Lincoln was named after his grandfather.

I think that's it for today, kiddies. Please pray that the Lord would lift my spirits. I need my heart to be "refreshed." I'm honestly not sure what that really means or looks like, but the expression seemed to spring to my memory as an exact fit.

I am thankful for every good thing the Lord is doing in my life. Things have changed for me. Life is much better than it used to be (even just 3 weeks ago). I just need to keep reminding myself of these good things that He has done for me. They do help get me through the tough times.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

When Your Coffee Tastes Like Chicken...

2006-09-08T11:45:00.000-07:00

I have an espresso maker. Not the stupid messy, and pretty much worthless kind you get from Starbucks which bogarts your counter space and is a beast to clean. I have a stove top espresso maker. If you don't know what that is, hit eBay and do a search for "stove top espresso." All will be revealed. It actually does a fantastic job. I have a Bialetti, which is the Kleenex brand of espresso makers. Anyway, I made my espresso this morning and was converting it into a hazelnut latte. I accidentally scalded my milk somewhat severely. I didn't really think it was that bad, so I poured it into my waiting espresso and hazelnut syrup mixture and took a sip...I was left somewhere between gross and weird. I couldn't quite pick up what I was getting. It hit me right at the end of the second sip. There was a slight aftertaste of, and I kid you not, chicken. My face turned as sour looking as Bill Cowher on game day, and I dumped my coffee down the sink. I think I'll try that again tomorrow without scalding the milk.

Liz asked me where I get so much inspiration to write from, since my postings are often so long. Aside from Jen, this is my only significant interaction with other people during my day. When you don't do much or see many people, and you have a lot of time on your hands to think, a long blog post is the natural outcome. At least it is for me. I am an extravert forced to live an introvert's life. I could talk forever about stuff...and then some.

I came across an article with an interesting perspecitve. It is not a balanced piece, but it has some interesting perspectives that I gladly agree with. It is about the veil covering the head and dressing very modestly in general that many Muslims do. You should go read the whole article, but here is the quote that I really appreciated:

(Dena al-Atassi) said (she) noticed that veiled women showed a self-confidence lacking among American women, who seemed to her to be trying to transform themselves into a Barbie-doll ideal. “I would meet women who were not attractive by Western standards,’’ Ms. Atassi said, “and when I told them, ‘You look beautiful,’ they would say, ‘I know, thank God.’ They really believe it. The veil facilitates inner strength, a greater feeling of self-esteem.”

Now, I am not endorsing the idea of all American women wearing hejabs, but I think we are missing a great lesson that can be learned. There are many Muslims out there that hate America/Americans, but there are also many who don't. I think of those who might be willing to be our friends that we have much to learn from them, as they from us. Modesty is not repression. It is freedom.

In other news, anti-Semitism is on the rise. It has been a quiet murmur that I believe is turning into a roar. I am fearful for the Jewish people. It seems to be popular to be anti-Semitic right now, and I just wish that Western society had learned its lesson from Hitler. If you take a look at our politicians (especially the social liberals), it is pretty obvious that we haven't. Now is the time to be praying fervently for God's chosen people. Pray that they may be protected from harm, and that they may see His Truth.

How about a little light-heartedness to end the week? I'm not sure if this bit is more clever than stupid or funny, but it deserves a spot here, so I'll let you be the judge.

In 1974 press agent Marty Weiser leased a drive-in theater in Los Angeles and invited the press to attend a movie premiere . . . for horses. Weiser featured a “horsepitality bar” full of “horse d’oeuvres” (popcorn buckets filled with oats). And true to his word, more than 250 horses and their riders paraded into the theater, “parked” in the stalls, and watched the movie. It worked! The odd story appeared in every newspaper and newscast in town, which attracted huge crowds to the film Weiser was promoting, Mel Brooks’s western comedy spoof Blazing Saddles.

Here's your Dork of the Week Award:

Honoree: Rock musician Lenny Kravitz

Notable Achievement: Having a toilet backup that cost a load of money.

Background: In October 2004, Kravitz was sued by an insurance company that claimed it had to pay $333,849.77 to repair the “catastrophic water damage” in the apartment below Kravitz’s when his toilet overflowed. Court papers alleged that Kravitz caused a toilet in his $8 million New York condominium to “become blocked, clogged and congested with various materials.” (No word on what the “materials” were.)

Our toilet backed up once, and it cost us about $10: the price of a new mop. So I just have to do that 33,385 more times and Lenny 'n me will be even.

Here's your Wacko of the Week (maybe even Year) Award:

Honoree: Ignacio Javier Bilbao Goikoetxea, a convicted murderer and member of armed separatist group ETA

Notable Achievement: Threatening the judge at his trial for threatening another judge, who he threatened again at his trial

Background: Goikoetxea, on trial for threatening to kill a judge on Thursday told the presiding judge that he would shoot him and "skin him alive," risking yet another jail sentence. He also kicked the dock's bullet-proof screen and launched a torrent of abuse at judge Alfonso Guevara and Baltasar Garzon, the judge he had threatened at a previous trial who was appearing as a witness. "If you're a man, come here ... I'm going to skin you alive. Come here if you've got the balls... I look forward to shooting you seven times when I get my hands on you," the shaven-headed Bilbao Goikoetxea told Guevara in the Madrid courtroom.
It is the second time he has been tried for threatening Garzon after being jailed for two years at a previous trial.

All I can say is that I like this dude: Oil prices are so high, that oilman Steve Jordan is drilling a well next to his home near Lake Charles, Louisiana, he said on Wednesday. Jordan, 52, said the well will stretch 8,500 feet (2,591 metres) under his house and swimming pool and below the adjacent Calcasieu River. He hopes to strike oil in about 10 days on a prospect that wouldn't have been worth drilling when prices were lower, he said. "I'm not trying to prove anything," Jordan said in a telephone interview. "I'm trying to make money."

That is my kind of man.

I continue to be amazed at the stupidity of spammers/phishers. Here are a few that I received that I am laughing about pretty hard.

Gmail Update to kingjaybee, kingjaymes, me, kingjazz Hide options Aug 9 From: Gmail Update Reply-To: Gmail Update To: kingjaybee@gmail.com, kingjaymes@gmail.com, kingjazz@gmail.com
Date: Aug 9, 2006 12:29 AM Subject: Gmail Member Services Annoucement 0416911285
Dear Member, As part of the gmail family we would like to thank you as a dedicated member and invite you to reap the benefits of these amazing deals. Click Here Regards, Ina Rocha Gmail Member Services I found it odd/ironic that these two symbol combonations were found in the code of this email ,0] );

Re: Your ebay winning bid discount 482327468
Ebay Quality to me Aug 8 Hi,
Quality products at ebay prices. More info here

Well, that rounds it out for the week.

Blessings y'all,

Big J

Blogger Beatings

2006-09-07T11:35:00.000-07:00

I fought the blog and the blog won, I shall say in the pirated expression of an old country song. Blogger kicked my butt all over cyberspace yesterday. There was absolutely no way it would let me post. Then the network went down here at work. Needless to say, technical difficulties kept me out yesterday.

STOP THE PRESSES!! STOP THE PRESSES!!!!!! I have a very important announcement to make! Today is the beginning of the new year. What?! Yes, you heard me, today is the first day of the new year! Forget January 1. What happens then anyways? Nothing! That's what! Today, the first official regular season game of the NFL is played. Pause everything you are doing at 5:30 PDT and go watch it (though I'll exempt Justin from this). That isn't a request. Thank you. We now return you to your regularly scheduled blog.

Speaking of Justin, he doesn't get enough press around this joint, and I think I am going to have to take it up with the editor. I really enjoy reading his blog. If you don't go there often, you should. He has a very interesting perspective on life, spirituality and ministry. In this post he discusses this article about religious people (especially women) having more satisfying sex lives than unmarried women. I left this response: "(I)t is so totally true. Couples who were chaste pre-marriage do have more fun in bed." to which another blogger left this response: "Is it true? or just what every youth pastor wants us to believe so we do screw around pre-marriage? I'm not knocking the idea, but I wonder where we get these wonderful sounding claims to back theology so that 'we win' no matter what the alternate lifestyle choices we make." I'll let you read the post and my further response to this individual, but I am saddened that people can actually think this. I have never been a youth pastor or paid ministry professional, so I merely speak from my experience. Know that my comments are not intended as an insult or knock on anyone who has led or is currently leading an "alternative lifestyle." I merely say what I know. I have yet to meet a person who has had multiple sexual partners that is as happy as I am with Jen, and I have known plenty. I live in the Portland, OR area on the "Left Coast," so there are plenty who lead alternative lifestyles around here. I work with many, and have worked with a lot in the past. That isn't to say that there isn't hope healing and renewal for those who have come out of that lifestyle into faith in Christ. I have known so many who have found peace and satisfaction with their sex life they never knew possible after they came to Christ. But to those who would think it is all about "us being right" and it being a "we win no matter what" mentality about it, you are severely wrong. I have seen the truth with my own eyes, and I want that for others more than anything. This has nothing to do with theology and everything to do with love, concern and compassion. To those who find God the great cosmic kill-joy, you must understand that He has said these things with very sound reason. I could give a grand number of good reasons for chaste pre-marital behavior, but I won't because they are not my point. My point is that encouraging it is something done out of love, not the desire to be right.

Today is "Thankful Thursday" over at Liz's blog. What are you thankful for today? I'll make the roll there by saying I am thankful for the beginning of the NFL season. I am thankful that I am married to a godly woman who has a good amount of common sense, and who loves football and video games too. I am thankful that the Lord has provided me with the blessed fellowship of the saints as facilitated by this blog and the Internet. I am thankful that Al Gore invented the Internet (LOL). Seriously, y'all are a tremendous blessing to me. I love you all. You are a perspective enforcer for me. "Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

I have a few responses to some comments left here that I think would be beneficial, and, hey, it is my blog, so buckle up and enjoy the ride.

Chelf, I'd like to think I am the a really nice guy, but I think honest is a better word. I love my Jen, and I feel that I have a duty to do every reasonable thing I can to ensure that I am attractive to her. Your situation is different, and there is nothing wrong with that. But I was 165 pounds when I got married. I feel like I owe her a little more than I give now. I am fluctuating around 225, and I could and should do better than that. I am taking things slowly and building up, though. I am starting with doing more laundry and dishes. When I master doing at least my fair shake of those (which I think are more important to her right now), I will start getting into working on my appearance. I see myself as owing her at least that.

In regards to it being okay for wives to say such things to husbands and not vice versa, it is a complex thing. First off, there is the battle of the sexes that is going on, but doesn't have to be. There are too many women out there who think, "How dare he have any expectations of me!" Secondly, recently I am aware of a situation of a man telling his wife she needed to lose weight, and he was in more desperate need of it than she was. Jen and I don't have either of these burning in the background of our interactions or conversations. We know where we stand with each other on many issues and we accept each others struggles. She struggles with certain reasonable expectations I have of her too. We don't say it to be critical of each other, we are just forward about our needs and desires in our relationship.

Rachman, no reprimand needed. I don't blame you for not assuming that I am already considering or doing those things. There are a lot of idiots out here on the net who don't have much common sense about much of anything. I am asking a lot of questions about how I should go about getting started on the things I can take action on right now. I definitely covet the prayers of my fellow saints on these issues. I am actually just grateful that you came back to visit my blog.

So, I got tagged by Special K to do this little meme thing (is that pronounced "me-me" or "meem?" Anyone?). It actually was kinda cool because it got me thinking about things. I would love it if any of you would enjoy playing along.

1. A book that changed my life: Aside from the Bible, I would have to say Decision Making and The Will of God by Dr. Garry Friesen. He was a much beloved teacher of mine at Multnomah Bible College and his book was just as revolutionary to my faith as was his class on the Pentateuch.

2. A book I have read more than once: The Bible, kind of. If you want something else, how about I'll Teach My Dog One Hundred Words. If you haven't read it, you haven't lived.

3. A book I would want on a desert island: Any common smut novel. That way I wouldn't feel guilty for starting a fire with it.

4. A book that made me laugh: Sometimes The Magic Still Works by Terry Brooks. It is his story about his life, his writing, and how he got to where he is today. Well worth the $11.95 for the paperback.

5. A book that made me cry: Judges. It is all about how God's people broke their promise to Him. There are so many tragedies in it that if it weren't followed by Ruth and 1 Samuel, it would be tough to read that portion of Scripture straight through. I don't read casually to have cathartic emotional experiences.

6. A book I wish I had written: A Complete History of Football in North America. It hasn't been written...yet. It is a fantasy of mine to someday write it, though.

7. A book I wish had never been written: The Armageddon comic book series. They are what really started the degeneration of comic books into the sex and gore filled novellas that they are today.

8. A book I am currently reading: A History of the World in Six Glasses. Aside from some assumptions by the author that are not well enough explained, this book provides an extremely unique view into the history of mankind. Another of those, "If you haven't read it, you have to" books.

9. A book I have been meaning to read: This list is waaayyyyyy too long to put here. I have been in school for four years straight now. How about a book that I have been meaning to reread? Transitions Through Adult Life by Charles Sell. Also, Healing the Child Within whose author I can't remember. You have to wade through some hyper-emotionalist BS in Healing but it and Transitions are both great books I had to read for school, so I couldn't give them the treatment and attention I felt they deserved.

10. People I think will play along. Well, if you're reading these words, consider yourself tagged to play along. If you genuinely don't have time, I won't harp. But, I haven't seen Susan comment much lately. How about Soph? She always surprises me when she comments here. I'd love to see Justin play along because I know he is an avid reader. How about Jennifer over at "Talk About Words?" I'd love to tag Niki, but I know she's busy. Rachman? How about you? All are welcome.

Alright, once again, this posting is longer the drawled out syllables of our president's speech. I suppose I ought turn in.

Blessings,

Big J

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." Fyodor Dostoevsky

The Weekend That Was

2006-09-05T16:45:00.000-07:00

I spent a lot of my labor day running errands and doing chores, so I was bummed by that. But, I did get some good rest in and I got to watch a lot of good football. I was pretty content with that lot. From the sound of Kiersten's weekend, or Liz's, I think I got away with a lot of rest. I suppose I am still getting the "kid's definition" of rest worked out of my system. It would probably be just fine if I were sleeping well.

My wife informed me that I need to shake a few (try 10 to 20) pounds. She's right. I have been in need of that for a while. I could probably kick a few pounds if I got more exercise, but that leads back to the energy and sleeping thing that is going on right now. Please pray for me in this area.

Let's have a little fun. How about this: Sherlock Holmes, the world;s most famous detective, never "spoke" the line for which he is most remembered. In only two of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's stories does he even come close. In 1893's The Crooked Man, Holmes makes his usual array of deductive conclusions, to which his assistant Dr. Watson exclaims, "Excellent!" Holmes's one-word reply is "Elementary." In A Case of Identity, Holmes says, "All this is amusing, though rather elementary, but I must go back to business, Watson." Where does this kind of stuff come up? How do we go from fact to fiction like this? It would be a very interesting study in the history of language.

Speaking of the history of language: The word "Seersucker" comes from the Persian word "shiroshakar" which means "milk and sugar."

Put this in the file of the weird and...uh...weird: Tug-of-War was an Olympic event between 1900 and 1920.

To honor Labor Day (yeah, I know it was yesterday), here is some forgotten history about the largest labor organization in the United States in the late 1800s the Knights of Labor. The policies they advocated were revolutionary for their time:
- An end to child labor
- Equal pay for equal work between the sexes and races
- A public land policy designed to aid settlers, not speculators
- Universal suffrage (the right to vote)
- An eight-hour work day
None of these practices would be taken seriously by lawmakers until the 20th century. Yet, with the exception of universal suffrage, all of these are still, debatably, an issue.

Here's an interesting tidbit: Ancient Rome had traffic jams. Who would've thought, eh?

Something else you will never need to know but will save your butt someday on Jeopardy: A pop can can hold 90 pounds of pressure per square inch, which is about three times as much as most car tires. Another useless fact: Our atmosphere has a natural air pressure of about 14 pounds per square inch. You can automatically add that to about any measurement of pressure (like the previous one) to get a more exact/accurate figure because the vast majority do not account for the natural pressure in the atmosphere.

I am going to harp a little. I thought that I was going to be a little "ho-hum" as I read through the last two chapters of 1 Timothy. I had really gotten a lot out of the first four, and had skimmed the last two before reading them. Boy, was I ever wrong. It left me with some real questions. Where is discipleship in the church? I have asked this one many times previously, and this reading brought it back to the forefront. How can church elders/leaders expect perpetuation and prosperity of a church whose leaders they are not personally taking responsibility for raising up? Why are we wondering about the cause of so many smaller to mid-size churches that are dying out?

The other question is: What has the church been doing to actively minister to the widows? For younger widows, what has the church done to ensure their development and foster potential for remarriage? For older widows, what has the church done to help and care for them in their time of need (that is, for the rest of their lives after their husbands have passed away)? We are getting so focused on ministries that entertain rather than build up because that brings bodies and dollars through the door so the leadership can fulfill their pet desires in so many situations. I hate to say it, but I think that is where my church is going.

We'll, I'll quit bumming you all out with this. I have been asking a lot of hard questions about myself and about my life, lately. I suppose I need to get on the road to some answers before I drive myself nuts.

Blessings,

Big J

The Good In The Bad

2006-09-01T12:13:00.000-07:00

It is Friday! Sweeeeeeeeeet. Notre Dame (vs. GA Tech) and USC (vs. Arkansas) both play on Saturday at or about 5pm Pacific time. I am already licking my chops. Suprisingly, I get Monday off, so it will be an extended weekend.

My thanks to all of you who showed up to encourage me and show me some love. I am really encouraged by the fellowship I have here. This is the first true fellowship I have felt that I can remember, and it is sweet and refreshing. If only we lived closer that we might be refreshed by each other's presence, as well. I love you all and appreciate your prayers. You have all been in mine.

In a comment on my last post, Kiersten suggested that being woken up by heart palpitations the other night and the questioning it caused was the work of the enemy. I wish to gently, kindly and respectfully disagree. I really appreciated the humor in her comment, and it got me laughing good, but that incident was exactly what I needed. It didn't make me feel like the biggest loser in the Kingdom, but rather made me come face to face with something that has been suppressed lately by my feelings of apathy. I needed to be jolted from the spiritual doldrums I have been in to action. God has done more severe things. Nine years ago last week on Wednesday, Lou Gherig's disease took my mother-in-law from this earth. Jen was merely 17. Kathleen suffered with ALS for 13 years. It cost her everything: her marriage, custody of her daughters for most of that time, her independence, and her ability to exert any control over her environment. In the end, though, that is what brought her to Christ and what enabled her to leave one of the greatest legacies of faith beyond human comprehension for her daughters. I only met her through pictures, but I am sure that she prayed for me, the man who would marry her daughter. Sometimes, it is through these things that the greatest purposes of God are accomplished. I need to wake up and start living more day to day for Jesus. I need to quit wasting time and start honoring Kathleen's prayers. That episode the other night was a reminder of that. I still love you, Kiersten ;) and I beg you to not quit speaking God's truth into my life. I value it too much.

I have only gotten 2 votes thus far on my blog's new slogan. There are more of you out there than that, and it is only a click away, so c'mon and play along. Tell me, what should my blog's new slogan be?

I am thankful today for the beautiful and wonderful woman I am married to. I am grateful for the wonderful brothers and sisters I have who give me such love and encouragement. Life may not be easy, but I love what Fyodor Dostoevsky (the author of Crime and Punishment) once said: "Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it." This comes from a dude who spent many years in prison in Siberia. Coming from such a source, it is advice that you must respect.

I have a link here to an article about the psychology of buying and selling on eBay. This is in honor of Liz, the self-appointed eBay Queen. Being a psychology major, I love stuff like this. Plus, it tells you how to get great deals.

I have been light on fun-facts lately. How about some to close out the week?

People have been sleeping on water-filled bags for more than 3,500 years. The Persians were the first—they sewed goatskins together, filled them with water, and left them in the sun to get warm. The direct ancestor of the modern water bed was invented in 1853 by Dr. William Hooper of Portsmouth, England. He used it to treat bedridden patients suffering from bedsores, as well as burn victims and arthritis sufferers. His water bed wasn’t much more than a rubber hot water bottle big enough to sleep on. It wasn’t until 1967 that San Francisco design student Charles Hall made an improved model out of vinyl and added an electric heating element to keep the bed warm all the time.

How about this crazy one? In 1992, NASA spent $200,000 on a "sanitary-napkin disposal unit" for female astronauts. Never take the $2 Wal-Mart garbage can for granted.

Here's some "bad Engrish" from around the globe:

-In a Finland hostel: “If you cannot reach a fire exit, close the door and expose yourself at the window.”
-From a Majorca, Spain, shop entrance: “Here speeching American.”
-In a Nairobi restaurant: “Customers who find our waitresses rude ought to see the manager.”

Here's a daily dose of severe irony: In March of 2003, the Hong Kong Tourism Board put their new slogan—“Hong Kong Will Take Your Breath Away”—in ads in several major publications in England. Just as the ad campaign began, Hong Kong was hit by an outbreak of SARS (Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome), which led to a rapid decline in tourism, severely damaging the economy. “As soon as the outbreak began,” said a Tourism Board spokesman, “we realized it would be pretty embarrassing, but it was too late to pull the ads.” What was so embarrassing? The main symptom of SARS: shortness of breath. All I can say to this is, "Ouch."

This blog posting has gone longer than a "Hail-Mary" pass, so I suppose I'll shut it down for the weekend. I hope yours is safe and filled with blessings,

Big J

Slogans and Stuff

2006-08-31T13:19:00.000-07:00

Well, I got the new Bi-Mart ads today, and there is a college football game going on tonight, though I'll only get to see highlights, but that is pretty close to doing really good. Ahhh, Bi-Mart ads and football season. It could only be better if it were a chilly autumn day outside, but, alas, I must suffer more sun until fairer weather arrives, hopefully by mid-September. It was almost all the way through October when it finally cooled down enough last year!

So Liz got me hooked on getting sloganized. There is a link to a website on this week's Thankful Thursday post on her blog. Here are some of the slogans it came up with for my blog:

Fun and cool category -
The Big J that Smiles Back.
Happiness is Big J-Shaped.
The Big J That Likes To Say Yes.
Lightening the Big J.
Say It With Big J.
Think Big J.
Make Big J Yours.
I'm Only Here For The Big J.
If You Like A Lot Of Big J On Your Biscuit, Join Our Club.

Don't Live a Little, Live a Big J.
Every Kiss Begins With Big J.
Did Somebody Say Big J?
Designed for Big J.
Simple Impartial Big J. (Simple, but not impartial. Anyone who's been around this blog long enough knows that.)
To Our Members, We're the Fourth Emergency Big J.
Because I'm Worth Big J.
Aaahh, Big J!

Ego stroking category -
When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Big J.
Wouldn't You Like To Be A Big J Too?
You Can Be Sure of Big J.
The Big J of Champions.
Maybe She's Born With It, Maybe It's Big J. (My wife can say this. I act as a wardrobe consultant and hair-stylist for her. I don't cut it, but I help her style it upon request)
So Easy, No Wonder Big J is #1.
If You Want To Get Ahead, Get A Big J.

Just plain creepy category -
You Too Can Have A Big J Like Mine.
Once you pop, you canÂt stop Big J.
Men Can't Help Acting On Big J.
Leave the Big J to Us.
Moms like you choose Big J.
Reach Out and Touch Big J.
Strong Enough for a Man, Made for a Big J.
Big J. It's What's For Dinner.
Top Breeders Recommend Big J.
Gee, Your Big J Smells Terrific.
Make Fun of Big J. (Please don't. I'm asensitivee dude)
The Big J With The Hole. (I don't want to know where this came from!)

So I was thinking, "My blog should have a cool slogan! This is cool!" So, I found the only free and decent "Create your own web poll" site I could, and I put my top choices on there. I don't usually give myself over to the whims of the audience, but I thought I'd take a poll and see what you all thought. So vote and let me know, "What should my blog's new slogan be?"

I was reading Soph's comment in my Gmail account and this was the ad at the top of the screen www.tofubear.com. You should go check it out. It is weird. I really appreciated Soph's comments. I haven't gotten a peak at her more humorous side before. You're pretty funny! Keep it coming.

I was thinking yesterday that I don't have the anticipation for the glorious return of Christ that I should. I asked myself if I had longed for that as much as I had been anticipating the start of football season, the release of the Nintendo Wii, or even just going home to see my wife every night. Sadly, I haven't been. I have gotten lost trying to survive day-to-day rather than living for that "grand tomorrow." It is something I need to put more emphasis on in my daily life. That really came through when some severe heart palpatations woke me up last night shortly after I had fallen asleep. I had a bunch of tests done on me in my mid-teens when they started, and the doctor couldn't find anything to pinpoint it. He said it was just a weird thing that my body did that I would just have to live with onoccasionn. Nevertheless, it is enough to make you soil your sheets when it wakes you up. My heart did not beat normally for a good 10 minutes afterward, which made me afraid to fall back asleep. It made me think, "What have I really been doing for Christ on a daily basis?" "What eternal value am I building in my life right now?" I am always thankful that "nothing" is not the answer to those questions, but "not nearly enough" was. I am feeling pretty disappointed in myself, not to the point of severe discouragement, but I got that uncomfortable feeling you get when you know something unpleasant you just heard is true. I feel bad about that. I need to figure out what the next logical steps in my spiritual walk are and take them. I am overdue for that.

I am really blessed by the responses I have gotten from you all on the smoothie recipe. For those of you carping (yes, carping) over suggesting tofu instead of yogurt, don't knock it until you try it. I had a homemade ice cream made with soy-milk and tofu (for thickening), and, though it had not been sweetened sufficiently, if it had, it would have been decent for tofu ice cream. It was what it was, tofu ice cream, but for what it was, it was decent. For those of you who do not know how to make Ben 'n Jerry's/Haggen Daas/Dove quality ice cream at home, it is simple. And, like Soph said, if you had homemade ice cream you didn't like, it was not made properly. That is like saying you only like store bought apple pie or store bought pre-cooked ribs. You just have to make sure there is enough fat and eggs in the mixture, along with top notch ingredients, and have the mixture chilled seriously before you process it in the ice cream freezer. After you make up the mixture, make sure it spends 24 hours in the refrigerator, and then 20 minutes, or so, in the freezer right before you put it in the ice cream machine. That will give you a very low overrun (the air to ingredient ratio) that makes for a thick, creamy, and decadent ice cream. I have Ben 'n Jerryesque recipes I can share with anyone who would like to make a good ice cream at home. Just remember to temper the egg mixture so that they don't scramble under the heat, and don't skip the step of heating them, especially if using store bought eggs, or run the risk of nasty sickness or, worse yet, and untimely meeting with "Joe Black." Bottom line, you can crank out with a $20 Rival brand el cheapo ice cream maker anything Ben or Jerry can make on their very best day. Best of all, you know exactly what is in your food because you put it there :) Ingredients lists never tell the whole tale.

I had some more, but I won't bore you all with my long-winded ramblings. Besides, the shipment of clean uniform items is calling my name, and I have to have them put away before I go home. We had two unscheduled accidental evacuations of the plant yesterday, which totally dried out our supply of clean uniforms.

Blessings,

Big J

Smoothies and memes

2006-08-30T16:55:00.000-07:00

Social Security Field Assignment update, Day #10: Things are going along really smoothly, with the exception of one minor detail. And that is that I haven't exactly started work on correcting my field assignment. But, before you start throwing full wine bottles at your computer screen in rage, allow me to offer a cop out by entertaining you a little.

How about a meme!? Those are fun, right? Yeah, I know, just go along with it. It'll be fun. How can you not trust this face? I'll even go first.

4 Jobs I have had in my life:
1. McDonald's employee
2. Carpenter
3. Parcel Delivery Driver
4. Schwan's man (doesn't everyone love the guy who gives out the free ice cream?)

4 Movies I could watch over and over:
1. Ronin
1. Napoleon Dynamite (tie)
3. The Princess Bride
4. Polar Express (I got to see it on IMAX)

4 Places I have lived:1. Jefferson, OR
2. Charleston, SC
3. Eugene, OR
4. Vancouver, WA

4 Things I like to do:
1. Spend time with Jen (my wife)
2. Play Nintendo games (yes, I am brand loyal)
3. Brew beer
4. Go places I have never been

4 Places I've been on vacation:
1. Chelan, WA
2. Myrtle Beach, SC
3. St. Simon's Island, GA
4. Crescent City, CA(if you have never been to the top 3, you have never been anywhere; they are places to see before you die)

4 websites I visit daily:
1. Special K's blog
2. Liz's Looney blog
3. Niki's rad blog(s)
4. Gmail/Google

4 of my favorite foods:
1. Pizza
2. New York Steak
3. Pizza
4. Home made ice cream

4 places I would like to be right now:
1. At home with Jen
2. See above vacation spots
3. Not at work
4. Hanging with any of my blog buddies in the real world

4 friends I think will play along:
1. I'm bet Niki might (spell check suggested the word "Nazi" here, but it also didn't recognize "Google" either)
2. Kiersten
3. Liz
4. How about Chelf? She's been quiet lately.

I have been dying to put this up for a while. I have a very reliable yogurt smoothie recipe that I have enjoyed. It was inspired by a little fresh fruit and a desire for something cold and refreshing to drink last summer that would be a good and quick breakfast. So here it is:

1 very ripe banana
1 sufficiently ripe peach, nectarine or mango
a cup and a half of ice (maybe a little more or less depending on your taste)
1 6 or 8 oz. container peach yogurt (since they don't make mango or nectarine yogurt it is a good second)
one tablespoon of orange juice concentrate

Cut your ripe fruit up and put that in first, then the yogurt, and finally the oj concentrate and ice. Use pulse at the highest speed, if your blender has that option. Jen and I own a Kitchenaid Duet, which doubles as a food processor, and I use the "food processor" button, which is just below "ice crush" and just above "liquefy" in speed. You may have to shake the blender a couple of times to get it to all get down in there and start the process of blending together if you don't have a special "smoothie" type or professional coffee shop style blender.

The orange juice concentrate gives you balance. If the fruit is a little on the green side still, it will provide sweetness. If the fruit is a little too ripe, it will provide sufficient acidity to keep it from being too cloyingly sweet. Substituting a cup or so of strawberries for the peach/nectarine/mango and strawberry yogurt for the peach yogurt gives you a nice strawberry smoothie. If there is an allergy to dairy to be concerned about, you might use tofu, a little sweetener, and another piece or so of fruit. I have one for breakfast as often as possible. What an easy way to get your fruit and protein intake.

It is another one of those brain fog days. Still stuck here. I have got to get back in the groove (still suffering from coming off of swing shift to days).

Well, I'm gonna go build me a deck. Not really. I'll just do more staring at the computer screen until it is time to go home.

Blessings,

Big J

I'm Blank

2006-08-29T09:13:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling pretty blank this week. A long run in school coupled with frustrating circumstances at work (work place politics) have sucked all the concern I have for what's going on in the world around me right out of my brain. Yup, I got nuthin. I just want to look at the Bi-Mart ads and I want football season to start. Yup...yup...mmhm. Brain dead.

Kiersten got put in charge of the worship arts ministry at her church, which is awesome. We're rooting and praying for you, sis. If any of y'all have any creative ideas, you should go to her blog and share them with her.

When I download all of my pictures from the hike that Jen and I took with my folks this weekend. It will be a photographic extravaganza. A photogranza...er something. Yeah, that didn't work, you can ignore it.

I apologize to everyone I am not keeping up with well. I just feel like I am in a fog. Kinda like Gracie in Susan's story. Yet, Gracie seems to have her wits about her, which is something I lack right now. My critical thinking and decision making skills have gone down the toilet. I hope to get them back over a long restful weekend.

Hopefully more tomorrow.

Blessings,

Big J

The Truth About Men and Football

2006-08-24T13:41:00.000-07:00

I am posting something here that I stole from Liz that she stole from elsewhere...er, I mean...came up with all on her own because she is so original ;) I really like it and most aspect of it apply to me. I have changed a few of them so that they better fit me as a man. For the originals, check Liz's blog. But then again, since you are all so faithful to check my blog frequently and visit all of my links frequently (and, hey, there aren't that many), you have already seen it. Anyway, it is just a must see to be understood, and they are all numbered "1" on purpose. So without further ado:

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Football season. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. "Yes" and "No" are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act (or look) like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, just don't ask us. Again, ask directly for what you want a compliment; don't fish to set us up for failure just so you have an excuse to yell at someone or guilt trip us into buying you flowers.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...

1. If you ask us what we're thinking and we say "nothing," we really mean "nothing." Yes, a blank state of mind is possible without constantly repeating "Ommm" like a dork.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Truth be told, if I am sleeping on the couch, it is my own free choice. I always figure if Jen wants to remain so angry at me about something that she doesn't want to sleep in the same room as I do rather than attempt to be understanding and work it out, she can find another place to sleep. Here's another one: 1. If I am tired and you want to argue, I am going to sleep. Deal with it.

These all seem a little harsh, harsher than I am in real life. God has dealt Jen and I some irony in our relationship. I had to teach her how to enjoy shopping. She does now, and we have a great time when we go. She is sensitive enough to not ask me to go unless it is really crucial for me to when there is a key football match-up going on at that time. She actually enjoys watching football, eating pizza, and having a good beer almost as much as I do, so I feel like I am a very lucky man. She also like to play video games :) It always makes me proud to say those things. So, generally, unless there is something really important to draw us away, she doesn't want to miss Michigan vs. Notre Dame or Civil War weekend either. She's a good woman. I told her the other night that I felt sorry for every other man on earth because I married her and took her off the market. Now they are stuck with having to choose from all the other women that are left. Most days I really feel that way.

Has anyone else ever heard of or been to a "Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage" event? Mark Gungor is a former pastor who puts these conferences on. He is good. He says that men have what is called a "nothing box." It is where we go to escape the pressures of the world and relax. So, if you ever ask your husband what he is thinking about and he says, "Nothing," he really means it. It is not a good idea to yank a man out of his nothing box just to argue with him about how he couldn't really be thinking about nothing. That is a cardinal sin. Think about this one logically: if a man can be so content to do nothing, why could he not be happy to think about nothing? Like on "King of the Hill," Hank and his pals stand in the alley drinking Alamo and saying "Yup" for hours on end without bringing anything up. Could they really have anything running through their minds if they were happy doing this for hours on end? The hamsters that power our brains have to take naps to recover from life. Those are just such times. So, be sensitive and don't just wake up your husband's hamster with the crack of a whip and drive him hard. Not all men have a nothing box, and some women have a nothing box (my gal included), but I think this holds as a general rule.

I have been reformed. I lend Jen a sympathetic ear for long periods of time, and I ask if she really wants advice before I give it. I don't think that should only be the role of girlfriends. That is a neanderthal mindset.

The one about something being interpretable in two different ways is so true. I can't tell you how much grief could be saved if many women would think twice before getting angry about something.

The one about asking if something is wrong and getting "nothing" for the reply is so true. Not only is it not worth it, but it is being disingenuous and lying to say "nothing." If you have something on your mind you aren't ready to talk about, just be honest about it. Also, be civil when you bring it up.

I know I am probably preaching to the choir here. These marital issues have just been so irksome at some point in my marriage that they stroke that sore spot a little. I am by no means saying that I was perfect and Jen had much to work on. I was one tough, self-righteous, and defensive nut to crack. In the end, it wasn't we who changed each other, but God who changed us. I am really thankful for where we are in our marriage. When one of us slights the other, we are able to love and show grace. We are also able to talk about it later without arguing (most of the time, anyway).

I do wonder how people who see my blog view me. I was telling Niki in an email the other day that my blog is the pasture for the horses of my personality that don't get exercised very often. I feel like I come across as harsh and one-dimensional sometimes. There is more to me than my work-life, education, and the NFL. I am a man who is searching for God. The journey is a little confusing at this point, but I am trying to work through that. I don't love Him as deeply as I should, but I am always striving to do better. I have a currently unfulfilled passion for theology and New Testament Greek. I have been waiting for some down-time to pursue that, and they will have to wait a while. Maybe they will get picked up in late winter or early spring. I do love and adore my wife. I am the man that I am today because I got married. Without her influence in my life, I wouldn't be as far along in the maturation process than I am. I have a real heart for teens and kids in need of someone to provide them with affirmation and affection. It has always been a part of my ministry plans to incorporate these aspects, and I have. I also have a real heart for missionaries. In most churches, missionaries are like the red-headed step-children of the ministry staff. They deserve more love and support from their sending and home churches than they often get. I love the glass harmonica. If you have ever heard the most famous movement of music from The Nutcracker Suite, you have probably heard it before. It is the enchanting instrument used during what I believe is called "The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies." It was invented by Ben Franklin and enjoyed great success until the piano became more accessible and over took it in popularity. I am very anxious to be able to have kids, buy a small farm in South Dakota, and settle down. Land is cheap enough to buy a decent chunk back there. And I love my momma. Not as pathologically as Bobby Boucher, but I love her, and I am not afraid to say it on my cell phone in public when I talk to her. Or my dad, for that matter. Oh, and I love Christmas. This year, I am going to celebrate the full advent season from December 1 to January 6 (the Feast of Epiphany).

My obligatory weird and useless fact: Frogs use their eyeballs to push food down their throat. You ever wondered why they blink/close their eyes when there is food in their mouth? Now you know!

Here is today's quiz. It is all about honesty. It asks some leading questions that might be tough to answer, but just answer as if the two options presented are your only two options. I would never tell my sister straight up that an outfit made her look really fat. I would do it sensitively by pointing out positives or be honest that it isn't flattering. Those weren't options, though. It's either, "You look like a water-retaining sea cow" or "Of course you don't look fat in that." At least, that was how I read it.

You Are Very Honest

You tell it like it is, no matter what.
Even if the truth hurts, you'll dish it out.
And while some may get hurt by your honesty...
At least everyone knows where you stand!

How Honest Are You?

Well, it is time to take this post out behind the barn with the twelve gauge. It is getting too long, and I am sure that y'all have probably had enough. I know I am a wind-bag. I have had a lot on my mind the last few days. Thanks for listening and for your prayers.

Blessings

Big J

Packing in the Laughs

2006-08-23T16:49:00.000-07:00

It is a beautiful day here in the Pacific Northwest. The clouds and rain have returned, as have the sane temperatures (below 70 degree F). I got slightly sprinkled as I walked out to my car and from my car into work today. I love it. I am not a summer guy. I'll take 2 weeks of sunshine in June, but give me clouds, cool breezes, and rain the rest of the time. I was born and raised in the beautiful Willamette Valley in Oregon. I am convinced that not blood, but the pure, deep blue water of the valley courses through my veins. Sunshine is boring. It never changes. Precipitation is always different, be it the amount or the variety. I love it.

I am currently reading a book called A History of the World in 6 Glasses. It is history of the last 10,000 years viewed through the achievement of making stuff to drink and how it advanced civilization. The six glasses, in chronological order, are: beer, wine, distilled spirits, coffee, tea, and pop (that's right, pop. That is what you say here in the Pacific Northwest). Aside from the fact that the author doesn't do very much to cite his resources of his scientific postulations (which bugs me to no end. Good authors and researchers cite their work), it is a very intriguing and interesting book. I love different stuff like this. It is this kind of stuff that I want my kids to read in school because it is how real history happens and is recorded.

There are fewer things in life I hate than the perpetuation of ridiculous fallacies, but perpetuation of ridiculous fallacies paired with fetishism or fanaticism really grates my cheddar. There is a woman in Florida who will make a human style wig for your dog. I saw it in one of the blurbs on the odd stories page of World magazine. She says that dogs are just little people with fur coats...5...4...3...2...1...WHAT IN THE HECK DOES SHE THINK SHE EVEN KNOWS ABOUT DOGS! She is not a scientist, dog trainer or breeder, or anything relating to the field of dogs. She is just this creepy old lady who makes wigs. Now, I wouldn't explode all over her if I met her. I can rant here on my blog. I would expose her to the great fallacy that she embraces and introduce her to what the truth about dogs is. Dogs are not humans. Their brain doesn't function like humans. If a dog gets cancer, it doesn't think, "I wish I would have taken a trip to Russia." The dog wants a comfortable place to lay down, some affection, and a little non-rigorous exercise as nature takes its course. Dogs don't have conscious memories. They are conditioned, by intention or accident, to respond to things in certain ways, but they don't worry about if there will be enough dog food to get through the rest of the week. They live completely in the moment. A dog can be an important part of a family. I still remember my sweet chocolate lab, Nicole, with tears in my eyes. That dog was so well balanced naturally that as messed up as my family was, she became the balancing force. But they are still animals, not humans. Like a deer, rabbit, or puma, they live in the here and now. So, the next time you hear a person make an ignorant statement about their dog, please correct them...at least for the sake of their dog.

Rant over, it's fun time. Here is an interesting little bit on the origin of the word "manure."

Farming required constant manual labor. This was especially true with fertilizer, which had to be mixed by hand. Some folks objected to the use of the word "dung" to refer to animal excrement, so they used the more refined, euphemistic "manure," which comes from the Latin manu operati, meaning "to work by hand."

Speaking of manure, here is a funny anecdote about manure and Harry S. Truman:
One day in 1951, President Truman was explaining farming to some city folks. "It means manure, manure, and more manure," he said. A lady in attendance whispered to first lady Bess Truman, "You should teach Harry to say 'fertilizer,' not 'manure.'" Mrs. Truman replied, "You don't know how long it took me to get him to say 'manure.'"

You know, the RoadRunner on the old Looney Tunes is depicted as this fast as lightning creature, but, truth be told, their top speed is like 15 mph. A dog could easily run one of them little suckers down.

Here is a weird fact: Eskimos traditionally use walrus whiskers as tooth picks. If most of my food was nearly frozen, I would be hunting a lot of walrus.

Further evidence that Europe continues to slide down the toilet: In January 2005, a judge in Breda, Netherlands, officially ruled that a 46-year-old bank robber who got away with $8,400 could only be charged with a crime worth about $6,100. Why? Because the court had to let the man offset the equivalent of the $2,300 that he paid for his gun as a legitimate business expense. I don't think I could add anything to this, ala commentary. It really speaks for itself.

I don't know how they figured this one out or how it would be validated, but scientists have found that whales dream. Weird. But of course, if you watch SpongeBob Squarepants, you would already know this from the episode where he invades the dreams of his friends in Bikini Bottom and barges in on the dreams of Pearl, Mr. Krabs' daughter. See, television is educating.

Here are some archaic words that you could not possibly live another minute without knowing. Believe me:

Faffle: to stutter or mumble
Dasypygal: having hairy buttocks
Cornobbled: hit with a fish
Calcographer: one who draws with chalk
Bodewash: cow dung
Liripoop: a silly creature
Leptorrhinian: having a long, narrow nose
Whipjack: a beggar pretending to have been shipwrecked
Xystus: an indoor porch for exercising in winter
(spell check totally freaked out over these words)

I wonder what the etymology is on these words? How funny, huh? So, the next time those kids get out of hand, call them rascally liripoops. That should fix them good, eh? I wish I knew how to pronounce dasypygal. That is just too funny.

Here is some actually edifying information:

Clouds normally appear white when the light which strikes them is scattered by the small ice or water particles from which they are composed. However, as the size of these ice and water particles increases "as it does just before clouds begin to deposit rain" this scattering of light is increasingly replaced by absorption. As a result, much less light reaches the observer on the ground below and the clouds look darker. That is a pretty nifty little fact, huh? I have loved weather science since I was in grammar school.

I just had to share this story to get it off my chest. It is a little disturbing. As I was driving to work today, I saw what I thought to be a visquene like plastic bag in the middle of the road with the tied end whipping in the wind. Then I thought, "Hmm, that's odd. I don't see the trees, grass, or bushes moving. No cars are passing it or over it either. What gives?" As I got closer, to my dismay, I saw that it was a squirrel that made an unsuccessful attempt to cross the road. He was only partially hit, but definitely deceased. What I thought was the tied end of a bag whipping in the wind was his tail twirling around in circles because his nerves were crossed :( Gross. I became physically ill after I realized what I had seen. I used to hunt squirrels. I think it was the nature of the fatal injury that got my stomach worked up in knots.

I know you all really want another disturbing fact, so here's one to keep you awake at night: You inhale about 700,000 of your own skin flakes daily. This is one of those facts that is very disturbing to learn, but after you think about it and realize that you still get up happy and healthy every morning, or at least no more ill due to this, you are fine. That one didn't give me chills.

So my last hurrah for this very long posting is my obligatory quiz. It isn't completely accurate, but I am a bit obsessive compulsive. Even if I know I locked the door of our apartment, and neither my wife or I have gone in or out all evening, I still have to check it before I go to bed. I can't sleep well if I don't. I'm a reformed perfectionist, too. Thankfully, I have gotten most of that worked out of my system. Oh, and I do wash my hands too often during the day. I didn't before I worked this job though. After seeing how many of the people here never wash their hands after using the bathroom, though, it threw my obsessiveness about it into full gear.

You May Be a Bit Obsessive Compulsive...

Meticulous and detailed oriented, you have some irrational obsessions.
Maybe it's your super neat closet or washing your hands a gazillion times.
You probably know it's weird, but you just can't stop thinking about it.
In fact, the more you think about your quirks, the more you have to do them.

What Personality Disorder Are You?

I hope everyone had a good laugh at today's posting. I wanted to pack some laughs in here to lighten the mood and spread some cheer.

Blessings to you all.

Big J

Thanks For The Prayers

2006-08-22T12:16:00.000-07:00

Well, I am writing you from work today. You may notice that it is a much earlier post. That is thanks to all of your prayers. My shift was change over the weekend on a probationary basis. Please keep praying. I want it to be affirmed as permanent. But, thanks to the faithfulness of y'all and the goodness of God, I will be having dinner with my wife when I get off of work at 7:30 tonight! Thank you all so much. Your prayers have and continue to carry me through this time. Please keep praying. I have just been in a state of unbelievable ecstasy today. My wife will not be comatose on the couch or in bed when I get home!!!

I had some dental work done yesterday, hence no post. I had a wisdom tooth pulled and a filling done. They were both on the right side/top of my mouth. I got 2 Xanex from my mom for the anxiety, and my dentist was pretty proficient with the anesthetic needles, thank freakin' goodness. So, the combination of those 2 got me through. Truth be told, the only things hurting today are my jaw and sinuses where he put all the pressure to reef my tooth out, and the holes in my mouth where he stuck the needles to deliver the anesthesia. I haven't taken anything for pain since 9 PM last night and I feel fine. That is a real answer to prayer.

I have had diversity crammed down my throat lately with my last class in my structured program, and dealing with issues at work. What I want to know is, why are we Americans, especially those of us of the US white-male variety, expected to be all tolerant and accepting of other cultures, but it is considered completely acceptable for others from other cultures or genders to be intolerant of us and our culture? If we do something American that offends their culture, it is deemed acceptable for them to chew us out, be offended, and/or walk off in a hizzy. Yet, if they do something that totally offends our cultural sensibilities, we are just supposed to suck it up and act all mature. It peeves me. So, here is my tribute to "cultural awareness/sensitivity" The Ultimate Children's Diversity Book It always makes me feel better to see it. Now, don't get me wrong, I love other cultures and different people, I just hate double-standards with a passion because I belong the most blamed group in America (Christian, married, heterosexual, middle-class {lower-middle to be exact} white male, ages 18 to 49) for other peoples misfortunes, even though I never intentionally directly or indirectly contribute to their misfortune. You get sick of hearing it after a while, especially when you work hard to be part of the solution.

Here is my obligatory quiz. I hope most of y'all are coffee lovers. I know I am. Thanks again to Liz for pushing me back to check out Blogthings.

Caramel Frappuccino

Creative and expressive, you tend to match your Frappuccino flavor to your mood. And a flavored syrup is always a must!

What Flavor Frappuccino Are You?

Truth is good quality coffee don't need no stinking flavored syrup. If you don't think so, you have never had good coffee (and almost everything sold at Starbucks does not qualify as good coffee).

Well, I suppose that is all. Funny stuff tomorrow. Life is good.

Blessings

Big J

Back by Public Demand

2006-08-18T18:19:00.000-07:00

Okay, alright already! Sheesh, you's peoples is houndin' me. I suppose now I know what it is like to live with the demands of throngs of adoring fans. Huh, huh, yeah right. Anyway, I have received many requests by y'all to let you know what next in my life since I am finishing up my degree. Well, I have 3 more classes to do, plus a DANTES for public speaking before I am totally done with my degree. Plus, I have this Independent Study Project that I have to complete, and every time I have started it with an organization, it has totally fallen through. So, I'll be working on all of that this Fall, along with trying to fit in as much NFL and college football as possible.

I wish I could say that this is going to lead to new job opportunities and that I would have the ability to make more money and do this or that, but I would be lying. Honestly, I am barely getting by at work. I have come to terms with it, but I am the red-headed step-child of my department. I am not really liked or advocated for, so I have been put somewhere way far out of the way so that I can be completely ignored. That is why I have so much time to blog and respond to postings on other blogs. Let me just say that my work history is a complex picture, and it wouldn't be advantageous for me to leave my current job soon. I have a lot of short stays and long periods of unemployment. I have been victim to office politics and dramatic shifts in demand in the economy, so I am not a very attractive hire from a work history perspective. So I am riding the wave here to see what comes along. I would be delighted if Jen and I could move to South Dakota here in the near future, and we are trying to see what we can make happen there. Property is pretty cheap. We're in the research phase right now, and I'll reveal more as I find out more. This is a ways off, though.

In January of 2008, I intend to start work on my MS in Mental Health Counseling through Capella University. No rest for the wicked, if you know what I mean. I may have mentioned that I am doing it there earlier, but I don't remember. It is a real twofer deal on their degrees. Their degree in Mental Health Counseling and their other degree in Marital, Couple, and Family Counseling/Therapy are only 12 credits, an extra 1,000 hours of supervised counseling experience, and two more six day residencies apart from each other. It is like, get one degree for about $36,000, or get two for about $40,000. It seems like a no brainer. But, one thing at a time, I suppose.

That is all I have in me tonight. Here is my obligatory quiz. Thanks, Liz, for the blogthings.com reference. I decided to go back an see if there was anything else I could cull from there and there was. It is the "Celebrity Baby Name" generator. At least I didn't get "Apple" something. Who do these movie stars think they are, naming their child something that dumb. By the way, Dustin, thanks for naming your next one after me.

Your Celebrity Baby Name Is...

Romeo Piper

What's Your Celebrity Baby Name?

Blessings,

Big J

Greed and Punishment

2006-08-17T17:14:00.000-07:00

First and foremost, a big thanks to Niki for the blog love. I made serious mention in one of her most recent posts. Of course, you all knew that because you are faithful to frequently click on the links that I have off to the left here. So, thanks Niki. You were my first link, and I always look forward to your new posts. Go check her out. She has some really compelling stuff on over zealous government intervention and weird family traditions over her last couple of posts. But, why am I telling you all what you already know (wink, wink). Secondly, Kiersten is like the gold star queen this week. Much kudos to you for following those links. I love reading your comments elsewhere on the net, and it makes me feel like I know you just a little bit better every time. Way cool.

Free food rocks. It is even better when it comes in the form of nature’s bounty. I was led down this train of thought just now as I was finishing up a bag of my favorite flavor (or flavour for my friends across the pond) of Doritos, Black Pepper Jack. Being greedy has a price to pay sometimes. I love the little chip fragments at the bottom. They are always the most flavorful, and you get the ecstasy filled rush of MSG in you mouth for the few precious seconds as you are chewing them. Well, I was having a little trouble getting at the very last bit of them. I angled the bag a little off to the side, yet still firmly into my mouth (so I thought), to try to jiggle them loose. A short second later I felt the uncomfortable and embarrassing sensation of those fragments running down my shirt and intermingling with my chest hair. I am thankful that no one was looking as that happened because it must have looked terribly ridiculous. Then again, so does a grown man with a huge, nearly empty bag of Doritos aimed at his face, jiggling to get that last little bit at the bottom.

By now, you are probably wondering what this has to do with free food. In a word, “Blackberries.” My folks pick blackberries every year to make fresh blackberry pie, blackberry wine, and plenty of other country favorites. And, if you are smart, you get your own for free here in the Pacific Northwest. There is nary a roadside outside of a town that does not have them growing on it, and there are even plenty in town that do. There are brambles just full of them not too far from our apartment complex. We even saw a homeless guy today picking some for food. Had I been sharper, I would have stopped and given that guy a couple of bucks. I always respect someone not afraid to work for their own food. Anyway, we call it berry greed. You start picking, and you look just a bit deeper into the bramble where you can get your arm, and there are some nice juicy ones waiting to be picked. You get those, then just a bit beyond them are some really huge, nice, ripe, juicy blackberries calling your name. You abandon all common sense and begin to stick your arm in there. You get a few off that vine and attempt to remove your hand. Ouch, ow, ouch, dangit! Another victim fallen prey to the temptation of berry greed. Using the hand pruners reduces the injuries resulting from said condition, but you can’t just go cutting any vine all willy-nilly. Many vines in the way contain large clusters of immature fruit that you will be back to gather a week or two later. So, a word to the wise, greed can be a green-eyed monster, so beware you don’t get pricked…or dump a bunch of chip fragments down your shirt and get that flavored powder all over your chest.

Enough life lessons for the day, I demand frivolity!

Why is it that when you are talking about hail you use sports balls as the gauge of size (golf ball, baseball, etc), but when you talk about tumors the metaphor turns to fruit (orange, grapefruit, plum)? If someone could explain to me how this originated, I would be much obliged. It is just plain weird.

Here are some very strange, some borderline disturbing headlines:
Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins ParentsState Says Cost of Saving Money Too HighMAN STEALS CLOCK, FACES TIMESummer Schools Boost ScroresSTUDY SAYS SNORING DRIVERS HAVE MORE ACCIDENTSWomen Bowlers Vote to Keep Their Skirts OnAstronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

I am having severe trouble finding cool quizzes. Anyone who could point me to a good quiz site (where they aren’t all written by 13 year-old girls) I would be indebted to. That is all for today.

Blessings,

Big J

Bad News and Good News

2006-08-16T14:41:00.000-07:00

I am a bad news first kind of guy. Maybe that makes me different, but I would rather be less excited about something great or to have the sunshine of good news completely overtake the shadows of bad news than have bad new completely crush my elation. I am a pretty even-steven kind of guy. I am passionate; I have strong emotions; Yet I would rather be fair to middland most of the time then on constant highs or lows.

I need to cut this discussion of bad news philosophy off before it completely dominates this post. Okay, bad news, office politics are keeping me from my annual trip to the Jeep Jamboree with my dad. Maybe next year. I only get a week, though, so I am beginning to be enticed into starting my own business and get out of the corporate world. I got accused of wanting to stretch the rules just for me. I'm not talking about it much because I am still really baking over this. I am trying hard not to compromise my witness. I could definitely use some prayer on having a forgiving spirit here.

The good news...well, I need some prayer about this but my boss talked to me about possibly moving to a shift that ends at 7pm instead of the current 11pm. He said he can't guarantee it, but he wants to make it happen and he will have the authority to do so soon. Please pray that this happens. I would love to be able to eat dinner with my wife every night. It would change my life for much more than just the better.

Okay, it is fun time. Fast facts that rock: You can think 625 thoughts on the caloric energy of one Cheerio. What is your excuse to not read more now?

On this date in 2004, Orlando, Florida, was ravaged by Hurricane Charley. Its 140-mph winds uprooted trees, tore down power poles, and damaged or destroyed thousands of homes and businesses. The storm also killed 32 people. One of the few things left standing in Orlando was a billboard. The current advertisement had been ripped off by the winds, revealing the message beneath that had been covered up: “WE NEED TO TALK, GOD.” I'm sure most people are familiar with these billboards by now. They have been around for the better part of ten years. This puts a whole new spin on the meaning, huh?

Sometimes things are just so funny that it would be a crime not to share. The next piece is one of those: In 2002, while a Danish man was having surgery performed on his backside, he farted and set his private parts on fire. A surgeon was removing a mole on his bottom with an electric knife, which ignited the expelled gas, producing a flame which set light to his genitals, which had been washed with surgical spirit. The 30-year-old man is suing the hospital for pain and suffering. The head surgeon, Dr. Jorn Kristensen, said: "No one considered the possibility he would break wind. It was an unfortunate accident." —British Nursing News
It sure "stinks" to be right. It would be better if this dude had a better sense of humor about it.

Here is something that is completely useless for me, but might be useful for you, my faithful readers, especially if you have missionary friends working in China. Check out this web-site: http://www.callchinaforfree.com/?gclid=CKKirsuU5YYCFSxmDgod9ToCBw You can actually call China "for free." You must dial an Iowa number first, so long distance charges or cell phone minutes will still be charged if it isn't a local number, but, from those numbers you will be prompted to punch in the Chinese or Hong Kong land line or cell phone number, and there is no additional charge to do that. Pretty sweet, huh?

Here's a fun little quiz. The questions read a little bit like they were written by an adolescent, but if you just give your best answer, it works out, and it is fun. Here's my result:

What obsolete skill are you?

You are 'Latin'. Even among obsolete skills, the tongue of the ancient Romans is a real anachronism. With its profusion of different cases and conjugations, Latin is more than a language; it is a whole different way of thinking about things.You are very classy, meaning that you value the classics. You value old things, good things which have stood the test of time. You value things which have been proven worthy and valuable, even if no one else these days sees them that way. Your life is touched by a certain 'pietas', or piety; perhaps you are even a Stoic. Nonetheless, you have a certain fascination with the grotesque and the profane. Also, the modern world rejects you like a bad transplant. Your problem is that Latin has been obsolete for a long time.
Take this quiz!

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That is all for today. We'll catch y'all on the flipside.

Blessings,

Big J

Cheating

2006-08-15T15:16:00.000-07:00

Would you look at that great line-up of blogs I've got there? Every last one of them a jewel, and there is still room for more. You could visit all of the blogs in my links section and still not be overwhelmed. I hope to keep it that way.

I am going to cheat a little bit today, but it is because I wanted to share something with you. I appeared as a mystery blogger on Dustin's (aka TacoDave) blog, as Niki alluded to. I even linked to the post, but got very little response to it. Besides, it is nice having it on my own blog for posterity's sake. Keep in mind as you read along that I was attempting to be a "mystery blogger" so names and gender references are absent. So, without further ado, here is my mystery blogger post.

“WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU! WHY WON’T YOU LISTEN TO ME?!” I heard as I walked out and slammed our apartment door. We had been fighting for the majority of the day and I was weary from it. I had had enough of the screaming, so I was determined to get out and clear my head for an hour or so.

I was so frustrated by the situation. When we had gotten married, we seemed like the perfect couple. Madly in love and desperate for each other, we clung to one another to weather the storms that late adolescence had brought our way. We had both left dysfunctional homes filled with conflict, and married so that we might find a home with each other that had peace. Yet, this was pretty common for at least one day of a weekend and plenty of our evenings during the week. Arguing for hours on end, what the hell had gone wrong?

I walked around the tall redwoods in the park area of our apartment complex and finally settled on a bench that was in the back of a garden area, far out of the way of where people tended to meander. It was late morning, and I was fortunate that the sun was out and shining down on me because it was a slightly chilly early autumn day. I sat there, sunk deep into my blue hoodie, contemplating the sorrowful situation I was in. I began to wishfully brood, “Well, it is too late to have the marriage annulled, but I don’t have anything of value to lose if it ends now and we split our belongings.” I shook my head, “No,” I surmised, “I couldn’t do that. Maybe it was the biggest mistake of my life, but I made it, and I am not going to cop out now because it is tough,” I shuddered, “no matter how miserable it makes me for the rest of my life.”

I began to pray and ask God to come in and fix what was so obviously broken. “You put us together, Lord, don’t let us fall apart,” I thought. I sat and waited…nothing came. A person walked past in the distance. A car drove up the driveway out of the complex. A gust of wind came. Then clouds began to roll in. I figured this was probably the Lord’s way of telling me that enough time had passed, and that I should go inside to confront the situation.

I wish I could tell you that that specific event was a turning point in our marriage…it wasn’t. Honestly, little changed over the next five and a half years. Truly tragic events came and went. We would celebrate what there was to celebrate…and we continued to argue like a black person and a member of the KKK. I spent many days wondering how much more I could take.

Yet, take it I did. Life continued to move forward, and that wasn’t about to be stopped by anything, not even our discontent with being married to one another. Through school, severe-injuries, work, and long-droughts of unemployment, we stuck with each other. We weren’t perfect supporters of one another’s dreams, but we did support them and encourage each other to strive for them, doing what we could and taking appropriate risks to make them happen.

I woke up one morning about a week ago, and the thought ran through my head that, for the first time since I have been married, I am actually happy to be married to my spouse. We don’t argue or bicker about small things anymore. Our disagreements last a few moments, rather than days or hours. We admit fault when we wrong one another, and we show sympathy for each other’s hurts and struggles. I wish I could tell you that I swallowed a magic pill the night before, and it cured everything. Scratch that, I don’t wish I could tell you that. We paid our dues for our marriage. Now just being a normal, stable, and happy couple is worth a tremendous amount. The road here was paved with pain, suffering, and sacrifice. When many couples faced similar struggles, we saw them decide to divorce. We trudged on, and we are better off and happier for it. Rather than live with the ghosts and shadows of our past haunting us for the rest of our lives because of a painful, failed marriage, we live in hope of the sunrise we see coming before us. It is a new day in our marriage.

I still harken back to that day sitting on that bench, and I think about what would have happened in my life had I made the wrong decision. I really don’t know. But there are things that I truly do know: I am glad that I made the right decision; God is faithful to keep together those who join in the covenant of marriage; last but not least, it was totally worth it, and if I had to do it all over again, I would more gladly pay that price to get where I am today.

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Just in case you needed reassurance that most Americans are not all that intelligent, here is a story in Reuters News Service "Oddly Enough" category.

Three quarters of Americans can correctly identify two of Snow White's seven dwarfs while only a quarter can name two Supreme Court Justices, according to a poll on pop culture released on Monday.

According to the poll by Zogby International, commissioned by the makers of a new online game on pop culture called "Gold Rush," 57 percent of Americans could identify J.K. Rowling's fictional boy wizard as Harry Potter, while only 50 percent could name the British prime minister, Tony Blair.

The pollsters spoke to 1,213 people across the United States. The results had a margin of error of 2.9 percentage points.

Just over 60 percent of respondents were able to name Bart as Homer's son on the television show "The Simpsons," while only 20.5 percent were able to name one of the ancient Greek poet Homer's epic poems, "The Iliad" and "The Odyssey."

Asked what planet Superman was from, 60 percent named the fictional planet Krypton, while only 37 percent knew that Mercury is the planet closest to the sun.

Respondents were far more familiar with the Three Stooges -- Larry, Curly and Moe -- than the three branches of the U.S. government -- judicial, executive and legislative. Seventy-four percent identified the former, 42 percent the latter.

Twice as many people (23 percent) were able to identify the most recent winner of the television talent show "American Idol," Taylor Hicks, as were able to name the Supreme Court Justice confirmed in January 2006, Samuel Alito (11 percent).

Here is the link: http://go.reuters.com/newsArticle.jhtml?type=oddlyEnoughNews&storyID=13192218

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Here is my obligatory quiz for the day. I know I have been slacking, but I am running out of good material. It is hard to find cool quiz sites that let you take quizzes for free and don't have horribly obscene or objectionable material on them. But this one is pretty funny. Y'all should take it.

Your Cereal Personality: Count Chocula
Take This Quiz!	You were a cereal icon, the Count. I see 1, 2, 3... 3 marshmallows ah ah ah! You were the leader of a motley crew that included Boo Berry and Franken Berry. You could turn milk into chocolate milk and turn yourself into a bat. Magic.

Blessings,

Big J

Blog Love

2006-08-14T21:06:00.000-07:00

How about the blog love I'm getting. Seven comments on my last entry! You guys rock! Keep coming back and I will try to keep delivering.

I have a little to make up for. I have a blog I should have linked to earlier and have talked about. I blog I should have talked about earlier and have linked to. And I have a new blog coming on that I haven't talked about and haven't linked to. By the end of the day, these glaring omissions will be righted.

I'll go in order that I have them listed up there. Jennifer is a fairly prolific blogger with multiple blogs. Sadly, I like the one that she doesn't update as frequently as most others. Her Talk About Words Blog is randomness that comes out half fun, half serious. Maybe we just connect well, but I really enjoy her stuff. It either makes you contemplate things a little, or it is just plain fun.

I have had a link to Justin's blog for a while now. As a matter of fact, I couldn't tell you how long ago I linked to him. Justin is a pastor at a church in Canada, and has just been one (vocationally) for about six months. He has a real unique perspective on things. He is just too dang funny sometimes, too. He adds a little south of the border flavor to my link section.

I have just linked up with Liz aka "Looney Bin 4 Sure." I found her through Kiersten's cool blog. She is a married mother of 6, and she is passionate about her faith. Well, I must say that I could say that about everybody I linked to. I have been purposeful in that. We are all a bunch of Jesus Freaks tossed in together. That is what I have really hoped to achieve. Anyway, sorry Liz, I'll get back to you now. She suffers from chronic depression, but she works hard to be victorious in that, and she is a real encouragement to those around her. For those of us here in blogland, if she didn't say, you would never know. She is also an aspiring web-developer. You have to check out all of the cool stuff she has on her blog.

That is about it. I wanted to thank everyone for their love, support, and prayers. I have really felt them over the last few days. Your love has lifted my spirits high. Keep coming back. I'll have more cool jazz for y'all soon.

Blessings

Big J

Confessions and Obsessions

2006-08-11T20:07:00.000-07:00

I got a little bit of everything in this post, so let’s get it going.

I feel the need to confess some sin today. I really don’t have any mature Christian man who is involved in my life, which I desperately wish were different. If I were in a discipleship relationship, I would confess my sins there, but the word discipleship has been twisted to mean general training in any setting in the modern church, rather than Jesus:John, Peter, James or Timothy:Paul. I’ll get back to my point. I live in the Portland, OR area where there is a massive homeless population. The most visible tend to be the ones who are meth users or alcoholics who bum money for booze and drugs. Today, I saw someone who was different. He was holding a sign that seemed really genuine. His countenance did not look like that of a man who has been using illegal drugs or a drunkard. He looked quite clean. One key tell for me was that he looked horribly uncomfortable standing there, holding his sign. It was not the look of a person who had come to terms with such a thing. I didn’t stop. I drove right past him. I told myself I’d be late for work if I helped. I told myself that, since I was depressed, I just needed to head home. I told myself that it would take forever to get something for him to eat. I told myself every half-truth I needed to hear to drive right by him. My conscience bears witness against me in this, and has all day. I beg the forgiveness of God Almighty, for I saw his Son hungry and I did not feed Him; thirsty, yet I gave Him no water; naked, and I did not clothe Him. I wish it were as simple as saying Hail Marys or paying for indulgences. I wish I could pray for hours to rid myself of how I feel about what I did. I wish, I wish, I wish. I thought about how full I was from the lunch I was returning from with my wife. I thought about how warm I was because of the pull-over I had on. I thought about how comfortable I was driving around in my newer (1994) vehicle. I feel ashamed, and I should. Maybe he will be there Monday, maybe not, but I hope he is. My heart hurts because of this. Oh Lord, make me more action oriented in my love for You, that You might use me to minister to the least of these. I do give to my local homeless mission that is in the business of changing lives in real and tangible ways, coupled with faithfully preaching the gospel. I do have a heart for these people who truly want help. I just failed today. I failed big time. May my brothers and sisters and God above forgive me for this failure. I desperately don’t want to make the same mistake twice.

Video games. Few things invoke such a variety of responses from so many people as the word video games. I am here to tell you why you should buy the Nintendo Wii, though. It is the next console system that is coming out for Nintendo in the fourth quarter of this year. At E3 in 2005, Jackie Chan was there promoting this little system that was rather puny and lacking called Xavix (pronounced “zavicks”). It was a one-trick pony with a cause: to get your kid’s butt off the couch and moving while playing video games. It had wired motion detectors that you strapped to your hands and feet, or it had a racket (for tennis) or bat (for baseball) that you swung at appropriate times. What Xavix failed to do, the Wii masters. You see, the Nintendo Wii has a wireless controller that looks a little bit like a TV remote. They have a tennis game, a baseball game, and a golf game which all comes on one disk, and for which the players use the control in the same fashion as they would a bat, a racket, or a golf club. It will have other “getcha butt up off da couch” type games for the console, as well. It will have numerous kid friendly titles, along with some more mature ones, that will be released either with or very near to the console launch. It is really a console for the whole family. You will be able to wirelessly download most games from the NES, SNES, N64, Sega Genesis, and the Turbo Grafix 16 and play them on the console. You see, it connects wirelessly to a home network. I am sure they will have an adapter for home networks that are hard-wired, much like the $20 adapter for the Nintendo DS that is currently available. Not a techie? No problem. You see, the wireless adapter merely plugs into any USB plug-in and is an easy set-up and go that pretty much even your grandma could figure out (even if you are your own grandma). I’ll give you one last very good reason. The launch price is the same as the launch price for the original NES (that’s Nintendo Entertainment System, for you who are the uninitiated) back in 1985: $250. That is a full $100 cheaper than the launch price for the Xbox360, and a full $350 cheaper than the Play Station 3 will launch for. Oh, and they will put so many on the market that you won’t even have to worry about pre-ordering to get one.

Why am I writing all of this (and I know most of you who read my blog probably want to know because most women aren’t too terribly interested in video games) you might ask. This will be the system that you want to play with your kids, if you have them, or you will just want to play, period. I have been a Nintendo loyalist since I was knee-high to a junebug, or, uh, ever since I got my very first taste of Super Mario Brothers at the tender age of 5. I can still remember the very first time I played it. Fast forward and, for about the last decade, Nintendo hasn’t given me anything to be excited about. I felt the N64 underachieved compared to the competing systems (the Play Station, and later Xbox), and I felt the Nintendo Game Cube was a lame attempt to try to compete. Don’t get me wrong, there have been some great Nintendo games over this period of disappointment, but I didn’t buy the N64 until I could pick it up used for $25 at a video game store. The advancements made with the Wii are enough to make me go out and buy one at some time around the launch date. It will forever change the way you look at video games.

Okay, rant over. I was excited but let down when the Nintendo DS launched (though, I am not now, since there are some great games for it). I just had to get that out of my system.

How about some fun facts to redeem this post, huh?

Let’s just say that I found this one too disturbing to be fake: In the 2000 summer Olympic games, marathon champion Naoko Takahashi drank the stomach juices of giant killer hornets to give her performance an ‘extra buzz,’ it was revealed. The Japanese athlete took the unusual beverage before the race after scientists found it boosted human stamina. The hornets, which measure up to 3 inches long, fly the equivalent of two marathons a day looking for food for their young. Scientists in Tokyo have been investigating what gives them the energy to cover such distances. Reports on Monday said that the drink, which is 100 percent natural, did not fall foul of Olympic laws against performance-enhancing drugs.

I’m all for finding a use for rotten pests like hornets, but that is just sick!

Here’s a less disgusting one. This fact is for you Niki: Denver’s international airport is larger than the entire city of Boston. And I thought Chicago’s main airport was big!

How about some weird holidays? This week (August 7-11) is National Psychic’s Week. Betcha didn’t see that one coming (HAH, HAH, HUH, Hah, Hah, huuhhhh…okay, it wasn’t that funny). August 8 through 16 is the week of the Sturgis bike rally. I rolled through South Dakota the week prior to that 10 years ago. Let’s just say I’m happy that I am not around for that.

Now for the days: August 5 was Women’s Pro Football Day. Hey, some chicks were just born to play football. They actually had the Women’s Pro Football National Championship game that day. It was reported on ESPN, but I don’t remember who won. August 6 was National Fresh Breath (halitosis) Day. What a great excuse to give certain people mouthwash. I know several I could give bottles to. Now, if they only had National Don’t Spit While You Talk Day. I know several people who I wish would celebrate that year round. Today, tomorrow and Sunday is Kool-Aid Day. That just doesn’t seem right, but that is what the facts say. I believe that they have a festival in this insignificant little Nebraska town where Kool-Aid’s inventor lived over this weekend (OH YEAH!). Over the weekend, on Saturday we will have Eleanor Roosevelt Day, Elvis Presley Commemoration Day and National Garage Sale Day. Those last two really go together, don’t they? Sunday is a very important day. It celebrates the likes of yours truly. It is National Left-Hander’s Day. Remember to reverse the order of which side you put the milk and which side you put the cookies on the mantle for Clanta Saus. If you were good this year, he’ll bring you a notepad with the binding on the other side! Here is some fun information from this site: http://www.lefthandersday.com/tour5.html

Left-handers have been linguistically abused for centuries! There are hundreds of (mainly abusive) terms for left-handers.
There are a lot of sayings where "right" is good and "left" is bad e.g., "being in your right mind", "the divine right of kings", it will be all right in the end" as against being "left out", having "two left-feet", "a left-handed compliment" (one that is not really meant!).
Even the word for "left-handed" in many languages is very negative:
LANGUAGE
TRANSLATION FOR LEFT-HANDED
MEANING
Greek - Skaios - Ill-omened, awkward
Italian - Mancini - Crooked, maimed
Spanish - Zurdo - Reverse - No Ser Zurdo = Clever
French - Gauche - Awkward, clumsy
Dutch - Linkshandig - To "have two left hands" means to be clumsy.
German - Links, Linkisch - Awkward
Norwegian - Kjevhendt - Crooked-handed (also advised to us as keivhent, left-hander)
Swedish - vänsterhänd
Australia - Mollie Dooker - Something to do with having fists like a girl
Portuguese - canhoto
Latin - Sinister - On the left-hand side
(Also Latin) Dexter - On the right hand side (dextrous)

I think that is it for tonight. Have a good weekend, kiddies.

Blessings,

Big J

Back To My Roots

2006-08-10T14:07:00.000-07:00

I had an epiphany (yes, I kiss my mother with this mouth) late last night after I finished my post. I really feel I have stepped too much away from what I started this blog for. I am a weird facts and fun hi-jinks kind of guy. I think I can address the serious without straying from that, but I really want to put some serious focus back on being who I am. I have realized lately that my depression issues have crept back into my life without my realizing it. I ask all of you around me to please be praying that I would persevere and prevail with the help of the Lord through this time. I want to glorify Him in my life by how I handle what comes my way. I love you all, and I thank you for being my friends and siblings in Jesus. Your words of encouragement continue to carry me back to where I need to be.

Here's a little add on to the issue I dealt with yesterday: http://www.psychologytoday.com/rss/pto-19971101-000019.html I think you'll find it interesting, and maybe helpful to you, someday. You just never know what will happen to you.

So, if you haven't already been to these blogs and read these posts, which I know you have because you are such faithful blogosphere members, you should. Here are the links. http://tacodave.blogspot.com/2006/08/mystery-blogger-2.html#links and http://latenightdrivethru.blogspot.com/2006/08/soapbox.html I'll let other people be serious for me, today. I would like you to please respond to at least one of them in my comments section, though. That is a lot of what my online schooling has been like. Reading and then responding to what we have read and answering open-ended questions about it. I'll spare you asking to do research in peer-reviewed journals on the topics brought up in those postings and then write an 8-10 page paper on the subject, with a ratio of citing at least two unique references per page.

If you haven't been going to Susan's Writeous Blog and reading her book, you have no freakin' clue what you are missing. It may be that her writing style just jives with my personality, but I don't think so. She is a fantastic talent. Chapter 5 comes tomorrow. Go do your back reading to get ready for it. You won't regret it. I am dying for a signed copy when it comes out.

Well, I am ready to get back to the regular silliness. Are you ready for me to cram fun down your throat?! Good!

Here are some interesting fast facts about 7-11:
The most 7-11 Slurpees bought in any one city in the world are purchased in Winnipeg, Manitoba. You can't blame Canuks for having good taste, but I can't say this helps their image as "The Next Most Insane Country, Second Only To France." (And to all of my Canadian friends, you know I am just kidding and that I love you guys) The most sold in any city in the United States is in Detroit. Of course, given Detroit's history and current state, this fact really needs no explanation.

I am resurrecting an old favorite of mine, "Weird Holidays That No One Cares About." Let's begin, shall we. August is "National Win With Civility Month." I think it was started by a frenchman. That would only make sense, wouldn't it? Last week was "World Breastfeeding Week." I actually had no idea how big of a deal that was. My mom breastfed all three of her kids. My wife's mother used formula because, apparently, the very reliable medical science professionals said that formula was better than breast. Gag me with a 1" dowel. I can't believe some of the stupid stuff that medical/nutritional science has said. So, moms out there, do your babies a favor and breast feed. August 1 was Girlfriend's Day. I thought they had gone too far when October 14 was declared "Kid's Day." Apprently, someone else {who seriously needs some sort of mental help} felt differently. What do you do if she's only been your girlfriend for, like, a week? I think this is making the case for courtship for me. It was also "Respect for Parents Day." Outstanding. In his Pro Football Hall of Fame induction speech, Rayfield "Big Cat" Wright told children to respect their elders and honor their parents. He also thanked his childhood Boy Scout master. He ended his speech with the "May the Lord bless you, and keep you, and make His countenance to shine upon you, and give you peace." I'm really sorry I missed yesterday's cool holiday. August 9 is "National Underwear Day." I love underwear! Not like that weirdo in Oregon who got arrested for stealing ladies panties from laundromats, though. No, it wasn't Dustin. Today is "National Duran Duran Appreciation Day." Not until there is a "National Van Halen Appreciation Day," a "National Metallica Appreciation Day," or a "National Guns 'n Roses Appreciation Day," not to mention one for all of the great accomplished classical music composers, will I even consider acknowledging this as any sort of a holiday.

Here is a cool quiz that nailed me on just about everything. Try it and see what you get. Click on "Printable Results" and cut and paste them into the comment section. The Color Quiz is quick, easy, and it was kinda fun.

Jared took the free ColorQuiz.com personality test!

"Intense, vital, and animated, taking a delight in ..."

Click here to read the rest of the results.

That would be all for today. Blessings,

Big J

My Brain Is Broken, Can I Claim Work Comp. For That?

2006-08-09T20:28:00.000-07:00

Oh, the pain of the agony of the ache! Social Security broke my brain again today. I am feeling pretty mindless right now, and...hey...I feel a rant coming on.

It really toasts my biscuits that the constant message of our culture towards people who aren't supermodels is, "You're too fat! Lose weight with our system!" "You're ugly! Buy our makeup!" It is a two-fold problem. There is this competition between the supermodel and fashion-design class of our country to see who can be the skinniest woman, which forces that as the norm to be thrust upon the culture. Then, there are the proverbial "ambulance chasers" who ride the coat-tails of this sick contest. These are the companies that develop all of these weight-loss pills, systems, foods, etc. and then blare it into your home that "you really are too fat, and it isn't just you thinking that; it is the truth" and that you need to lose weight. I used to work at a law firm, and there were some very beautiful women there who had no rational reason to lose weight. Yet, they signed up and went to Weight-Watchers meetings. They went on crash diets. They complained about how fat they were. It was ridiculous!

What this does in the end is cause a person needless constant worry and makes them feel judged for who they are based solely on what they weigh. That isn't right. We need to focus on affirming individuals for who they are. Do you think that if we didn't put so much stress on people to look perfect that we wouldn't have so many who are over-weight? Fewer people would be sent into guilt induced chocolate or ice cream binges. You would have more people focused on the good things in life, increasing the positive natural responses of the body to stimuli like stress. Given, there are some people who are naturally predisposed to be over-weight, but are they truly worth less just because of it? Shouldn't they be allowed to feel beautiful too? Why does being over-weight preclude a person from being beautiful? There are many cultures that consider being "plump" extremely attractive. Western civilization also did for quite some time. It is time that we start looking to see beauty in people, rather than looking to criticize their appearance to find out what makes them less than perfect. Wouldn't that be Christlike of us?

I don't want to sound like I am sanctioning laziness or gluttony. I am not doing that at all. We need to strive to be healthy people. We need to eat the right foods, get exercise, and have a balanced spiritual life. But not everyone who does that to the best of their ability will look like a supermodel, and we need to call a spade a spade and accept that reality. We need to figure out a healthier, more individual affirming way to move forward. What we are doing now isn't working.

Here is a relevant fun fact: At its peak, a growing blue whale gains between 200 and 300 pounds a day. And you thought you gained weight recently.

I wish I had more, but, as I said before, my brain is broken. I am going to investigate the work "compability" of this injury.

Blessings,

Big J

Greetings and Tirades

2006-08-09T00:48:00.000-07:00

Let's all welcome Kiersten. She is a mom who is bi-polar and dealing well with it. Her blog is a testimony of how a true believer faces a mental illness/disorder with faith and wisdom. God bless her for it. So, let's visit her blog frequent and often and show her some support on the under -represented and oft ignored issue of mental illness and the orthodox Christian life of faith. I am thankful to have her in my circle of faith and call her sister.

Now, I know we have enough false -isms to go around, but I have just been contemplating a few issues lately. Ladies and gentleman, racism as a valid issue in daily American exchange is a dead horse. I'm not saying it never happens anymore. It does. But there is a greater injustice in our society that is perpetrated on a daily basis that goes unnoticed. That is the plight of the disabled. I work with these people every day. I hear their stories. Many have been told since the day they were born that they are too retarded to live a full and productive life. I see these people fight the odds on a daily basis, working at a job just like you and me, earning less money for the same work either of us do. They get told that they aren't as worthy of a place in society. Many live in squalor because they can't get a job and must rely on the pathetic benefits our government gives them. If they end up in the system on SSI or working through the county case management, they are often exploited for the benefit and political clout of those managing their cases. The attitude of many Social Security offices is, "I don't care how bad this hurts them, I can cut them off benefits, so I will." I wish that were some sort of exaggeration, but it isn't. If a person is discriminated against because of the color of their skin in applying for 100 jobs over their lifetime out of all of the jobs they apply for (and I have applied for a whole lot more than that), they are still a thousand times better off than most of the disabled (especially developmentally disabled). It is time for the people in this country to wake up from their government empowering induced false sense of security on this!!! The government is doing a totally sucky job at protecting and helping the disabled, the widows, and the orphans. It is time for us to kick the Raw Deal, the New Deal, Title II, and Title XVI out of our thought process concerning help for the vulnerable because they aren't working. We need more people standing up for this vulnerable community. Where is the church on this one? I really don't know, but we need to be doing more. Let me end this by asking those who still think racism is more important this question: How many mothers in this country are told to abort their babies just because they aren't white?

So, allow me to lighten the mood a little. I like to end my posts on a happy note (but be warned, I have more issues I will be tackling this week). Tell me how you like this one:
A 32-year-old man was treated for a gunshot wound in his thigh in a Kentucky hospital. He had accidentally shot himself, he explained to authorities, while practicing his quick draw . . . against a snowman.

Just when you think it couldn't get any better (worse?):
A man at Dallas/Fort Worth Airport damaged a window and caused panic among passengers when he accidentally fired his hunting rifle at a security checkpoint. The gun went off while he was demonstrating to guards that it wasn't loaded.

Too good, huh?

Blessings,

Big J

Random Coolness

2006-08-07T21:07:00.000-07:00

Hey there kiddies, let's have some fun today! I got some great stuff coming down your blog pipe, right dang now! So without further ado, let's get this train wreck a rollin'!

I have here some fun facts and cool stuff. Check it out:

Have you ever heard of Max Reger? Probably not; his name isn’t even that familiar to music buffs. In fact, Reger is remembered less for his music than for his response to a scathing review of his work written by a critic named Rudolph Louis in 1906. “Dear sir,” Reger wrote in reply, “I am sitting in the smallest room of my house. I have your review before me. In a moment it will be behind me.”

Beer comes in six-packs because breweries thought that was the maximum that a woman could safely carry home. Makes some sense if you think about it, because I would bet you that the six-pack made its debut during the WWII era. I am proud to say that my wife can safely carry 2 cases of microbrew without even breaking a sweat.

Naples is the birthplace of pizza. You gotta love that town.

Johnny Carson, Michael Douglas, and Clint Eastwood were all once gas station attendants. I find that comforting, don't you?

Different bees have different “dialects.” A German bee cannot understand an Italian bee.

Bees use ultraviolet vision—a specialized vision that allows them to see which flowers have the largest amounts of nectar.

Poll results show that 40% of U.S. couples say that they first discussed marriage in a car. They didn't ask me, but I could have said that. I can still remember the conversation, where we were on the road, and where we were going to.

Incredibly cool and hilarious stuff hi-jacked from other blogs and put here for your interacting pleasure.

Extremely important life information:
1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost instantly removed. 2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables bygetting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat bysimply using the sink.
4. For high blood pressure sufferers: Simply cut yourself andbleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.
5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will preventyou from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, thenyou will be afraid to cough.
7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget all about the toothache.
8. Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of lifereally are:You only need two tools - WD-40 and Duct Tape.If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
9. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
10. Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom.

Some people are like Slinkies: they aren't really good for anything, but they still bring a huge smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs (please don't try this at home).

This is an excellent quiz. My answers can be found in the comments section of my blog. Why don't you answer them and do the same? It could be fun!

1. A person opens a fortune cookie ~ What does the fortune say that you have written?
2. You are having a long lunch at the Time Travel Diner ~ what three people from history will be joining you?
3. What has been the primary area in which you have worked and what other job would you be most interested in pursuing?
4. The last thing you had to eat was what?
5. Your favorite fragrance is what?
6. What was the coolest concert you ever went to?
7. What do you collect?
8. You have the opportunity to spend one day anywhere in the world ~ Where do you go?
9. The thing you find most interesting in nature is what?
10. Given the opportunity to order one meal {Your last?} ~ What do you have to eat?
11. The first thing that comes to mind when you see the word romance is what?
12. You are getting a tattoo {or another one}? Where are you getting it and what will it be?
13. Friday night, what is your favorite thing to do?
14. The last television program you watched was what?
15. What do you find most confusing in life?
16. What question do you wish had been on the list? And what is the answer?
17. If there were a prize for answering the questions, what would you want it to be?
18. Do you have a blog you would recommend to visit other than your own?

Back In The Saddle

2006-08-04T14:41:00.000-07:00

Hello, hello, one and all. I am back in the Land of (Bl)og. With major school and Social Security planning tasks out of the way, get ready for Jared full force baby! This full fledged member of the Hollis crew is ready to hit it. So, without further ado...

Lots has been going on. If you have been keeping a watchful eye on the counter at the top of the page (and I know you have because you are a faithful, observant reader of my blog), then you will see that I am almost done with my degree program. I will have a class or two to take, and I have a DANTES for public speaking, but those are neither here nor there when your structured program is coming to a close. I am typing so fast that I am messing up just because I am so excited! I'll try to curb my enthusiasm. Sorry, this has just be about 4 years in the making, and that is if you don't include my 2 years in community college. Funny thought. My community college mascot (Linn Benton Community College in Albany, OR) was the roadrunner. The mascot for Corban is the warrior. I suppose that makes me a road-warrior. I like that.

I have been getting further and further into benefits planning for Social Security. I have been networking via phone, meetings, and email to expand the breadth of my counsel. With something as big and messed up as Social Security, you certainly need it. No one remembers everything. I'd share it all with you, but you would be asleep by the end of the first sentence because it is so terribly boring.

I found this by chance through Gmail ads at the top of my in-box. Maybe it could be of some real help to you all. Maybe not, but I am sure that y'all would find it at least comical. Here's the link: http://www.cubedoor.com/

Well, expect greater things from me next week. This is just to get the juices flowing again.

Blessings

Big J

2006-07-28T23:24:00.000-07:00

Allow me to fix a little confusion. That posting from Salt Lake actually took place on Tuesday. I saved the quiz profile as a draft on Thursday and stacked a post on top of it after I was ready to throw some stuff down. That was weird, as I thought it would actually date it the day I posted it as opposed to the day I saved the inital stuff. Oh well.

I want to direct your attention to my newest link. My good friend Niki Nowell has started a blog on love, sex and marriage. I look forward to spending many hours there. I hope it turns out to be more discussion than debate. Knowing Niki's peaceful spirit, I would bet it will be.

I wish I had more to say tonight. I am a school work and Social Security zombie. I have more school work to do tonight before I go to be. I would not even be posting if I hadn't seen Niki's post about her new blog on her current blog. If you want a good time, go back to like my second or third post and read about farting in the air showers. I'll be funny sometime next week and get back in the groove. How could you not trust this face?

Blessings,

Big J

2006-07-25T20:50:00.000-07:00

Hi everybody (Hi Doctor Nick!). If you weren't a Simpsons fan in the early years, you won't get that. Anyways, I apologize for my lack of bloggage lately. I have been busy. I am currently in beautiful Salt Lake City, UT getting accosted by the locals for taking pictures of the uniquely Utah things (such as a bridal shop called "Latter Day Bride"). It was pretty funny actually. I disarmed them, but they just thought I was a buglar or ist casing the joint (like this Scottish/Irish/German boy could be mistaken for that! LOL). I suppose that you can't blame anyone for being too cautious in a post-9/11 world.

Anyways, Social Security, which I am here to learn about, is very broken, and horribly boring. I embellish not when I say that I was trying hard to force myself to stay awake. I drank 2 cans of Mt. Dew, and all I got to show for it was the caffeine jitters. It was my brain that was tired out. More on what I learned in a future post.

I fly out tomorrow. More on what I beheld from the air on a later post, also. Please pray for a safe flight. I don't have a great fear of flying, but I do get pretty anxious. I relax just before take off. I used to never be afraid of flying at all...before 9/11. It is enough of a psychological shock (and I recognize it as purely that) that I have a new found anxiety for air travel. Please pray for a peaceful heart, too.

Oh yeah, and remind me to tell you of the new friend I made while I was here too. I got a lot on this one! You'll be amazed.

Blessings

Big J

2006-07-20T20:14:00.000-07:00

I am back. Salt Lake City is truly a beautiful city, and it was tough to leave, even though it was insanely warm. I like it there. There are significantly less homeless people there than there is in Portland. I never got asked for change when I was there for a week in early June, but I got asked once this time. Being there 7 days total over a period of 2 months, that is pretty good. It is the second nicest large city I have ever been to, Charleston, SC occupying the number 1 spot on the list. It was very clean, and I felt very safe almost everywhere. I could think about moving there, if I have to be in a large city. The population of the area is about 1 million, which is probably something like approximately a half to a third of the Portland area. For those of my readers involved in ministry to street peoples, I don't hate the homeless. Please allow me to explain myself in another posting, if you have a desire to take issue with the above statements. My brain still hurts from all of that training.

And now as promised: As I flew out of Portland on Monday, I beheld probably the most beautiful sight of God's creation I have ever seen. When we got up to about 30,000 feet, I looked north out of my window and saw Mt. St. Helens, Mt. Rainier and Mt. Adams all together. My jaw dropped and stayed down for a solid 5 minutes as my gaze was fixed on the sight of these three behemoths standing next to each other. Now, a decent hundred miles separates Rainier and Helens, and Adams is at least a buck fifty from either, but up so high, I cupped my hands and saw them clustered together as if they were merely three small spires bursting forth from the ground. Never have I beheld such a sight. I would pay to fly out again just to see that. Words cannot do it justice. So, if you ever have a chance to fly east out of Portland International Airport, take it, and sit by the window. Bring a little cloth with some glass cleaner (my window had been smeared and snotted on thoroughly by someone's kid) and your camera. I only regret that I wasn't able to take a picture of it. I was blown away.

Not much tonight, other than that. More on other promised topics later, as I am still totally brain-dead from my SS training. If you want to talk about Impairment Related Work Expenses or the impact of receiving Workman's Comp on SSI and SSDI benefits, I have plenty to say. I get this gut feeling that y'all don't have much interest in that, so I'll let it lie for the night.

I had to remove the below quiz because it was messing with blog formatting. Sorry.

Blessings

Big J

2006-07-20T17:26:00.000-07:00

Today's post is boring, but it is about you, the people who come here...(insert sound of brakes squealing)...let me rephrase that. I am not attempting to be funny today. My main goal is not to entertain. It is to thank you all, the people who come here. This has been one of the roughest patches of time I have ever weathered. I live practically alone. I have little or no meaningful interaction with other people most days. I spend most of my time indoors doing school work, or other things related to my job. It really meant a lot to me how many of you showed up between yesterday and today to comment on my blog. And, there are those who have been there since not too long after the beginning. I owe much to the blogging community for offering me interaction and fellowship during this stretch of road. You have been the hands of Jesus to me, extended in friendship and caring. Thanks for being there. I wish I could offer you more than thanks. How about I give each and every one of you a gold star today? Yeah, that is so elementary school. But, I seriously appreciate you all. Please keep coming back. You are the bread of friendship that sustains me through this period. God bless you all.

I will keep with my tradition of posting a fun quiz. Today, I am doing a quiz I did a month ago. Check out my post for June 22 (still on the main page) to compare the results. I thought it would be interesting to see how my different state of mind (more positive than a month ago) would effect the way I answered the questions. The results are interesting, to say the least. Let me just say that this test doesn't necessarily do the best job of pegging an individual's personality, as all the definitions listed for the traits (when you click on them) seem to be negative definitions, so be warned about that.

I am always looking, so if you know of a cool site that offers fun quizzes, please let me know. As always, feel free to post results. Comments allows some html code, so always try that before typing it all out. You could also try putting the link to your results in the comments, too. If you have any doubts, click the preview button after inserting it.

Until next time, kiddies; Blessings.

Big J

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

Extraversion		66%
Stability		83%
Orderliness		60%
Accommodation		70%
Interdependence		76%
Intellectual		56%
Mystical		30%
Artistic		16%
Religious		90%
Hedonism		56%
Materialism		50%
Narcissism		43%
Adventurousness		43%
Work ethic		43%
Self absorbed		70%
Conflict seeking		16%
Need to dominate		23%

Romantic		70%
Avoidant		10%
Anti-authority		43%
Wealth		16%
Dependency		50%
Change averse		23%
Cautiousness		50%
Individuality		16%
Sexuality		76%
Peter pan complex		50%
Physical security		83%
Physical Fitness		24%
Histrionic		43%
Paranoia		10%
Vanity		16%
Hypersensitivity		50%
Female cliche		50%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

Stability results were high which suggests you are very relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic.

Orderliness results were moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly organized, reliable, neat, and hard working at the expense of flexibility, efficiency, spontaneity, and fun.

Extraversion results were moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity.

trait snapshot:
clean, likes large parties, outgoing, makes friends easily, optimistic, positive, social, high self control, traditional, assertive, rarely irritated, self revealing, open, finisher, high self concept, controlling, rarely worries, tough, likes to stand out, does not like to be alone, semi neat freak, fearless, dominant, trusting, organized, resolute, strong, practical, craves attention, adventurous, hard working, respects authority, brutally honest, realist, altruistic

2006-07-19T20:22:00.000-07:00

Please welcome Susan to Big J's blog. She is a talented (and published, might I add) author, as well as a dedicated Christian and devoted wife and mother of 3. She is attempting to attract the interest of prospective publishers by progressively posting chapters (in sequence) of her newest literary endeavor every Friday on her blog. Go visit and give her a shout out. She does some philosophical/theological stuff here and there too. She keeps it shallow enough for people to engage in, but it is still thinkin' stuff.

A cool fact: Red herrings were very pungent fishes used for training hunting dogs to follow a scent. Knowing this, poachers would often use the herrings to confuse other hunters’ hounds into following a false trail. The poachers would then be free to go after their prey, unchallenged. I always thought it had something to do with communism and the Soviets. Maybe it was the bad guy named Red Herring on the short lived and low quality series "A Pup Named Scooby-Doo" back in the late 80's, early 90's that made me think that. I dunno.

A depressing fact: 24 hours from now you'll have forgotten 80% of everything you learned today. This makes me feel stupid to even think about. Oh well, by the law of averages, I'll have completely forgotten it tomorrow.

I feel like I got the short end of the stick on many things as far as being a child of the late 20th century (missing out on America's golden years, seeing the disappearance of free camping, etc), but where I know I totally feel skunked is good boxing. Sure, we had Mike Tyson in the 80's and like the first year of the 90's, but he never had the constant stream of challengers or rivals that were so prevalent previous to that time in heavy-weight boxing. Plus, everything went to Pay-per-View. All the big fights, like the ones Ali was in, were on ABC's Wide World of Sports. Anyone with a TV could watch them. I feel like I get a little bit of that back, though, when I watch ESPN's reality series "The Contender." I watched the two back episodes that I had previously missed last night. That was awesome fighting. It got my heart pounding hard! And these guys don't pussyfoot around, either, like most boxing you see (including that on Pay-per-View). They go right at it all three minutes, all five rounds. The reason is that these guys don't get anything if they don't win and make it to be the last fighter standing (out of a group of 16). They have compelling stories, too, so you really feel for all of them. They want to fight to make a better life for their families. You can't help but like them. No matter who loses, you feel bad for them. I like that kind of drama in a reality series. But, truth be told, I'm really just there for the fighting. These guys are good and worth tuning in to.

So here's my weird quiz of the day. It is a world-view quiz. A little interesting, though I don't know how useful. Give it a shot and let me know what you think.

Blessings

Big J

You scored as Fundamentalist. Fundamentalism represents a movement in opposition to Modernism, stressing the highest importance on foundational religious tradition. Science has brought on corruption of society. God is real and is watching. Scripture leaves little room for interpretation; man is God?s creation. About a quarter of the population in the U.S. is classified as Fundamentalist.

Fundamentalist

88%

Cultural Creative

75%

Romanticist

75%

Existentialist

25%

Idealist

25%

Postmodernist

25%

Materialist

19%

Modernist

13%

What is Your World View?
created with QuizFarm.com

2006-07-18T17:30:00.000-07:00

As you can see, I added a couple of new links. Justin is a pastor in Canada and though I don't agree with some of the things he says, he has an excellent perspective on life and the Christian faith. Then, there is "The Bestest Blog of All Time" which is a blog about blogs that will link to your blog reciprocally. It is a shameless attempt at self-promotion where everyone wins. Also, to give myself a sense of time and progression, I have added a count down to important events in my life. I have on for my trip to Salt Lake City next week, and I have one for the day that I finish my BS in Psychology-Family Studies through Corban. Can you guess which one I am more excited about?

Funny thing happened to me today. I was over at another building, and I had latex gloves on. I was bringing back some uniforms that people are trying on for sizing (so they are pretty grody since everyone has had them on their bods). I had to make an "unscheduled stop" to take a leak. It was a long trek back to my building (5 minutes plus), and there was no way to decrease that margin of time because it would only increase my urge if I cantered or ran back. Besides, it's a nice day out there and I wanted to enjoy the stroll. So I go over into the restroom and unzip my fly on my brand new pair of khaki shorts. It was tough to get it undone, and I am thinking, "Dang, it wasn't that hard last time." Then I go to move my hands so I can position my shorts and my hand snaps back at my crotch!! I look down, and my latex glove is caught in my fly. I struggle with the glove and my fly, but it isn't budging. I start to think, "Dude, there is no way this can look good if you leave your hand in or take it out. That glove will still be hanging there." My urgency to pee was not decreasing, so I creatively get everything situated so I can perform my natural function, and do so. I keep thinking about how to get out of it, but am coming up dry. I finish up and evaluate the situation. After a little creative positioning and tugging, I finally get the glove to come loose. I walk back to my building basking in the sunshine, and hoping that no one asks me why the tip of the right index finger of my latex glove is missing :*

Here is the quiz of the day. Scientifically speaking, a monkey picking answers on a test at random will be right 25% of the time. Are you smarter than a stupid monkey? Click on this link and go show that primate who's boss!

I beat the monkey by 23 points.
Monkey Challenge Quiz

Blessings

Big J

2006-07-17T16:31:00.000-07:00

So I promised I was going somewhere with all of this alcohol stuff. Hopefully those of you who are 100% N/A haven't abandoned me. I would hope that we can all be mature and, in the words of John Wecks, be "Free to disagree, agreeably." We are warned to not be of much wine, an expression meaning "don't be a drunkard" not "don't ever drink alcohol." Yet, I don't judge anyone who has a conviction against drinking. I have known too many families effected by alcoholic members that could not touch or think good of the stuff. I just beg that you wouldn't judge me, as the Scriptures command us to abstain from doing so.

Honestly, I think I am beginning to regret posting on this because my hit count has plummetted since I started. But, I suppose I am going to be who I am, and I will continue to press on toward the upward call in Christ Jesus. Now, without further ado, I will get down to business.

The difficulty is that, given my family history, I have traditionally enjoyed alcohol. I still do. I decided to give it up for Lent this year. It was a great excercise in giving up something sacrificially to focus on atonement and the suffering of Jesus. But, since then, I have felt the call to continue to stay away from it, and yet a call to return to enjoying the fruits of the earth that the Lord has blessed that we might be merry. Even as I type this, I have felt a conflicting message in my heart. This is something that I have prayed a lot about and still really struggle with. I wish the picture was all neat and tidy, but it isn't. I wish I could truly show you the stir of internal conflict all of this has caused in my heart and soul. I want to be an obedient servant to the Lord, and I want to do what is good and right. Hard to know what that is sometimes.

So, now you see what I have been digging at lately. I truly hope that I haven't lost any friends over this. It could just be that it is vaction season, and I suppose that I will hope that it is the case until I begin to hear from you all again. Please post a comment and let me know that you are still around and praying for me on this.

Here is the latest quiz, for those out there that enjoy this feature.

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	7.5
Mind:	6.8
Body:	6.1
Spirit:	9.2
Friends/Family:	4.7
Love:	9.1
Finance:	8.8
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

Blessings,

Big J

2006-07-14T12:42:00.000-07:00

So call me a liar...again. I just really feel the need to lighten the conversation with a pause between posts. It is a huge deal for me to open up like this. I am saying controversial things, and I don't know if you all don't agree with me so you aren't posting comments, or if you don't connect with it, or if you are just busy, but it hasn't been easy for me and I am beginning to question a little whether or not I should have opened up on this. I'll finish my postings on it, but I am beginning to experience a little doubt.

If you don't know the funniest web toon site on the Internet, allow me to introduce you to the Homestar Runner. Here is the link to "First Time Here" part of the site http://www.homestarrunner.com/firsttime.html, and the latest installment of Strong Bad email, which is a little off the wall humor mixed in with a little middle school humor http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail153.html. Email jokes abound! And some Apple computer humor thrown in too. I get a kick out of it. I am into smiling, and this helps reinforce and support that habit. Oh! And click the word "JERK" once the toon is done for a funny easter egg (figurative sense, hence why "easter" is lower case).

That's all for today. If you drop by, please feel free to give me a shout out in my comments section. It'd be good to hear from you on the current topic. Do believe me, I am going somewhere with it.

Blessings

Big J

2006-07-13T17:26:00.000-07:00

Alcohol today, I suppose. I probably owe it to you after renegging yesterday. I know I'm a bum, you don't have to tell me.

If it isn't already obvious, I have a fancy or penchant for a good beer. I have made many in my day. Bochs (or bocks), porters, hefeweizen (that's said "hef-a-vie-zen" for those of you unlearned of beers), ales, lagers, etc: I have done them all. And it is an amazing process. I'll spare the long lecture about how beer is made, but I must say that God made such amazing little critters in yeast. Those bad boys are awesome. It is just incredible all the different things yeast can do, and what they can convert into what.

I grew up being taught the philosophy that beer is not something you chug for a high. Just like an excellent main course of a meal, or an artistically made cake for dessert, beer is something that is crafted and to be appreciated for its flavor and complexity. When all of the kids my age were off getting drunk and having sex at these rural party sites, I was at home with my folks enjoying the warm summer evening, sitting on the porch, enjoying talking about our dreams for the future, and sipping beer with them. I don't mean to make this a "lesser of two evils thing" because that isn't what it is. The contrast is "a good thing enjoyed as it should be" and "a good thing abused to feed the lust of the flesh" just as sex was at those parties. My parents taught me what was good and right when it came to appreciating things like food, video games, and beer. Always in moderation. To this day, I still rarely play video games for extended periods of time. That is why I bought the Nintendo DS and will buy the Nintendo Wii when it comes out. With the PS2, PSP, or XBox360, most games are ones that you must spend hours on to enjoy. I don't dig that. Allow me to hop off the rabbit trail back onto the main path: I was taught well good and right how to respect good things. Beer, in a way, was also something that brought our family together, save my little brother (who didn't really like it, but, ironically later became an alcoholic (for the high not the flavor) and has done drugs for the last 8 or 9 years on and off). My mom never drank beer before dad started making it. Once she tasted homebrew, she loved it. She became interested in our world. We started spending time together as a family, sitting around and enjoying the brew, and talking about it, and other things. It was truly a blessing at a really rough juncture for my family, as my older brother ran away from home at the age of 15. It helped us find common ground and hold the peace during some really, really tough times. In any other context this would sound perverse, but my family needed beer. We really needed that common bond to hold us together. I shudder to think how things would have turned out if we had not had something to build our understanding and relationships around. In many ways, it saved us as a unit during that period. Put that in your pipe and smoke it a while, eh?

More next time, as our hero explores the reason behind these postings and what he is really digging at.

So, I am grand ol' Abe Lincoln (another rad test result), what famous leader are you? Take the quiz and post your response and the html feed in my comments area. I'd like to know.

Blessings

Big J

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

2006-07-13T00:30:00.000-07:00

Sorry kids, no alcohol stuff today. I'm a liar, go ahead and say it. I am posting some time around 1AM because I am up, and something came to me. If you haven't checked back with me since before 6PM PDT yesterday, then read my last post too. Then you'll know why I'm apologizing.

Depression does bad things to a man. One of which is that it becomes an impediment to serious prayer and Scripture reading. Not that it prevents it, for some reason, it just seems to make it harder to crack the pages of my favorite book or spend time talking to my favorite Person (not human, person, and, yes, there is a difference). I was reading in Matthew the other day. I came across the darkest pages of Scripture: Matthew 27. It describes the gruesome situation of the crucifixion. I never feel as guilty as I should when I read it. You know, to know that your sin did that. I think that might be an effect of the depression too (I have been extremely apathetic lately). That said, it still saddened me greatly to read those pages. Jesus loved me this much, and He trusted in the Father's plan completely. I was reading in the Bible I used in my Gospels class when I was attending Multnomah Bible College. I had one of the few professors I truly respected for that class: Tom Hauff. We are much like each other, and he genuinely cares about his students and shows it by his involvement in their lives. Okay, I'm rambling. Back to the point. I got to verse 60, where the action really ends. It's over. Jesus has been laid in the virgin tomb, and everyone has gone home dismayed. I had noted Isaiah 53:9 by it. So I flipped back. It read:
His grave was assigned with wicked men,
Yet He was with a rich man in His death,
Becase He had done no violence,
Nor was there any decit in His mouth.
Well, that's good I thought, but being a true student of Scripture, I know that a verse is nothing without its context. So, I thought I'd finish out the chapter and go back to read the beginning after. What I found next sufficed well, and provided a "spin" on the situation that I hadn't considered.
10. But the Lord was pleased to crush Him, putting Him to grief;
If He would render Himself as a guilt offering
He will see His offsprinng
He will prolong His days,
And the good pleasure of the Lord will prosper in His hand.
11. As a result of the anguish of His soul,
He will see it and be satisfied;
By His knowledge the Righteous One,
My Servant, will justify the many,
As He will bear their iniquities.
12. Therefore, I will allot Him a portion with the great,
And He will divide the booty with the strong;
Because He poured out Himself to death,
And was numbered with the transgressors;
Yet He Himself bore the sin of many,
And interceded for the transgressors.

Brothers, Sisters, Friends: that is me and that is you. Why did He set His face like a flint toward Jerusalem? Why did He boldly enter and stay there in spite of the knowledge that He would be betrayed and die a gruesome death? Why did He refuse the wine doped with gall? For this. I am sure that Jesus must have had these Scriptures in His mind to comfort Him. They certainly comfort me in my contemplation of the cross. But why am I saying this and pointing it out, rather than just personally contemplating it like I do whenever I find this stuff in Scripture? Because it reminded me that sometimes we go through periods of deep, desperate darkness, but not without hope. There is a reason for our suffering. James also reminds us of this in the first chapter of his epistle, verses 2 and 3. Yet, not just that, but there is light in the darkest of times. There is hope for tomorrow. What happened on the cross looked horrible. What it accomplished was wonderful. Remember when you struggle and go through rough times. There is light to be seen if you look for it, because I could have ignored that reference and kept right on reading in Matthew 27. It takes effort to see, but it is there to be found. Take heed and do not forget.

Well, time for some fun. Have a ball with this. I am a total freakin' stud because I Aragorn. Who are you?

Aragorn

If I were a character in The Lord of the Rings, I would be Aragorn, Man of the West, leader of the Rangers who guard the hobbits.

In the movie, I am played by Viggo Mortensen.

Who would you be?
Zovakware Lord of the Rings Test with Perseus Web Survey Software

PS They are filthy stinking liar pantses, I did too post this at 1AM, no matter what the time at the bottom says.

2006-07-12T15:49:00.000-07:00

Wow, I am actually getting a little blog R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Thanks all who are visiting and mentioning me on their blogs. I am enjoying it.

I was watching a show on the History Channel today called Weird US. They are kind of like the MythBusters of strange history of the United States. They actually look a lot like the MythBusters. Anyway, in the spirit of Niki's compliment (that I am the king of little known and useless trivia) Aaron Burr, shamed and villified after killing Alexander Hamilton, a founding father, in a duel, abandoned his post as the third vice-president of the US under Thomas Jefferson, and ran off to that American Southwest. He attempted to form a government, an army, and install himself as king of the United States of Southwestern America. There was an actual battle between his mustered forces and the US army, which he lost. He was tried for treason, but was able to find sympathy with the judge and got off. As a psychology student, I wish I could have sat down with him to see what made him tick. What a nut.

Well, today I promised a post about alcohol, and I suppose that I should deliver. So allow me to try.

I grew up in a home where alcohol was respected and not abused. My parents were the church-going type, and they believe in God and His Holy Scriptures. I was raised to view alcohol as a blessing. It was something good that God has given us to enjoy in moderation, just like food, or any other good thing.

Dad and I have always been polar opposites, and still are in many ways, though we have similar basic traits, such as being very laid back, enjoying the slow times and the countryside, and loving life for the simple things. He was always the sportsman. Fishing, hunting, and country music were his pleasures. I went along and did them because I was the only kid who was stable, well-behaved, and willing to get up early enough to do it with him. I liked books, martial arts, video games, and hard rock. I wanted a good read and a quiet place to sit. I wanted to play the newest RPG for my Super Nintendo and listen to Van Halen, Metallica or the Red Hot Chili Peppers. I really didn't enjoy doing the things dad wanted to do. I liked camping and all that, but getting up at 3AM to sit in a tree stand for three and a half hours and freeze your butt off just to never get a shot at an elk (like I could have bent my fingers around the nocked arrow anyway, they were so frozen stiff) was not my idea of a great time.

So when dad started brewing beer when I was 13, it was a natural fit for us both. Dad got into a hobby he loved, and I loved science, so this was great. He was finally talking my language. This became part of a long bond that we shared throughout my childhood. We brewed together often. Since there is always one more improvement that can always be made to your system, we were often working on those projects together. We talked mash-tons, mash temps (as in temperatures), and finding a better way of sparging (in effect building the better rat trap). When I was 15, I got a job at my dad's work cleaning the place. He was a truck driver, and I cleaned the terminal every Friday. When he got off, we would drive 20 miles out to the homebrew supply shop and shoot the breeze with the owner for a good hour to 90 minutes. Then, we would drive to his friend Keith's (also a homebrewer) and spend a couple hours there drinking beer, talking, and just having a good time. For once in my life, I felt like I had a decent relationship with my dad. That meant something because my brothers, Jeremiah and Jason, both loved to fish and do some hunting, so he was closer to them for most of my growing up years. I always seemed like there was this barrier with Dad that I couldn't break through, and it really felt like I finally had. We were finally talking and spending time together. We were planning to do stuff with eachother. I found some understanding of him and he found a little of me. They say alcohol rips families apart. That isn't true. People who refuse to control themselves around things, be it alcohol, drugs, credit cards, food, you name it, rip families apart, and don't tell me it is a disease. Lifting your hand to your mouth isn't a disease. Alcohol effects some people differntly than others, I don't dispute that, but living a good life is about self control. Beer brought my dad and I close.

That's all for tonight. I will continue this in my next post. For now, what kind of Kettle Chip are you? Here's my profile, and I think it is just about right on.

I am Sweet on Top, Smoke in the Curves

So sweet and sultry, I'm a dusky summer evening. I like to savor the slow pleasures in life. I'm willing to wait for a good thing and I know how to bring out the best in others. I'm a good neighbor, but I'm also sometimes the mysterious stranger. I know how to relax and take it easy. When my friends just want to have an easy good time, they call me.

PS Dustin is a smelly, lying doo-doo head. For reference, see Niki's Awesome Blog comment section for yesterday's post.

2006-07-11T18:16:00.000-07:00

As you can see, I have added another couple of blog friends to my links. Niki I met through a blog through a blog through a blog, and Soph I met through a blog through a blog. Niki and her husband Benny have a ministry to street kids in Denver, CO. They are awesome people living life with sweet abandon for the Lord. Check out her blog and the sites connected with their ministry, Dry Bones Denver. I have really come to value her, as a friend of hers put it, as a friend in 1s and 0s. She recently tackled the tricky topic of sex in a completely Christian context, and it was really encouraging to read. It seems that there might actually be a story by MSNBC about it sometime in the near future. We are waiting expectantly.

Soph is a dear, sweet spirit. She is a member of the LDS church who is working with her husband through the healing process of a pornography addiction. Her posts are honest, brave, vulnerable, open, and revealing. Stop by, give her a shout out of support and maybe see if you can't learn something from her experience.

I am still waiting for Chelf to start her blog. She is very creative, and it will be an interesting read when she gets around to it.

I suppose I might start a subject posting soon dealing with alcohol. That is all I will say about that right now.

Blessings

Big J

2006-07-11T17:22:00.000-07:00

I took another one of those Myers-Briggs type personality tests. I get the feeling sometimes that I am pretty "raw" as in what you see is what you get. The conventions of secrecy or refinement don't seem to have much use in the current context of my life. I am a very open person. That was just a revelation that struck me when I looked at the results of this quiz. I don't know if I like that or not. I often wonder if I should be more concerned with liking who I am or if I should just be as I am. I don't know. I guess it is hard to have too much of a reference point when you spend so much time alone. I suppose I'll think about doing some digging in this area after I am rested from my labors (school and Social Security field assignments). At any rate, here are the results.

Jung Explorer Test
Actualized type: ESFJ
(who you are)

ESFJ - "Seller". Most sociable of all types. Nurturer of harmony. Outstanding host or hostesses. 12.3% of total population.

Preferred type: ESFJ
(who you prefer to be)

ESFJ - "Seller". Most sociable of all types. Nurturer of harmony. Outstanding host or hostesses. 12.3% of total population.

Attraction type: ESFJ

(who you are attracted to)

ESFJ - "Seller". Most sociable of all types. Nurturer of harmony. Outstanding host or hostesses. 12.3% of total population.

Take Jung Explorer Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

As you can see, the label they gave me was ESFJ as opposed to ESTJ the last time. It just depends on how the questions are asked, what words they use, how I am feeling, if I have gas, etc for how I get rated between thinking and feeling. As you can see, my last test put me at a ratio of about fifty-fifty: Thinking (T) 51.35% Feeling (F) 48.65%. So there it is. That's all for tonight. I will be doing some editing and adding new links. And you should visit all of my links. If you promise that you will, I'll quit stealing all of the bricks from your house, one-by-one.

Blessings

Big J

PS Okay, so this was just too fun and I had to throw it in.

Freudian Inventory Results

Oral (56%) you appear to have a good balance of independence and interdependence knowing when to accept help and when to do things on your own.
Anal (56%) you appear to have a good balance of self control and spontaneity, order and chaos, variety and selectivity.
Phallic (40%) you appear to have a good balance of sexual awareness and sexual composure.
Latency (43%) you appear to have a good balance of abstract knowledge seeking and practicality, dealing with real world responsibilities while still cultivating your abstract and creative faculties and interests.
Genital (53%) you appear to be somewhere between a progressive/openminded and regressive/closeminded outlook on life.

Freuds theorized that there are 5 stages of psychological development. At the oral stage the main issue is dependency, at the anal stage the main issue is self control, at the phallic stage the main issue is sexual identity, at the latency stage it's skill development, and at the genital stage its creativity and productivity.

Freud theorized that psychological problems are related to problems during one or more of these stages. For example, being too cared for or too neglected causes someone to be orally fixated, too much or too little control causes someone to be anally fixated, insufficient parental role modeling causes phallic fixation.

An orally fixated person is either irrationally dependent (expects what they want to just appear) or irrationally independent (always refuses help).

An anally fixated person is either irrationally self controlled and servile to authority or has no self control and is compulsively defiant of authority.

A phallicly fixated person is either a sexual compulsive (sexually innappropriate/promiscuous) or sexually repressed.

Freud did not classify any latent fixation but I think it is as plausible as those at the other stages. I speculate that people that like to learn and acquire knowledge without any purpose or people that are compulsively non curious represent both dysfunctional ends of the latency spectrum.

The genital stage is the final Freudian developmental stage and according to Freud people don't all succeed at this. Freud believed the ideal for human happiness is to be happy in love and work, problems in one or the other cause unhappiness.

Like any personality system, Freud's developmental levels are just a theory, so, be speculative about your results.

Take Free Freudian Inventory Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

2006-07-10T17:20:00.000-07:00

OK, so it is later. There you are and here I am...yup...umhmm. All the excitement. I can't hardly stand it. So here I am alone at work, but it seems different today. I had this strange feeling of rebirth as I walked out to my car. I was not lugging my 15 lb binder of Social Security stuff along with me. I was just carrying my lunch. It felt good, like a huge burden lifted. Sure, I will have to go back and correct, but I will cross that bridge when I get there. For now, it is nice to have a break. It makes me look forward to the end of school. It makes me tired to think about how far off that is, and the other 2 field assignments I have to finish. They should be much, much easier than the first one, though. I am on the home stretch in several ways. It is an all out sprint to finish most of this up by September 7, the opening day of the NFL season. I won't be home to watch that game, but I will probably tape it so I can watch it the next morning before I go to work. I am hoping to be freed up to just enjoy Sundays without having to concern myself with homework. We'll see how it all goes. Now, you might think that the NFL is the most important thing in my life, but you are wrong. Football, both college and professional, is the one leisure I really have that doesn't take anything from me. I don't have to work my brain or my body really hard to enjoy a good game. That is what I like about football.

That, and it isn't boring like soccer. Did anyone else see the World Cup final?! The first 20 minutes were riveting, and the next 90 were horribly boring! That is until Zizou head-butted an Italian player right in the chest for something he said. He promptly was awarded a red card and ejected. What a high note to end such an illustrious career on. He got ejected and his replacement missed the penalty kick in the PK round to determine the winner of the game. That was the one that put the nail in the coffin for France. Italy should have lost. They looked tired. They were worn and not playing agressively for pretty much the last half of that game. If there was the ability to cause the French to lose, Zinedine Zidane did it by his ejection. Then, and I can't freakin' believe this, they gave him the Golden Ball award (read "MVP") of the World Cup! I like what Jim Rome said today about that on his TV show, "How very soccer of them (FIFA)." I don't like Jim most of the time because he is so negative and on people's cases, but that hit the nail on the head. I laughed hard at that. Too funny. I also liked the back page of "Sports News Daily" line, "Way to go butt-head!" This is gold. I am laughing so hard! Ouch, my ribs, it's killing my ribs!

Which brings me to my next point: soccer hasn't caught on in the US because they try too hard to be like European soccer. I have no interest in rooting for FC Salt Lake. Seriously, that is dumb. Manchester United may be just fine for England, but DC United hasn't given anyone any desire to go watch one of their games. Have a real name. No, the US soccer league wants to castrate that from their ranks. They took the most successful franchise, the San Jose Earthquakes (not a great name, but not a bad name either), and moved it right after they won the national championship. They shipped the club out to Houston and renamed them the "1855s"! What is up with that?! Imagine the Cleveland Browns winning the SuperBowl and then the NFL uprooting them to another market right away. That would be suicide. Until they start "doing" soccer the American way, Americans are going to ignore it. I just wonder if they get that. But, then again, we do have soccer done the American way. It is called football.

I suppose I should go take a break and have dinner. Peace be with you all.

Big J

2006-07-10T13:13:00.000-07:00

Short post before I run off to work. I finally got my Social Security stuff turned in over the weekend...but, like a freakin' boomerang, it will come back. I will have to do corrections to it when they return it to me. But, the major part is over, so I am happy to hit that milestone. Here is a Myers-Briggs personality type test that I took. I got the exact same results I did a year and a half ago. I suppose consistency is good. More later.

Big J

ESTJ Extroverted (E) 68.57% Introverted (I) 31.43%
Sensing (S) 57.14% Intuitive (N) 42.86%
Thinking (T) 51.35% Feeling (F) 48.65%
Judging (J) 54.84% Perceiving (P) 45.16% - "Administrator". Much in touch with the external environment. Very responsible. Pillar of strength. 8.7% of total population.

Free Jung Word Test (similar to Myers-Briggs)
personality tests by similarminds.com

2006-07-07T20:18:00.000-07:00

Well, still not much today. I met a gal who works here at my job named Melissa. She is the mother of 12 kids!!! I was shocked. She is one tough and capable woman. Her husband just had a falling out with his business partner, and the party will not release their financial assets to them, so she had to come to work. Please pray for them. She wants to be at home with her children. They had homeschooled up to this point, but with her working 12-hour grave shifts, that is no longer possible. Her husband is working out of their garage trying to start up a new business. They are living off of a home-equity loan too. She seems like a really wise and fantastic Christian gal. I look forward to getting to talk to her more.

Well, I have to get back to Social Security stuff. Here is a quiz I took on Pattern Recognition intelligence. It was fun, but challenging. Give it a try and see how you do.

Blessings

Sir Francis Galton, the cousin of Charles Darwin, first popularized the notion of measurable intelligence in the late 1800s. Charles Spearman later discovered that all mental abilities tend to correlate together when statistically analyzed. He called this G. Modern researchers tend to agree that there are two kinds of intelligence, crystallized intelligence (learned knowledge) and fluid intelligence (abstract processing ability). Most non-verbal intelligence tests measure the latter. Some research suggests that fluid intelligence may correlate best to G.

Congratulations, you obtained a very high score. I am researching intelligence and personality so I would greatly appreciate if you would use the comment form below to answer the following questions.

What was your childhood IQ measured at? SAT score? GRE score?
What is your career or what career do you plan on pursuing?
How has your intelligence affected your life?
Do you think intelligence correlates negatively with physical attractiveness?
Did you have any problems with any of the questions on this test, was it challenging, easy?

Include your email if you are open to possibly getting some follow up questions from me (your email will be kept private). If you would rather think about the questions and answer later, submit your answers via the contact link.

Your overall percentile is 93% which means you scored higher than 93% of the people who have taken this test. The internet population tends to be more intelligent so your percentile might be higher if the test taking sample was perfectly random. Keep in mind, taking this test more than once will render your percentile score inaccurate because the percentile score assumes these questions were fresh to the test taker.

The point of this test is to challenge you and show you how you compare to other test takers on a set of novel questions. Consequently, I need to keep the answers secret to protect the integrity of the test.

And, yes, I did fill in the comment box to answer those questions. I can take a compliment every now and again. Here's the link for the test.

http://similarminds.com/int.html

2006-07-06T21:23:00.000-07:00

I have been griping a lot lately about how tough my life is. Well, it is all true, but tonight I have something else burdening my heart. Rather, someone else. Jen and I (but mostly Jen) watch over and interact with these 2 little girls in our apartment complex. Katelyn, who is turning 12 soon, and her sister, Patience, who is 4. Patience is autistic and non-verbal. They have a verbally abusive brother who is about Katelyn's age, and their father is a non-existent authority presence in their life. I believe he is mentally handicapped. Their mother walked out on them and hasn't been back. They are not very well taken care of, and Patience runs everyone's life because their father just gives her whatever she wants so that she won't throw a fit. Katelyn is truly a jewel who needs some healthy boundaries established and a little more care to blossom. She can't really read or write. We have had to "kick" them out of our apartment on more than a few occasions because Patience throws a fit, will hit, slap or scratch Jen, or otherwise do the same to her sister or destroy something. Unfortunately, Katelyn and Patience are a package deal because Katelyn has had the role of parent to Patience thrust upon her by their father. Where Katelyn goes, Patience goes too. Jen has had some great opportunities to spend time with Katelyn alone, but not extremely frequently. They are headed off tomorrow to spend the rest of the summer at their grandparent's farm in Wyoming. We hope that will provide more structure for them both, but we just don't know. Please pray for them both, that God would work through us to help them develop into productive and godly people. I don't think they know Christ as their savior, though they say they go to church sometimes. We have been working on that too.

It will be good to have the summer off from them. It sometimes feels like we already have children. This will give us an opportunity to reevaluate the situation, which we sorely need. Jen is about at her wits end with Patience because she just won't yield, and if there be someone on this earth that can get any kid to behave, it be Jen. Please pray that we will find patience with Patience and have wisdom to deal with her.

On a side note, the International Sissy Competition, also known as the World Cup, wraps up this weekend with a third place match between Germany (go homeland!!!) and Portugal and a finals match between France and Italy. I have been surprised at the moxy France's geezer squad has shown this year. They have worked really hard to get to where they are this year, so it is a good thing that the World Cup is in Germany this year because hard work is illegal in France ;p

Blessings to awlyall.

2006-07-05T21:00:00.000-07:00

For some odd reason, I have a great aversion to doing anything important or significant today. Stress has piled on, and I think I am just starting to crack. I'm losing it, and need desperately to get it back. I am barely surviving. I need to see and talk to people. I think I got reminded of that over the 4th of July weekend, as my wife and I went to see my folks on Saturday and Sunday, and then we spent a good amount of time together yesterday. My brain is telling me that there isn't enough social interaction going on, and that I need to fix that. I gotta hang in there for just a few more weeks until I can get this Social Security training in there, and until I can finish up my current class. The next one is supposed to be a piece of cake. Well...here's to hoping I can make it to the next stage. It won't be easy, but I will give it my all. Wish me luck. I'll be back for more punishment, er, I mean, to write more soon.

Big J

2006-07-03T17:15:00.000-07:00

I had a great weekend. I celebrated the 4th with my parents. There is something precious about being with the people you grew up with, even if you aren't totally like them anymore. It makes me feel sorrow for my wife, and yet I hope. She lost her mom at age 17 to Lou Gherig's disease and her sister 2 years ago to a drunk driver. She has been all but estranged from her father because he has been abusive and alcoholic. He called on Friday. We rejoiced because he told Jen that he gave up drinking a couple of months ago, and he has been clean since. We are excited because he has been different since then. Jen has noticed it on the occasions that he has called, but we were hesitant to hope. Still are a little. But we are looking forward to going down to visit him now, and hope to have the chance to eventually share the gospel with him sober. We are praying about it. We would hope that you who read this would be too. We have a reason to hope for the first time, and we are excited by the potential.

I hope you will all share in my mirth, as I have received an invitation from the National Scholar Honors Society to apply for membership. Throughout my BS program, I have been able to carry a 3.845 GPA, with just a few classes left to go. It is thanks much to my wife, who has given me the support I need to do it, and because she has been the guinea pig. I am in the same program she is in, and I came in 3 months behind. She had all of the instructors I have had, and I have been able to see what they weight their grades on. She has carried a GPA over 3.6, and I think it would be a mirror situation had I been through the program before her, only I would probably have slightly lower than a 3.6 GPA and she would probably be carrying higher than a 3.845 GPA. She is a perfectionist, and I am a bit of a slacker. You wouldn't know it by my GPA, though, and I am riding that one all the way to the bank.

I might actually find interest in watching the World Cup finals tomorrow, even though it is played by nancy boys. My people (the Germans) are facing off against my wife's people (the Italians). I actually get the day off work, so we can watch it and act like the Euro nuts who care about the sport too much. We can get wasted on bad tasting beer and get in a fight over who was more "Third Reich." Sad truth, it is very popular among soccer hooligans to be racist and anti-Semitic. I just don't understand where these wackos get the idea that they have the moral high-ground over the US. Especially with all the sex trafficking of underage girls that goes on in Europe, especially Germany. I am happy to say my ancestors left the home country like 100+ years ago. I'm just rambling now. I'll quit.

As for the wacky holiday celebration: yesterday was "I Forgot Day." Apparently it really was. They forgot to update the wacky holiday site I usually get my stuff from. Kinda funny, huh? This week is Natural Unassisted Homebirth Week. Yes, the thought of that scares me too. They even had midwives in ancient Egypt (Exodus 2), maybe we should also. The other website I get this stuff from says that today is Air-Conditioning Appreciation Day. Here in Vancouver, WA, it is pretty sweltering today, so I am in the holiday spirit. It is nice to work indoors.

How about a weird fortune? Uncle Jared hasn't handed one of those out in a while. Here is today's: Don't ask, don't say. Everything lies in silence. This is one weird fortune, alright. I don't think I want to know what it is talking about.

Blessings to ya, for now...
Big J

Your Linguistic Profile:

55% General American English

25% Yankee

10% Upper Midwestern

5% Midwestern

0% Dixie

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

2006-06-30T17:55:00.000-07:00

Okay, I know I still haven't been here much, but things have been totally crazy. My life has been quite out of control. I am finishing up several projects for school and my Social Security training, as well as some extra-cirricular activities for my job. I haven't gone completely insane, but I have gone, and I am out looking for myself. Here is a little something to entertain yourself with until I figure out where I went and go to retrieve me.

PS I like my soap opera alias and my punk rock band name.

Jared Jaymz King's Aliases

Your movie star name: Twinkies Robert

Your fashion designer name is Jared Nurnberg

Your socialite name is Jar Head Miami

Your fly girl / guy name is J Kin

Your detective name is Dog Jefferson

Your barfly name is Potato Chips Beer

Your soap opera name is Jaymz Skelton

Your rock star name is M&Ms Cheetah

Your Star Wars name is Jarnic Kinchi

Your punk rock band name is The Pleasant Zip Tie

The Amazing Meganame Generator

I had to toss this one in there too.

You Are a Losing Lottery Ticket!

Full of hope and promise.
But in the end, a cheap letdown.

What Crappy Christmas Gift Are You?

I keep adding these cool things to this post. I will just list the fun ones below. It has been a good way to blow off a little steam.

Your Theme Song is Beautiful Day by U2

"Sky falls, you feel like
It's a beautiful day
Don't let it get away"

You see the beauty in life, especially in ordinary everyday moments.
And if you're feeling down, even that seems a little beautiful too.

What's Your Theme Song?

Your Inner European is Irish!

Sprited and boisterous!
You drink everyone under the table.

Who's Your Inner European?

I am Irish!

You Are Guinness

You know beer well, and you'll only drink the best beers in the world.
Watered down beers disgust you, as do the people who drink them.
When you drink, you tend to become a bit of a know it all - especially about subjects you don't know well.
But your friends tolerate your drunken ways, because you introduce them to the best beers around.

What's Your Beer Personality?

Drink Guiness on tap. It is delicious.

Your Life Path Number is 5

Your purpose in life is to life freely and collect experiences.

You love life - new adventures, new people, new ideas.
You are very curious, and you crave novelty in all forms.
You tend to make friends easily, and you enjoy the company of all types of people.

In love, you are fun and even a bit intoxicating. But you won't stick around for long.

You are impulsive and spontaneous - which sometimes leads you to do things you regret.
Sometimes you can be overindulgent with food, sex, or drugs.
You have many talents, so many that you are often scattered and unfocused.

What Is Your Life Path Number?

You Are Wolverine

Small but fierce, you're a great fighter.
Watch out! You are often you're own greatest enemy.

Powers: Adamantium claws, keen senses, the ability to heal quickly

Which of the X-Men Are You?

You Are Root Beer

Ultra sweet and innocent, you have a subtle complexity behind your sugary front.
Children love you, but so do high end snobs... when you're brewed right.

Your best soda compatibility match: Dr. Pepper

Stay away from: Diet Coke

What Kind of Soda Are You?

You are a Believer

You believe in God and your chosen religion.
Whether you're Christian, Muslim, Jewish, or Hindu..
Your convictions are strong and unwavering.
You think your religion is the one true way, for everyone.

What's Your Religious Philosophy?

2006-06-22T23:02:00.000-07:00

Here are the results of a personality test I took that I felt was mostly accurate.

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

Extraversion	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Stability	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	76%
Orderliness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	63%
Accommodation	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	83%
Interdependence	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	83%
Intellectual	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Mystical	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Artistic	\|\|\|\|\|\|	23%
Religious	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	90%
Hedonism	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	63%
Materialism	\|\|	10%
Narcissism	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Adventurousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Work ethic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Self absorbed	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Conflict seeking	\|\|	10%
Need to dominate	\|\|\|\|\|\|	23%

Romantic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	76%
Avoidant	\|\|	10%
Anti-authority	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Wealth	\|\|	10%
Dependency	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Change averse	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Cautiousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Individuality	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Sexuality	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Peter pan complex	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%
Physical security	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Physical Fitness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	44%
Histrionic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Paranoia	\|\|	10%
Vanity	\|\|\|\|\|\|	23%
Hypersensitivity	\|\|	10%
Female cliche	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

2006-06-22T20:57:00.000-07:00

A Word on Being Desperate

You know, I have been desperate often in my life. Desperate for God, desperate for a wife, desperate for discipleship, desperate for a friend, ad infinitum. But today I am just desperate to be around people. I have started back down the road of depression, a path I despise. I can always tell when it happens because I quit doing things that take care of my body. I practically had to pull my own teeth to get myself to eat and take my supplements this morning. I never shave. I do just hate shaving, but I have not shaven a lot more than usual over the last few months. I have a harder time convincing myself that I need to brush my teeth. I am fortunate that I am a bit of a germ phobe, because I always shower and wash my hair and wear clean clothes. But, when between Sunday night and Saturday morning you never see anyone for any length of time on a regular basis for anything, including stuff to do with work, you begin to get desperate. You can only talk to people on the telephone for so long. You must have face-to-face contact and feel the warmth of another human being's caring touch. I feel like I am on a desert island all by myself. I don't talk to inanimate objects, though. I do pray, but God created us with a need for being with other people. It got triggered today when my parents told me they weren't going to come up and visit us this weekend. I'd been looking forward to it for like 2 weeks. They can't afford the hotel room now. They had some unexpected expenses. I rarely see my wife or spend time with her, and even rarer my folks. So, I am majorly bummed and hoping that I can get over it by tomorrow. I want to live my life, not be constantly bummed. Besides, when you are depressed, no one likes to be with you. I just wonder what God is thinking about this situation right now, and what he wants me to do. I know this post is probably no fun to read, I just had to find an avenue to express my grief.

That is all for tonight. Please pray for me.

2006-06-21T17:58:00.000-07:00

Just one thought for today. I watched as The Netherlands played Argentina in World Cup Soccer. One of the Argentines went down a little hard when he got slide tackled and got injured. The injury wasn't too terribly serious because he was able to stay in the game. But the dude layed on the ground flailing like a helpless infant and cried like a flippin' baby. Boohoo. I watched Dennis Byrd when he fractured his spine playing on the defensive line for the Jets back in 1993...what? No I don't memorize stats, or what not, I just have a good memory for specific things. I just remember. Anyways, when he fractured his spine, he didn't flail or cry like a baby after regaining consciousness. Nor did Donovan McNabb when he went down this season with serious injuries to his back and leg. What am I supposed to think but, "What a sissy!" I am beginning to see more evidence of why soccer isn't popular in the US. Here, we know how to take our lumps without crying. It doesn't mean I don't have sympathy for the guy, but toddlers and some girls cry when they get hurt, not grown male athletes.

Okay, allow me to further define the "crying" thing a little more. I don't want a million comments telling me what a neanderthal I am. I cry. I cry when I experience things that impact me severely emotionally, both positively (happy crying) and negatively. I don't have a problem with that. But, when you are a man, and you get physically injured or sick, you suck it up and deal with it. If it is serious enough, then you suck it up until you can see a doctor, but you don't cry. I have a problem with "machoism" as America defines it because it tends to be totally sexist and unhealthy, but I still believe that a man is supposed to have a calm, assertive strength that allows him to be strong enough to get through something so little like getting tackled a little hard without crying. If a soldier can get shot in combat and ignore it (let alone not cry about it), I don't think it is expecting too much of a man to suck it up when he gets his "wittle tosey wosies stubbed on the mean ol' soccer field." End of rant.

Just one other thing. Today is Martha Washington's birthday (wife of the first president), which I think is really worth mentioning. Think of what a tough lady she had to be to be married to George. God Bless her. And to day is "Pee on the Earth Day." I seriously don't make this stuff up. I know I have done my fair share, as I grew up in the country. We had bathrooms galore. That said, we aren't here to crap up the earth. Go recycle, reduce, and reuse. I am no tree hugger or hippy. I won't waste my time holding signs that will later just pollute and shouting hate speech that turn people off from my cause and effect no real change. I would sooner join my state's hunting society which invests in reforestation and habitat building to increase herd numbers. There is real change for you. But, we don't inherit the earth from our parents so much as we borrow it from our kids. They will live in the aftermath of what we create or destroy. Be a good steward of God's creation, and recycle. If you're feeling ambitious, join your state hunting club/society. There is a local county chapter near you. And write your congressman about investing in hydrogen fuel technology, because it can and should be done! Alright, I have already written too much. I am going to lunch. Until next time, blessings to y'all.

2006-06-20T17:25:00.000-07:00

I am not getting much love on my blog (by love I mean hits), so I thought I might try to shake and stir things up a little by addressing a controversial topic. That seems to have worked well for Dustin since he started his blog a few months ago. I am thinking of a discussion of systematic theology might be in order. I'll lay my cards out on the table before I start the discussion: I don't like systematic theology. I just don't buy it for the most part. Now, when people ask me, I say I am Calvinist, but that is to avoid having to spend the next 30 minutes explaining and defending my position. I agree with the vast majority of Calvinism, but I am not wholesale. My problem with systematic theology is that all go so stiff on certain points that it requires explaining away the most obvious meanings of other Scriptures that are interpreted to be in conflict with that system. Now, Scripture is Its own best interpreter, so many Scriptures are understood in light of others. I am not saying that there aren't coherent concepts that can be taken from the Bible, but when it is obvious that one thing is meant by what is said and it has to be explained away in light of something else, I have a problem with that. So, there you have it. Not quite as detailed or articulate as Dust-buster can be, but after spending 3 hours navigating the maze of Social Security, that is the best I can come up with. Now on to nonsense.

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Okay, so I just can't make this stuff up. Today, June 20th is Toad Hollow Day of Thank You. Like I said in response to the "Slugs Return to Capistrano Day," if anyone knows anything about this, please let me know. This week is Appreciate {getting the shaft from} Your Plumbing, Heating, and Cooling Professionals Week. Whatever. I wish I could pick something that doesn't take much education and charge people $60 an hour for labor. I think that is enough appreciation, thank you very much. June is National Dairy Month and National Dairy Alternatives Month. I recently read an article in the Vancouver (Washington State) Columbian that eating unfermented soy products is bad for you. It has a thing in it called "isoflavone" (at least I think that was what it was called) which is much like estrogen. The article went on to say that feeding an infant soy based formula is the equivalent to giving them 5 birth control pills a day. So count that out as a dairy alternate, unless you are a guy who wants ED, which is one of the side effects they listed for consuming a moderate amount of soy. And remember, breast is best.

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Okay, um...I have actually been bored enough lately to watch the FIFA World Cup. Well, I just keep it on in the background because I spend most of my time alone, and I don't want the TV to distract me, but it helps it not feel so lonely. Some observations: soccer is played on way too large of a field (I believe that Canadian Football is still played on the same size field, and it is an unfortunate fact that real football descended from soccer). They spend so much time pussy-footing around with the ball. There are way too many guys on the field, thus offense is very limited and scoring opportunities few. No matter how crazy Green Bay is about their Packers, soccer hooligans are far worse. It is like a substitute religion for them. And Europeans laugh at us because we believe in a real and supernatural God. By the way, here is unfortunate proof of what common soccer hooliganism is, and that it has made it to the muslim world: http://soccernet.espn.go.com/columns/story?id=371157&root=worldcup&cc=5901

All of this soccer bashing aside, there have been some thrilling match-ups to witness. Spain beat Tunisia, and that was fun to watch. Today, England played Sweden, and it was pretty exciting. You never really get to see much of David Beckham, so it was nice to get to finally appreciate his talent. Soccer is a bit more compelling than hockey is today, especially with the international competition. I am beginning to see why this is such a big deal for all of the other countries.

A final word to any soccer fan who happens to trip onto my blog, I am not a soccer hater. I love "American" football, and I find the competition and skill involved ultimately more compelling, but I am enjoying some of the soccer matchups going on with the World Cup right now. Don't tell me I don't understand, I know how important soccer clubs are to local morale, but there are much more important things in life than your favorite sports team. I was depressed for a week or two when the Seahawks lost the SuperBowl this year, but I got over it, and it will be a faint memory in 30 years, not a blood feud between me and Steelers fans that still bothers me.

2006-06-19T16:33:00.000-07:00

I know, I know, I have been out like, forever. I probably say this less to you all than I do to that nagging little voice inside my head. I have had a lot of hits in my time off, so I thought that I would try to restart. I will be posting much more frequently than I have over the last three weeks, though it doesn't take much to beat that.

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What have I been up to? So nice of you to ask. Allow me to bore you with the details. I took a trip to Salt Lake City, UT the week before last. I had a training there to become a Social Security Benefits Planner and Advocate for people with disabilities. I still have a couple of field assignments to do in order to complete that training, and that is on top of my homework. I have a lot to do, hence why all has been quiet on the Big J blog's western front. It is great training that will lead to a lot of opportunities both in work and ministry. It is a step in the right direction. That said, Social Security is so broke. For every rule there are three exceptions and for every exception there are ten more rules. If they are going to steal my money to do this work, they should at least enable it to be done. There are so many horrible reasons it takes the government more than a dollar just to get another dollar to someone who needs help. Oh well. All I know is that it won't be there for me when I retire.

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Not a whole lot else to write about. I got the New Super Mario Bros. for Nintendo DS, and it is freakin' awesome. It is a pure side-scroller game like the original Super Mario Bros. for the NES, but it has new updates that are rock on rad. There are a lot of elements that feel so much like playing the original, and there are new cool elements that don't monkey with that mojo. I feel like I am 5 years old again, playing Super Mario Bros. for the very first time (only I don't lift the controller up when I push the button to jump {LOL}). It is the best $35 I have spent lately.

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I want to welcome those of you who have started to visit my blog, namely Soph and Niki. Chelf has been around a while, but I haven't officially welcomed her though, so I'll add you in there too, as well as others who are coming and going that I don't know about. Thanks for visiting. Feel free to drop a comment.

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Okay, one last thing before I go. It was like "Well behaved child day" at Winco yesterday. Jen and I were sitting in there eating our pizza at the little joint they have at the front of the store directly in front of the checkout lanes. It is cheap, decent, and in the plaza of the theatre we were waiting for Nacho Libre to start in (fantastic movie, by the way). Getting back to the "well behaved child thing," we were sitting in there between about 12:45 and 1pm, and we heard only one child scream (not counting the one that was throwing a fit on the way in; he quickly calmed down) the entire time we sat there. That is amazing in and of itself. To top it off, we watched 2 families go through, one was a mother and daughter, and the other was a mom, dad, and 4 kids, and both times the kids pitched in to help with the checkout process. The little girl and her mom were the first ones through the lane. She must have been no older than 7, maybe 8, and she bagged all of the groceries herself, with the exception of one item so big she needed mom's help, while mom paid for it. My jaw about hit the floor. That was followed by the family with 4 kids. There was no bickering, and they formed somewhat of a "grocery brigade" line. They got all of the groceries bagged and were ready to go when Mom was done writing the check. It is sad that this is so out of the ordinary to see anymore. Parents are so into themselves that they ignore their children and don't teach them. It was a special blessing, none the less. It makes me so blessed to know that there are still some good parents out there.

2006-05-26T18:05:00.000-07:00

I am out of it!

Sorry I missed yesterday. I have been busy, tired, and just plain out of it. I am desperate for the long weekend. So, with that, let’s get into it.

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I have run out of anything entertaining to talk about as far as “May the official month of…” so let’s move right into weeks. This week is National Dog-bite Prevention Week. In the spirit of, I think I’ll go slap some rottweilers around after work. Sounds like a good time. It is also National Backyard Games Week. Yup…what?! Don’t look at me! I don’t make this stuff up. Don’t ask me if that is supposed to be meaningful. I don’t even know who would even think some garbage like this up. The turf lobby? I don’t know. Yesterday was National Missing Children’s Day. A good reminder that we need to be very careful with our kids, nowadays. No matter how small the town, predators can come from anywhere. Be safe, don’t be sorry. It was also National Tap Dance Day. Oh, hurray, I had been waiting for that for so long. NOT. And, believe it or not, according to my sources, today is not a day of any special designation. Don’t celebrate anything, just go home and go back to bed. HAH! I wish. Now, for what we’ll miss over the weekend. Tomorrow is National Jazz Day. Uh, huh. Sunday the 28th is, and I’m not making this up, Slugs Return to Capistrano Day. If anyone knows what the heck that is, please leave a comment with a link to more info. From the sound of it, though, I’m going to need more salt. Monday, aside from the obvious is Prayer for Peace Memorial Day. Now there is something worth spending your time putting effort into. We should pray for peace in the lands of unrest right now: Sudan/Darfur, Iraq, Iran, China, Israel, the list could go on. I don’t care who you voted for, we should all be praying for God’s peace and justice over these lands. Monday is also the International Day of UN Peacekeepers, or as I like to call them, corrupt thugs from other countries’ armies. I have stories I could tell you from my Haitian friends who were there during the unrest. It makes me feel like we just need to demolish the UN buildings, disband, and start over.

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A personal message from the great fortune cookie entities to you: Hell is paved with good intentions. Yup, it is the floor you stand on down there, according to them. Sounds like the one that came up with this no speeka da Engrish much well.

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I was at Winco shopping after work, last night. It was between 11:30 and midnight. It is surreal. I had to stop and ask myself what was so different. Then I realized: there were no screaming brats! Sweet! Apparently, most parents at least have the decency to get their kids in bed by then. It drives me nuts that most folks won’t make their kids mind anymore. I remember when I was growing up (early 80’s to mid 90’s) that it was the rarity for a kid to throw a fit in the store, and everyone in the store would stop and stare as the child threw the tantrum. Now, I stop and stare at the children who are behaving and not throwing tantrums because they are more often exceptions rather than the rule. That is one of the things that really motivate me to stay in the mental health field. I desperately want to teach parenting classes so that fewer children will throw tantrums. We wonder why society is falling apart, sitting around, blaming everyone else, and yet we won’t even discipline our own children. It is time for those of us who ride political and social high horses to get our butts off of them and start making this nation a better place by being a good parent to our children. People always say there is no simple solution to solving the ills of society. WRONG! There is no easy solution, but there are solutions, and they are very simple.

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Well. That is about all that I have for today. Have a great weekend. Drive safe. Or better yet, stay home and watch movies and play games with the ones you love, like I am. Worship good and listen hard at church on Sunday, with an open heart to the Lord. And brush your teeth ;p Blessings to ya. Big J

2006-05-24T18:45:00.000-07:00

No one alive in the world today is Youer than You.

This is National Women’s Health Care Month. I am going to lay all joking aside for a moment and say, “Hey ladies. When was the last time any of you over 35 went in to get ‘squished’ or had laser imaging done, especially if you have "dense" breasts? How many of you had your annual more than a year ago? God gave y’all special equipment that you need to be taking special care of, so go do it.” There’s my public service announcement for the day. Seriously, take good care of yourself. Dr. Seuss said in one of his books, “No one alive in the world today is youer than you.” Once “you” is gone, there ain’t no more you for your loved ones. It is also National Revise Your Work Schedule Month. I don’t know where this one came from, but if it were really official, I’d retire. This week is World Trade Week, so go post something on eBay for sale, and designate that you’ll ship it internationally. Maybe you’ll get the world’s longest french fry the next time you go to McDonald’s. You never know. Today is National Tiara’s Day, so get out that crown and wear it. It is also Brother’s Day. I don’t know about y’all, but I am giving each of my brothers a swift kick to the rear this year. Doesn’t that just melt your heart? Enough of this nonsense. Time for the other kind of nonsense.

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Today’s personal message for you from the great American Chinese fortune cookie entities: Confucius say: You have heart as big as Texas. I am pretty sure that Confucius never said that. I suppose some people think you put “Confucius say” in front of stuff, and all of a sudden you sound like some big Eastern guru. Confucius say: Eating dirt make you crafty like blue bird drinking sake (that’s “saw-kay for those of you who don’t know the Japanese word for rice beer) with emperor. Yah, don’t go eat any dirt. You’ll ruin your dinner.

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I hope that those of you checking back to my blog on a regular basis are encouraged by what I’m putting down. I try to balance light-heartedness with all that is going on. It has been way crazy lately, but it is all getting better. God has some exciting stuff in store for me that I hope to be able to reveal soon. I am not sure as to what direction it is going to take me, but I am doing Social Security benefits planning and advocacy training the first week of June. I will get certified in late July, and I hope that will lead to some very unique opportunities to share. What the SS benefits stuff will enable me to do is help developmentally disabled individuals develop a plan to become self-sufficient and thrive. There are so many out there that would succeed in the real world given the right tools, and my job will be to give them those tools. Many of them start their own very successful businesses. It will be exciting to share when it happens.

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Let me tell you, I was apprehensive about the new car for a bit, but it has a flippin’ sweet stereo system in it. As I drove it home last night in my near pristine vehicle with They Might Be Giants thumpin’ on the speakers, I felt pretty cool. If I get a picture of it, I’ll throw it on here. It is a pretty sweet ride. The best I have owned yet. I like it that I grew up poor. I have a real appreciation for the things some people wouldn't dream of getting because it is "beneath" them. Poor people rule!

Until next time, blessings to ya.

2006-05-23T19:15:00.000-07:00

I am a little late today, but I suppose it is time for a new posting. Here goes...

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May is National Heal the Children Month. Awwwwwww. It is also National Prepare to Buy a Home Month. Get ready to get in debt up to your eye balls. Not so good of a month to prepare to buy a home with interest rates going the way that they are. It is also National Taffy Day. Any excuse to eat candy is a good one to me! I'd hit that. It is also World Turtle Day. Whatever.

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A personal word for you from the great fake American Chinese fortune cookie entities: "A woman who seeks to be equal with men, lacks ambition. Don't touch that" This was a real fortune cookie fortune. I couldn't make this garbage up. That is way too hilarious.

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Not much going on today. I actually got to have lunch with my wife. Sweet. Not having to bike in the rain is nice.

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Lately I have been pondering the futility of mankind. If one believes that there is no God, what is the point? If I didn't believe in one, I sure wouldn't be doing what I am doing now. No one to be accountable to? I would party it up. Why bother attempting anything positive that will just be undone by the next person to come along. I would throw it all into just lookin' out for number one. But, I know better. I also know that there are good reasons the Lord set out the laws and principles that He did. I am thankful for how good He has been to me. But, if I didn't have Him, I don't think I would bother doing what I am doing. Why would I? I know this could get endlessly circular, but my point is, "If there is no point, then why bother?" I am thankful that the Lord has given man a purpose and meaningful work to do. Some days that is the only thing that keeps me from the throes of despair.

2006-05-22T11:58:00.000-07:00

Hello All! I hope you had a good weekend. Mine, well, I'll go there later. Let's jump straight into my favorite part of the blog: weird holidays and fortune cookies.

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This month is National Neurofibromatosis Month, or, for people like me, National Diseases That You Can't Pronounce Month! It is also National Etiquette Week. So, for all of you gentlemen out there, don't spit in front of ladies and hold that door open for them, too. Apparently, since it is official, the "great useless holiday entities" require it, too. Some things we missed over the weekend: Sunday was National I Need A Patch For That Day. Okay.......moving right along. Sunday was also National Wait Staff Day. Now, having never been a waiter, but having spent a year at McDonald's, I can tell you that those are some of the most under-recognized people in the country, so if you get great service and leave no tip or a lousy tip, shame, shame, shame. Do those people who can be legally paid less than minimum wage in most states a favor, and leave them a pleasant cash tip. Today is International Day for Biological Diversity. Everybody except for the white people. You know what I mean? Because we aren't diverse by definition. At least that is what the self-appointed black leaders tell us. And, so that I do not appear to be a total boob, here are some resources on Neurofibromatosis which is a very serious disease: http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=Neurofibromatosis. Read, be informed, prevent, and care.

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A personal message from the great fortune cookie entities to me at a not too distant past trip to Panda Express: You have a flair for adding a fanciful dimension to any story. Translation: You are a really creative liar, which doesn't mean anyone believes you, they just laugh about it. I think they meant for me to give this to my younger brother, Jason. When we were growing up, he told the biggest fish stories about events that (never) happened to him, and with unwavering conviction, even when he contradicted himself multiple times.

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Well, my wife and I paid a little more than we should have for a 1994 Honda Accord this weekend, but it was worth the price of admission, and I don't have to ride a bike to work in the rain anymore. It has working cruise control, and a nice cd player. The person who had it before us put a bunch of bling on it which, though not the determining factor, was a nice bonus. It sure was nice and comfortable to drive around. Now I just have to get my broken down old 1985 Honda Prelude towed away.

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I have been quite crabby lately (interesting side note: my blog spell check suggested I replace crabby with caribou). I think all of this alone time is really getting to me. I am in need of actually conversing with other human beings face-to-face, and because of the way my life is structured (with school and work), that isn't happening. I am learning that the telephone just isn't the same or sufficient for that. It is the oddest thing. I have never experience such isolation in my life. It is tough for this social creature to deal with. I am actually a little morbidly curious whether or not this time will permanently alter my personality or communication style, or if it will just all be over when it is over. I am hoping for the latter, and for it to be sooner rather than later.

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Speaking of later, I have to go wash my binker and put on my "big boy pants" to get ready for work (heh, heh). Still so much to do and so little time to do it in. Blessings to y'all.

2006-05-19T17:43:00.000-07:00

This is National Correct Posture Month, so don’t slouch! Sit up straight! Square those shoulders! I know you were raised better than that! Now that I have that out of my system…It is also Reading Is Fun week. So bust out that romance novel or the latest copy of the National Enquirer and read about Sasquatch winning the Indy 500. I am sure that is what they had in mind. Today is National Bike to Work Day. Check. It was a wet muggy day to be biking to work, but, because Jen and I have one car and she takes it to work, I did my part. It is also NASCAR Day. You know, there is no NBA Day or MLB Day or NFL Day. Apparently some corporate entities will go to any end to promote their sport. So here’s to sweaty, hairy, shirtless rednecks drinking beer while they watch supped-up Chevy Cavaliers making left turns. I am not a NASCAR hater. I can only watch about the last 20 laps of a race and remain interested, though. Today is also Celebrate Your Elected Officials Day. As if lining their pockets with our tax dollars wasn’t already enough. I bet they are the ones who passed a stinking bill to create this holiday! Enough of this.

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Here is the truth from the great fortune cookie entities for you today: Your emotional nature is strong and emotional. Yup, that’s you alright.

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That is all I have for today. I’m looking for a car this weekend, so prayer for that would be awesome. I am very tired of searching and want to find something. You all have a great weekend, and blessings to ya.

Big J

2006-05-18T17:22:00.000-07:00

Well, this month is National Get Caught Reading Month. Consider yourselves caught. I suggest you read something intelligent and educational in supplement to my blog. It is National Nursing Homes week, this week. Ewwwwwww. I’m beginning to wonder if there is a National Road Kill week, or National Dirty Toilet week. What is up with these disgusting week/holiday observances? Today is International Museum Day. Celebrating you being bored. Really bored. Bored out of your mind. I don’t know about you, but after going through elementary school here in the Pacific Northwest, I felt like if I had to go to one more pioneer or Indian museum I was going to hurl! It felt like I went at least 3 times a year all the way until the 6th or 7th grade. And rounding off today’s weird holidays is Send an Electronic Greeting Card Day. Sheesh! Who comes up with this stuff? Anyways, send that special someone or your mom an e-card. They’re free, they’re easy, and they take like 5 seconds. Here is my favorite e-card site: www.virtuaflorist.com. If an e-card isn’t enough, you can send a real bouquet of flowers through them.

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Keeping with the weird fortune cookie thing, I have decided to tap some resources and make this at least a semi-regular feature on my blog. Any fortune I give will be from an actual fortune cookie, either I or someone else, has gotten at a restaurant. I've just enjoyed it too much to give it up. Today’s fortune: Never wear your best pants when you go to fight for freedom. This is a freakishly weird fortune, but could you disagree?

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We have these multi-million dollar machines that make the computer parts here, where I work. They have alarms that go off on them because what they make takes a long process, so the engineers set the machines and go about working with others while one is processing. The alarms on these machines sound like ice cream trucks. I kid you not. A lot of them sound like an ice cream truck playing “Do Your Ears Hang Low” on its PA as it rolls through the neighborhood. I have to suppress my childish urge to just burst through the doors screaming, “ICE CREAM! ICE CREAM!” like a little kid running after the truck. The impulses and inclinations of a sleep deprived mind.

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I smile a lot. I am just that kind of guy. I like to be happy. To me, it is a testimony to how Jesus has changed my life. Through my smiling ways, though, I have found there are two types of people. There are those who get it and those who don’t. Now, I didn’t learn that just by smiling, but it has really illustrated that. There are those who smile back at you and tip their head, and there are those who just look away as if you don’t exist or like you are a freak for smiling at them. There used to be a t-shirt that said, “Smile, it makes people nervous.” That is so true. One way or another, I am gratified by the results of the experience. Maybe it shouldn’t be hilarious to me, but it is. So don’t be someone who doesn’t get it. It usually doesn’t mean they just passed gas and you are walking into their cloud or that there is something funny about your appearance. If someone smiles at you, smile back. I think this world would be a little better of a place if most people did.

2006-05-17T17:45:00.000-07:00

Happy National Effectiveness week! Now get out there and accomplish something, you loafers! Happy Turn Beauty Inside-Out Day…er...wait. That just sounds like that would not end well in Beverly Hills or Palm Springs. If you live there, I don’t recommend you try to celebrate this day. It just sounds like it would turn out (pardon the expression) gross. Blech!! It is also National Work at Home Moms week, so celebrate those hardworking moms!

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More fortune cookie madness. We went out to Panda Express again the other night. This time Jen’s fortune cookie read, “Accept the next proposition you are offered.” Maybe the great fortune cookie entities are hooking up with the great chain letter entities for a grand pyramid scheme. What if the person who opens that up happens to live in Jersey, walks out of the restaurant, and accidentally stumbles off the sidewalk into the back of a guy involved in the mafia, and he says, “Hey buddy, you wanna die!” Imagine the resulting law suits. Or even worse, what if their broker calls them up right after they open the fortune and offers them overpriced Enron or Cloneaid stock!! I think they should just start telling jokes on those papers instead of fortunes. That might be safer.

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Today I have had MC Hammer’s “Can’t touch this” stuck in my head. I can only remember the first three lines of the song, so it gets annoying. I don’t know if it is better to be stuck with “Can’t touch this” or “Ice, Ice Baby.” Barf. I do kinda miss that era of music. Maybe I have selective memory, but foul language was no where near as prevalent in that music as it is today. Sex was sang about only in steamy love ballads, which I had no interest in (I think I was in the third or fourth grade when “Can’t touch this” hit big). It is sad to see the most popular forms of music become little more than an avenue for artists to express wanton sexual lust and hatred for rivals. That concerns me about the direction of society, but that is for another blog, not mine. I am just happy that I can smile, sit back, and enjoy when I pop in my classical music or They Might Be Giants cds.

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Buying a new car is such a hassle when you have to buy used and are in the sub-$10,000 category. The AutoTrader has been really dry of leads, local papers haven’t had much, and I have had to talk to one too many sharks at used car lots that want to sell me some insurance totaled vehicle. Yah, no thanks. I really can’t complain for the most part, though, as the weather has been so beautiful for riding my bike to work. My dear, sweet wife is picking me up at 11 PM, though, and having to get up for work at 6:30 AM. Getting a new vehicle would take a load off for her, so we are trying to move semi-fast on it. Anyone selling a reliable used Honda or Toyota?

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That's all my hurty brain has for today. Blessings to ya.

2006-05-16T21:31:00.000-07:00

Happy National Sea Monkey Day and Biographer Day! Yup, those are the bizarre holidays for the 16th of May. Now you all have an excuse, so crack open that cold one and toast the Giver of all good things and sea monkeys and biographers. Hey, I had to throw in something worth toasting. Here is the weird holiday site I got this from. http://www.brownielocks.com/month2.html

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I learned the hard way the other day not to fart in an air shower. We have these air showers where I work because of clean room facilities necessary to make the computer parts we make. They are supposed to blow all of the particles off of you. You push a button and step in the door that automatically opens for you. The door closes behind you and you are in this 3'x3'x7' chamber. The air blows from nozzles all over the chamber, and then a door opens in front of you into a "cleaner" area. Well, I thought since they are supposed to blow all of the air particles off of you that the air would circulate through a large system or a filter. Man was I so wrong! The air recirculates inside the chamber, and you are trapped in that chamber for about 30 seconds. For the first 5 seconds, I was thinking, yah, this is working out nicely. I didn't even have to say "excuse me!" All of a sudden, I realized what was happening. I wasn't getting rid of the stink, I was just evenly distributing it! I practically fell out of the chamber when the door opened after the air shower. I immediately took huge, deep breaths. I felt really sorry for whoever had to use that air shower the next time. I even triggered it to run one more time before I left the clean room area to try to get some of the stink out. Learning things the hard way...

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I have been reading in Josh McDowell's book More Than a Carpenter for school. It has been a really interesting read. It is basically a solid, basic level apologetic for faith in Christ. He makes some good arguments and keeps it simple. But, even as simple as he keeps it, I think he over-complicates the argument for the resurrection of Jesus. With all that there was, a Roman guard and the governor's seal on a 2-ton stone rolled in place by a lever system, covering the tomb, the resurrection is the only argument that makes sense. If the body was stolen or somehow else removed, someone would have died for it, be it the guards or the individual attempting to steal the body. Even if His followers had proclaimed Him alive while he still lay dead, the leaders of the Jews and/or the Romans would have taken his body out of the tomb and rolled it straight through the middle of downtown Jerusalem for all to see. But none of that ever happened. It would have been recorded somewhere if it had. But it isn't.

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This is about as exciting as it gets somedays. Because of my work schedule and what I do at work, I actually spend less than one hour interacting with people out of 24. It is kind of a surreal experience...one I look forward to putting behind me.